Part of that is simply her age - she'll probably be more mature after she marries and has kids of her own. Probably being the operative word.

I don't know your financial situation but my wife and I have separate income from retirements and we each accept responsibility for separate household bills. Anything left over we're free to spend how we wish. She gifts her kids and I gift mine as we see fit.

This way we have no reason to criticize each others spending habits.

My SK's (19 and 15) are exactly the same way. The only thing that helped was DH had to get a part time job along side his full time job to meet his financial obligations and he keeps his part time money separate so now when the kids call begging for money, he knows that if he is going to give them money it must come from his part time job money and you know what? he doesn't want to do that, he hates working all those extra hours and he'll be damned if he'll give it to them. FINALLY he sees

Yes. We've been there and done that. Husband will *occasionally* get a Father's Day text because birthdays are following. It's very frustrating dealing with that entitlement. When the time came that they felt it was time we buy automobiles, I had switched to a lower paying job and we had another baby. On top of being taken back to court a month earlier for more child support. We were strapped. Hubs explained as much to his child. That we just weren't in the position to buy her a car. The venom she spewed over that was the straw that broke the camel's back for me. I was disengaged and remain that way and it's been almost three years.
Unfortunately, in my SD's cases, they were taught from a very young age that dad is a scumbag, he's a deadbeat (who has never missed a child support payment), he loves his new family more, etc. etc. BM has told them that since he isn't there for you emotionally or physically, take all that you can financially. Money and gifts was really the only thing he was ever good for.She taught them to be takers. Unfortunately we didn't nip this in the bud nearly soon enough. We fed into this by attempting to buy their love throughout their childhood. Had we/he put our feet down earlier, perhaps it would have curbed their entitlement and expectations.
Soon after YSD graduated from high school and the child support obligation was over, there was a flurry of contact from both BM (who, surprisingly, after years of vile poison was sweet as pie without any court backed upper hand) and the YSD asking for help with college costs, with vehicles, and with money in general. They wanted this money with no strings attached and weren't willing to be transparent regarding what it's being spent on. We did some real simple fact checking (they asked for $400 to secure dorm room and we called the university and it was only a $200 deposit) and decided we weren't going to have a part in it. Because honestly, it is very clear that we mean nothing to her other then cash and/or gifts. So we said NO. The first few times we explained why. The requests keep coming. We continued saying NO. Then, we just ignored. By this time, the BM had resorted to mass emailing my hub's family pleading for money. Quite pathetic really. After realizing this was getting them nowhere, we've heard not a peep. NADA. In a way it's sad when I think about it. The only bond their mother allowed them to have with their dad involved money. When we closed up the international bank of dad, I realize they feel like their relationship was over. They feel rejected.
While it makes me sad that the relationship is in the state that it is, my hubs has made it clear to her that he's open to a open authentic relationship. I don't think she's capable of it though, unfortunately. And really, we've had very little contact with her since she was 15. She's a virtual stranger to us now.
BM was hellbent on breaking the bond between father and children. She stated that clearly upon the divorce, and over the years after. She was successful. Pat on the back, BM. You won. The kids lost. But it doesn't change the fact that repairing this is probably not gonna happen.

I can't get over these men who are afraid of their offspring. Pathetic, really.

We have 6 kids between us. One was a money grabbing cow and like yours only contacted for money etc., she wanted a new car, had the make, model and colour all picked out. We could not afford it. I was driving a 13 year old car at the time with no electrics or,air con, just a basic car. Like your dh, mine was terrified to say no, because princess would stop talking to him. Well luckly my daughter and her husband were paving their yard in their new home, it was a $3500 expense that they were going without things to meet. As we all do. I told dh I would give his princess $3500 towards a car, but I was tired of his kids getting everything while mine got nothing yet he and I were both working earning about the same and we combined our incomes. So, princess could get that, but my daughter would get the same for her paving. Dh nearly fell ver himself saying yes.

Princess ges the money the very next day and cracks the shits askng if he expected her to get a car loan and pay for her own car. Yep damn straight. She was 24 working full time earning hood money, yes I expected her to get a car loan, even if daddy didn't. I gave my daughter her money the following day. She cried with gratitude.

The monthly bank statement came in a couple of weeks later. DH was shocked to see a $7000 withdrawal. When I explained $3500 for his daughter and $3500 for mine came to $7000 he said, did you give your daughter that money, I said yes, I told you I would. He said. I THOUGHT YOU WERE JOKING. I told him that from now on, if his got a cent, mine got a cent, so he could gve his kids whatever they wanted but I would give my kids an equal amount in cash whether they needed it or not. That was 10 years ago. He hasn't handed out a penny since.

If you don't have bio kids. Every penny he gives his daughters take the same amount for yourself. Open your own bank account and save it r spend it, whatever you want.

when the skids were in their teens, they would ignore dh for months on end, never returning phone calls. dh would leave voice mails on the phone he paid for and virtually beg them to call him. now they are adults and realise that bm is not giving them a penny. now sds are oh-so sweet to their father. its stomach turning.

My SDs are the same. They only call/txt when they want something. Today's kids/young adults think the world owes them! You are in your 20s time to be an adult and support yourself!