Just remember, Skids are not your kids and you are not their mother. If you want that true mother-child bond or if it important to you to be "Mom," then I would try for your own. I would hate to see SSs become adults and treat you differently because "You aren't my Mom." It happens and that would be a huge slap in the face after all these years. Plus it seems to be generational, then you aren't Grandma either, if your SSs have children, so it can make a SM feel isolated because there are no biological bonds to tie you to the family you're in. 

Read up on other blogs around here. A lot of women have given up having bio children because they are SMs and many do grow to regret it. Ultimately the choice is yours and you need to figure out what's best for your situation, but make an informed decision and determine what you can and cannot live with or without, not just now, but 20 years from now. 

Having your own kids It is its own blessing and it can be a fulfilling experience. 

I will not say it's not a lot of work because it truly is.  But it's also a special bond, where you see glimpses of yourself in another human being. 

My stepmother never had children of her own, and she came into my life a few years before going into menopause. I love her like a mother. I love both of my mothers. She is the first person I would call in any situation. I asked her if she ever regretted not having bio kids and she told me that life had other plans for her, and we are like daughters to her. My bio mom passed away so my situation is different. But think about what you really want... it's your life and your skids have a mother already. 

It's all up to you at the end of the day!! Don't let your life with skids take away your possibility to become a mother.

'Your biological clock is ticking, and you may regret it' then you've probably answered your own question. Because you are questioning it.

The first thing I would say is of course life is great before having your own kids, time and money to do what you want when want! Trust me from someone who has no childcare, those days were awesome!! Having a baby at 35? Not gonna lie, it was a shock as I was so accustomed to my lifestyle so long, but it's so so rewarding and entertaining. I found its less hard if  You raise your child around the lifestyle you want to continue to lead. (your pets /holidays etc etc) whatever it is, you've just got get your child out there with you doing what you would ordinarily do.

The second thing I would say Is that there are step parents out there who can love a child like their own, I'm sure there is. But when you carry and give birth to your own baby /raise your own child the way you'd like to raise them? There's just a love, a bond that you can't explain. Even when they're being absolute wallys and you're so tired! 

I used to question whether or not I wanted my own kids... because of such a negative experience with SD. When I met her we would do activities together, play, hang out, etc. Then as she grew older, the "you're not my mom" started to happen. Forgetting everything I did for her and zero appreciation. Resentment set in, and I let DH know. 

Things had changed and I 100% felt like I couldn't "love SD as my own" as so many people say. I didn't have any say when it came to raising her, instilling values, etc. I basically was the polar opposite of how BM chose to raise her. There was zero co-parenting between DH and BM. Both parties totally disagreed. 

DH and I both decided we would do things SO much differently with our own child. We had accepted we couldn't change the situation with SD, but we could 100% decide how we wanted to raise our own kid together. I am due in a few weeks and couldn't be more excited! 

Look, it's not for everyone.  In a way I think waiting longer and longer now for women to have kids has it's drawbacks.  You become more attached to your child-free lifestyle and finances to 'give it all away' with kids.  At the same time, you don't have to make a decision today, maybe keep it back of your mind and re-visit in a couple of years, you still have time.  Did you want kids before your skids?  You get to see how much work kids really are-yes you have the bond but the work is just like you see now.  But it will be 24/7.  

I love my sons but my oldest has mental health issues (his dad was a lunatic too) and most days now I regret having him-horrible to say I know.  I'm more bonded with my younger son (also young adult) but to be perfectly honest? I don't think I enjoyed motherhood the way most women do.  If I had to do it over not sure I"d have kids and would rather have dogs and an easier life.  Kids bring a LOT of stress, you give and give till you have nothing left with VERY little return-that is the honest truth.  Then come teen years -hell.  Then what if the kid has a developmental issue or mental health issue, that's a whole other bag of TOUGH life.  It's not for everyone but society makes us feel as if all women should want to or will regret it if they don't-and that's just not true. I think a lot of that talk is jealousy because they have easier/fun/nice lives in comparison so they try to guilt others into being miserable like them lol.

If you are questionling whether or not to have your own in fear of regret, then consider having a child if your situation allows it. I have two SKs. My daughter was an "oopsie." She is the best thing that has happened. You will not have that bond with other people's kids. When I have a bad day being a stepmom, my daughter makes it brighter.

I have never had BKs. I raised SS-28 as my own.  His mom and I met when he was 15mos old and married the week before he turned 2yo. So other than the pregnancy, delivery, and tiny infant bits, I was there.

StepParenting certainly can be a challenge. I fully recognize that fact and my SParenting and blended family marriage is about as ideal as it can get.   A great partner who was already parenting her young son with standards of behavior and who fully expected the two of us to be equity life partners and equity parents to any children in our home.  Hers, mine (that never happened), or ours (also never happened).  We have remained dedicated to that model.  I have no regrets.