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I need insight and help please! about custody cases

ohxitsxapril's picture
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okay sorry ahead of time if this is kind of long, just trying to recap the situation. DH and BM split in December of 2008. She ran off with SD. (she is 6 now). Moved 98 miles away, no contact, no warning or anything. She got a Protective Order on DH, saying things that were not true. He didnt see his daughter or hear from her in 21 days. He moved near the area where she was at (after she finally told him), because he lost him job. They worked it out (not together, but talked for SD's sake) and he got to see his daughter on his days off twice a week. Then in June, he mentioned maybe SD could live with him for the rest of the summer, till she started kindergarten. She flipped thinking he would never give her back all this, changed her number and wouldnt let him see her when he tried to go over to her house, gave her money and everything. He moved back to where he originally was at in July.
No contact from BM at all. He got her new number from the car dealership in which he was the person to contact (BM stopped paying the car payments) and he was able to get her new number. Called it and she answered and it was screaming and yelling and then she hung up and changed her number again. Then comes October 2009, DH finally is able to afford a lawyer, get the process started. BM switches jobs and moved in with her BF to avoid getting the court papers. Finally get a trial, BM doesnt have a lawyer, she requests to get one, so the trial is moved to a week later, of course it was to buy time, no lawyer. After much arguing and such, they finally agree and a temporary order is in place, DH is able to see SD after 6 months and 5 days. (Dec 15th 2009)
We have gotten her EOWE since then. In feb 2010, DH's lawyer sends a discovery request to BM asking for SD's current address, where she goes to school, copy of Birth Certificate and Soc. Sec. Card, and a copy of a health insurance card. She denies all of it. (He has a freaking right to atleast her school info and health insurance card!! what if she gets a broken bone when she is with him or something..!!?)
All the while, He has been trying to call BM to speak to SD, but she wont answer. SD has called him 3 times this month, atleast she is somewhat letting her call him. BM's lawyer sends questions to him about his income and such. he sends all the info she requested. Her responses to the questions he sent, his lawyer finally mails to to him to see it. Its not good. We think she thinks that he actually has more money than he does. he doesnt. When the temp. order was in place, she had a job so he has to pay 268 in CS. well NOW she is unemployed and is on all types of govt help. (Food stamps, some kind of SSI-supposedly SD is disabled..??! and medical insurance through the state, maybe even section 8...) but she is lying because she said she is not living with anyone else but her and her daughter, but she is living with her BF.
DH has had violent tendencies in the past. He choked BM when SD was 1 and he got a misdemeanor. He has been through anger management AND parenting classes after that though. BM still stayed with him. That was almost 7 years ago when that happened. She was trying to say that SD is scared of DH, she is clearly not. She runs to DH EVERY TIME they do the exchange. We have video of them two having fun together. My concern is that while he didnt get to see SD he was dumb and posted some angry stuff on Facebook and BM found it. she printed it out and it doesnt look good. Mostly about how he wishes she could feel the pain of not having his daughter. He also made 2 comments out of anger about how he would hurt her. He was angry at the time and he shouldnt of posted it on the internet!!!

OKAY sorry about all that but my questions are, what are the chances of him getting visits that arent supervised and his CS going up because she is unemployed? (BM is requesting supervised visits) He honestly does not have any more money he can spare, he barely makes it as it is.
I am also worried about how that facebook stuff will look to the judge. even tho it is not about SD. He has never been violent with me. he has a quick temper, but he goes to another room to cool down. He is not trying for full custody, or really even joint custody. He just wants to see his daughter and be involved in her life. Ive been documenting everything i can.

sorry SOOO long, any advice would be helpful.

Rags's picture

CS should not go up because BM is a deadbeat and can't keep a job. In our experience (SS-17) the court should not penalize the NCP due to unemployment of the CP. We attempted to get CS increased when I was unemployed due to a credit that BioDad received due to my historical high income. We figured that since I was unemployed at the time we went to court that at least the judge would stop the CS reduction credit to BioDad. CS tripled but not due to my lack of employment. It had been 9 years since CS was last modified. The Judge retained the credit to BioDad because of my earning potential and not my actual income.

If your judge holds to that logic (as much as any family court idiot in a goofy black robe is capable of logic) DH's CS should not go up due to BMs unemployment.

The visitation thing is a crap shoot. It depends on the judge and how much weight is given to DHs FB outbursts. Combined with his history of violence toward BM I would say it may be a significant issue.

Good luck.

Success is rarely final. Failure is rarely fatal. It is character, courage and consistency of effort that count. Vince Lombardi (with some minor Rags modifications) To each according to their performance, screw Karl Marx. (Rags)