Where do you live? Do you have your own apartment?

This does not look good. First of all this man does not have his life together. Let him get his life together first. No you do not need to move in with his parents and child when you are not even married.

I am worried that a few years in you will open your eyes and realize you are being used but he will have trapped you with a baby.

A childless woman of 24 can do much better than this.

"I feel bad but I enjoy when his mom goes to work"

She probably feels the same when you are not around. Not trying to be mean...I just know from experience it is really hard to live with a MIL.

You guys should really think about living apart until you can save enough money to live together on your own.

You are already starting to feel some resentment towards his mom and that will only grow and you will start to resent your BF because he isn't stepping up to the parenting plate like he should be.

I just groan when I read stories like this. Am I reading this right? You're with the baby all day and bf doesn't really help? Do you work or are you just playing mommy all day with bf's baby?

I hope you have a life and job. I hope your future includes standing on your own two feet and not just moving in with bf and inlaws to become defacto step mommy/nanny. I have a daughter just a few years younger than you and I would strongly caution her against a situation like this being her future.

You've been together for a few months? Are you living with the BF at his parents house? Do you work?

When I met my fiance my SD was 2 years old, SD was also an oopsie (from a relationship rather than a one nighter) they moved in together to try to make it work and were split up before SD was 6 months old.
In the beginning I was a little bit nervous that 2 years from their split might be a bit too fresh when involving such a young child.
SD was used to living with her dad and seeing her BM when her BM wanted, I knew my entrance into the mix would bring about big changes.
To be honest, I dont think I would have been keen to pursue a relationship with my fiance had his split from BM been more recent.

Whilst its great that your boyfriend has help and support from his parents, it reads like his parents are raising the baby not him. So ultimately he is no better than the BM for leaving that baby with other people.
There is a difference between a father who is working hard and parenting hard on the limited time he has, then theres lazy fathers who use work as an excuse and are reluctant to get hands on with their child. Type A are worth effort, type B are not, because type B will always pussy foot around everyone to try to manipulate everyone into taking care of their problem and ultimately their child.

Hello,

I'm fairly new here and to the role of being a step-parent to a 9 yr old. I've been in her life for a couple years before hand and I also have a DD with her mother but I'm going to give you the same advice I gave to a very close female friend of ours...RUN!! Run away as fast as you can! I know this isn't what you want to hear but I truly feel that way. My reasons why is, because you've only been dating a short period of time and you're love struck by all the amazing what-ifs of the life you picture. Soon that will wear off and from what you're already saying is that he isn't helping change her diapers, etc. His parents are taking responsibility of things he should be doing. I change as many of my DD's as I can. I also bath her, feed her, put her to sleep at night. I do everything humanly possible for my daughter, that's my job. Doing anything less would make me feel less of a man. You shouldn't have to encourage him to get more involved, that's his job as a father.

What I said to our friend who was in your situation was, if you can't see yourself marrying this man and staying with him forever, to help him raise that child, run now. Don't wait till shit gets worse and that child loves you tons, it will hurt her a lot and you. Our friend broke it off with him and she's doing very well without the drama and moving on with her life and in a new relationship. As a step-dad who loves his SD very much, I would never recommend anyone dating someone with a kid and I do quite often tell my friends who ask for advice exactly that. I hate to say, its just a lot more drama than I ever thought it would be. Especially when you have to deal with a shitty ex and if you you're lucky, you don't, there will still be a ton of baggage to deal with.

Good Luck,

Please don't take my response as a negative one, I just want to see you happy!

Cheers!

24 year old woman in similar, more developed situation. Trying to graduate college(one more year!), and you and I are almost lining up tit for tat. 

Though I can't give straight forward advice, I can pass on some that has been given to me-

It's great that you care for her. There are ALOT of misunderstood stepmom figures in the world. And some just don't feel a connection,(and that's perfectly natural).

However, it can go south really fast. Every stepparent who has chosen to have an emotional presence in their SK lives always want the best for them, to have endless amount of support and unconditional love. But, some parents view children as possessions and twist them to keep them loyal to their emotional crutch and needs.  Be prepared for rebellion, maybe a few arguments. This stepparent business is a loaded mine field, we are dammed if we do and dammed if we don't. We are reprimanded for being to close and not being close enough. It's a touchy balancing act. Communication with your partner is key, to find a solid parenting plan, which is what is going up in flames for me right now. 

Anyways, one thing I learned early on is that the BM will be in your life for the rest of your life, physically present or not. Whether he is mom of the year (or 5 hours) painting nails, making cupcakes, until it's back to reality and she just wants to be young again, and leaves baby to you. 

It is not your job to pick up any emotional splitterings or pieces left behind by either parent. 

You will be expected to do the work without the title, or a thank you, so be prepared. I am suffering through this and I feel really selfish but you matter just as much!

You are young, the world is so open before you. I am not trying to be cruel, but just recently I have to start accepting the reality of my situation and where I stand within it presently. Just decide before it becomes too painful.

It takes two to parent, there are three of you, and one is doing the work. You do the math. Something doesn't look right.

Are you prepared to do this for the rest of your life? These are the comments made to me when I brought forth my dilemma. 

Just trying sympathize with your situation. Baby's father is my best friend and was my high school sweetheart. It's never easy to consider, and I have been at mental war with myself since I got advice and answers. 

We are perfect strangers, but this dumpster fire never burns dimmer or gets easier, if you want to go, go. You've got to be happy, live your life. We are both young, but it won't last forever. 

Best for ya,<3