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Am I being over sensitive?

Disillusioned's picture

So H calls YSD weekly and we generally have a long call with her. The last few times H has called YSD had not answered or returned the call. H continues to call and leave messages which I think is excessive but anyway, he calls YSD again today on his drive home from work and this time she answers. H told me later she was bawling and telling H that she and her bf broke up. This is bad news because they have just bought a house together and moved many many miles out west Sad she has now moved out of the house they bought

Anyway, YSD tells H not to tell FIL about it. Then H asks YSD if it's okay if he tells me about it. H said YSD said of course, she wants me to know too.

Now, normally it would not have bothered me if H asks permission of YSD to tell me about something going on in her life. I'm not her mother/blood family although YSD has gone out of her way to make sure I feel that way Dirol

But...after reading some recent posts from SM's who feel SD's shouldn't be telling our H's not to tell us things, I felt a little bothered that H would ask YSD if it was okay...what if she said no? Would H keep it a secret from me? So here she is with this big event in her life that my H knows all about but wouldn't tell me if YSD didn't want him too

When H said that I asked him as much. He got defensive of course. I asked him if he and SD's have secrets I know nothing about

I don't know...just wondering if I'm over-reacting

As far as my YSD, my heart really goes out to her. I feel so sad for her right now Sad

Pilgrim Soul's picture

I had the same thought as Catmom: he was just being protective of her privacy since what happened is such a big blow to her self-esteem. And she said yes, she wants you to know, so that you could commiserate, i guess. I would let it be. Don't rock the boat.

twopines's picture

SD28's and SS30's personal life is none of my business. I honestly couldn't care less if DH asks them permission before he tells me something regarding them.

Trinka's picture

He probably would tell u anyway but would tell u that your not supposed to know. Don't sweat it. Many other things in life to be sweating.

momof5_1969's picture

Agree with Trinka. I think he was just being sensitive to the nature of the personal thing that his daughter had just told him -- I'm sure he would have told you also, but wanted to show his daughter that he could be trusted by asking her if ok that he shared with you. I wouldn't make too much about this one.

Disillusioned's picture

Thank everyone, appreciate the feedback. I figured I was over-reacting a little so your comments have made me relax about it Smile