I made a mistake
Hi everyone. You know, I realized something; since I joined this forum, I have made a huge mistake. I would read others posts and would join in and complain and say how horrible my SD is. I thought about this today. When I was responding to others posts, I should be offering advice and support for that posters situation. I should not be using it as a platform to complain about how rotten my SD is. When I realized this I felt like an idiot. I'm just bursting at the seams to share what a horrible person SD is but I realized it's not appropriate to jump into another's persons post and start complaining about how much I can't stand my spoiled, entitled SD. I want to apologize to all of you whose posts I've managed/attempted to hijack. I would like to work on being more supportive of others, posting responses that are geared toward giving support and advice as opposed to complaining about what a truly rotten and horrible person my SD is. I think I've really misused these boards. I want to be more supportive of others and post my own issues in the form of new threads rather than complaining on someone else's thread, "piggy backing" on others posts in regards to how truly awful my SD is (and she is awful, OMG). The thing of it is; I am so disgusted by her behavior and I am even more disgusted by how my DH used to defend and makes excuses for her. I couldn't even say the first syllable of her name without DH running to his precious little princess snowflakes defense. He would attack me verbally if I so much as moved my head/eyes in a way that he interpreted as being negative to the rotten brat. Of course he never defended me when the little bitch was calling me names and accusing me of horrible things. Thank goodness this stopped but I was the scapegoat for this little moron for years. I'm surprised we survived this. She is so incredibly evil that I just can't stop complaining about her. My DH has been an idiot when it comes to his little princess. Little psycho princess brat finally showed her true colors last year when she told daddy that she will never speak to him or see him again until he divorces me. Good riddance you spoiled brat; it isn't going to happen. Why don't you go visit fantasyland and keep your little dreams/fantasies to yourself. Daddy finally stood up to her. I am proud of DH for telling this 30 year old rotten brat that he will stand by me but I still have a lot of unresolved anger towards her for the years I had to spend kissing her sick ass and catering to her every whim because daddy felt guilty because princesses mommy and daddy got a divorce. Grow up you rotten spoiled brat; get over it. I resent her so very much. Ok, I'm done. My main message is that I want to thank you all for listening to me, providing me with amazing advice and being so supportive. You all are an amazing group of people. Thank you again for all you do.
I agree with you. I am new
I agree with you. I am new her as well and let me say I do this. I see someone post about their skid and i cant help to I see my own skids. And your completely correct about no one to vent to! I hope in time i can step back from it as you did. You don't realize how many people share you situation until you find something like this place. It almost makes step life somewhat more bearable. I know for me, it gives me hope! And I'm not talking about hope for the skids to just disappear. It's the hope that one day the resentment, anger, frustration, hate, and depression will one day be just a faint memory, or at least not as strong. I must say that everyone on this site has provided me with some sort of peace of mind.
Good observation, OP.
Good observation, OP. Thanks!
I don't mind that people
I don't mind that people share their own stories/frustrations when I post. It's good to know I'm not the only one going thru the topic at hand. I have never felt like my post is being hijacked cuz if somehow my post helps someone get something off their chest and they are relieved of some of their frustration (even for a little while), I'm all for it.
Exactly! This is a forum
Exactly! This is a forum where the mere idea that other people are dealing with the same crap helps. Don't beat on yourself, Amber! We all help each other in many ways... sometimes just by being here and sharing our stories.
I agree, feel free to share
I agree, feel free to share any stories on my posts, it's ALWAYS good to know others are dealing with this shit too.
Not that I would wish it on anyone, but I guess I see it as we are all sharing and commiserating, and sometimes offering advice based on our own experiences.
But sharing is caring.
I'm the same way. I do
I'm the same way. I do hijack I guess but I do it because it's a comfort to me when I see other people went through it too. I not only don't mind people telling me their story, I welcome it.
I doubt if you actually
I doubt if you actually hijacked any Threads. As I read through the answers already in existence when considering posting a answer of my own I watch for key words such as "My" or "In my case" "I had this happen". I'm immediately on notice that the responder is going to tell what I call a "war story" much like veterans do when reminiscing.
I skip the rest of the response saving myself the time and confusion of which problem I'm answering by the time I get to the bottom. Yes I've been guilty of it myself.
StepAside, I always enjoy
StepAside,
I always enjoy reading your posts. You are very knowledgeable and you have excellent writing skills. You always offer a good perspective.
I like what you said; just to write as if I'm having a conversation. Thanks.
Oh god yes, THIS EXACTLY!
Oh god yes, THIS EXACTLY!
I agree with StepAside that I kind of look at posts like conversations, and it's normal in a conversation to say "I know what you're going through / you're not alone because I have this skid who...." It's sharing, not hijacking! It's the ones who say "I didn't bother to listen to you or anyone else who commented before me, I just want to talk about myself for a minute" who are hijacking. ![Wink](https://prod-cdn-1.ststatic.com/sites/all/modules/contrib/smiley/packs/kolobok/wink.gif)
Don't beat yourself up. We
Don't beat yourself up. We all do it. I am just as guilty. But, honestly, I hope my posts make people stop and think about what I did or do wrong and don't do it themselves. There are others on here with similar stories and that helps me to read and comment. Just keep doing that and it does get better.
Really agree with you. I am
Really agree with you. I am also guilty of 'cutting in' with a SD story of my own. So many times someone has written back, "Hey - that's what I've been going through too." But I know what Amber is getting at and I'll try to focus more on support and resist the urge.
Thank you for saying that. I
Thank you for saying that. I really appreciate it.
Hi Catmom. That was really
Hi Catmom. That was really kind of you to say. I follow your story and I like you too. There are so many great people here and even though we all have never met face to face, it's easy to get a feel for others and what they are going through. I'm just so happy to have found such a supportive place to share stories and experiences.![Smile](https://prod-cdn-1.ststatic.com/sites/all/modules/contrib/smiley/packs/kolobok/smile.gif)
I think sometimes repeating
I think sometimes repeating the stories here helps us (esp as women) process what happened. I know no one else in my life who is in my shoes except you ladies and guys. No other step parents who talk about their situation. It's really helped me heal to tell my story (over and over and over :). I hope it's not too annoying too.
Lol--- smiling at how u
Lol--- smiling at how u describe your SD. It's like your typed words are coming from my mouth.![Smile](https://prod-cdn-1.ststatic.com/sites/all/modules/contrib/smiley/packs/kolobok/smile.gif)
PS.... My bf's dtr won't give
PS.... My bf's dtr won't give him an ultimatum because he's her instant ATM.
I wanted to thank all of you
I wanted to thank all of you for your thoughtful responses. I appreciate all of the support that all of you provide. I haven't been posting a lot lately because I've been busy but it's alwwys great to visit this site and read all of your stories, thoughts and comments. You are all such a wonderful and kind group of people and I feel so fortunate to have found this forum; you all helped me get through one of the more difficult experiences of my life. I hate to think of other people suffering because of their stupid step-brats but on that same note it's nice to know that I'm not alone. You all have a nice weekend and thanks again.
Amber
I wanted to thank all of you
I wanted to thank all of you for your thoughtful responses. I appreciate all of the support that all of you provide. I haven't been posting a lot lately because I've been busy but it's alwwys great to visit this site and read all of your stories, thoughts and comments. You are all such a wonderful and kind group of people and I feel so fortunate to have found this forum; you all helped me get through one of the more difficult experiences of my life. I hate to think of other people suffering because of their stupid step-brats but on that same note it's nice to know that I'm not alone. You all have a nice weekend and thanks again.
Amber
I like when posters give me
I like when posters give me examples of similar situations they have dealt with. It helps me to know I am not alone and to hear their perspective on it.
If I need more info from the poster I will usually follow up with a question, just like having a conversation LOL.
Thanks Amber - I appreciate all you input!