Family Reunion
So there's a big family reunion this Sunday with my DH's family, and since the adult SD brats and the equally as immature BIL/SIL's will be there, I've convinced my DH I do not wish to go. These people refuse contact with my DH for over a year now over such petty garbage, but they'll grasp at any little excuse to hate me and hate him.
I'm THRILLED to not be going and have to be around such evil, mean-spirited "adults", especially since this is a once in maybe 5-10 year occasion with his family. I simply refuse to be around these scum.
Besides, they'll all be grateful I didn't show, and won't even mention why I'm not there.
One of the family members is distraught that I refuse to go and keeps telling me "you'll let them win", but I don't see it that way. It's not a win-lose situation for me, I simply could care less to be around rude and immature adults who refuse to put on their big girl panties, and big boy briefs and actually treat me with decency and courtesy.
I don't feel at all like I need to save-face and show up just to show them I'm not going anywhere, no matter how mean and rude they are. They already know I'm here to stay, and I know DH is and has been very distraught over the loss of relationships, but I've been in heaven getting some much needed time with just the DH and not all the drama and rudeness.
I figure, let him go and try to engage with them and start building the relationships again. I don't need to be there.
What do you all think???
Since the family reunion
Since the family reunion fiasco that I just went through this summer in Vegas with DH's family, I will not go to anything that his family wants. Thankfully, they all live in other states.
Don't go, it is not worth the stress. I really thought it would be fun with his family, but I resent them so bad for their lack of compassion with DH and his situation with SD and BM. I can not forgive them for what they did.
It is a shame we can not pick our in-laws....Just because we married into the family does not mean we have to like them.
Good for you! I used to say,
Good for you! I used to say, "A little masochism never hurt anyone” but a good friend convinced me that it does. If DH's kids and relatives dislike you so much they might even compete with each other to insult you if you go to the event. So you see, you are probably getting to them because they will get the message that you think you are too good to be around slime - and you are. Stick with your guns.
The good thing is, a MAJORITY
The good thing is, a MAJORITY of his family like me/us, and are angry at the bitter-groupies for carrying on as long as they have, being that they are grabbing at anything to just be downright nasty.....and immature. The bad-apples will DARE NOT say anything negative about me there for fear of making the rest of the family mad at them for even saying anything. One family member told me if there is anything negative said, they'll fire off what happened to one of the BIL's at his bachelor party years ago....he's got pics....and apparently this BIL's wife (who's the most evil one) doesn't have a clue what happened.
Thanks for the input, I feel better about my decision. I really don't believe they'll view it as "they've won". They'll all be relieved I won't even be there to make them feel uncomfortable.
It will actually be funny that my DH is going. Since he's directly related to these scum, he'll feel confident in being at least cordial and maybe get his kids to engage in a little conversation. I'm sure glad I don't have to walk into that den of wolves.
Update from the weekend
Update from the weekend Family Reunion:
So the self-entitled little shits (SD's 21 & 23) didn't show up. They've been brewing the hate fest against their dad for over a year now with DH's father (grandpa) by all of a sudden calling grandpa for Father's Day (instead of DH) and sending a card for grandpa for his b-day, which they've never bothered to do before. Didn't work, because DH and his father are still close, so maybe they just decided their silly little hate games aren't toxic enough, and why bother showing up. Or, maybe their hatred for their father runs deep in their veins.
At least DH and his brothers got along great, because that's been iffy over the past year. DH avoided the SIL's, and didn't even say "boo" to either one of them.
I'm still glad I didn't go. There won't be another big get together like this again with the entire family for years to come.
SA~~ yes, EXACTLY. The SD's
SA~~ yes, EXACTLY.
The SD's have complained (about me and daddy) to the bitch SIL that is the ring-leader of the gang over the past two years, and she's supported them 100%, including telling off my DH that he's not a fit father and butting into his parenting because she thinks she can do it better. It has caused a HUGE rift in the family between his brothers (and me, cause I've been caught in the middle of the chaos/drama and being blamed what a mean SM I am.....). The SIL is THRILLED to have these self-entitled brats adore her because she can not have children of her own. So stealing my DH's is the next best thing for her.
No, the games and the no contact from his daughters will continue for years to come. Too bad they aren't smart enough to realize, them not contacting/engaging and generally coming around in our lives has made our marriage MUCH HAPPIER. I hope they stay mad for a very long time. I and my DH are getting a MUCH NEEDED break from the immaturity/drama. Although, DH misses his little princesses to death and will continue to try and contact them, with the hope someday they'll have a relationship.
Little does he know, the brats will remain loyal to their mother until she's six feet under, who is hell-bent on punishing him for the rest of his life because we cut her off (phones) from contacting us/him, and she lost control of abusing him verbally. That was the beginning of the end of his relationship with his daughters.
DH completely ignored the bitch SIL who's tearing apart his family, and I am glad he had a good time with his brothers. At least they are willing to move on and cut the crap drama and have a decent relationship with their brother.
I don't suspect the bitch SIL to change. She wants these brats all to herself and play second mom.
Have fun with that.