SS6 has singled me out as the one and only person, he wants to make miserable...
What do you do, when you see someones split personality everyday? SS6 has the mentality, vocabulary and attitude of a 50 year old man and he knows how to turn the sweet child act, for the people he wants to see it. I, on the other hand, get to see the mouthy, manipulative, defiant and unruly side of him, EVERYDAY. Always when I'm the only one home with him, always when other adults are in the other room or out of ear shot. He listens to NOTHING I say...obeys none of my rules...rants and raves when I give him responsibilities/duties. But, if anyone else asks...he hops to! BM passed away when he was 3. He lived with her and her parents until her death. When he came to live with us, the bottom fell out. He has resisted me from day one. I do and do for him...everything I do for my own son, I do for him as well. I get no appreciation, no respect, no thank yous...my son who is 3, knows when a thank you is in order, why doesn't my SS? I resent him...most days, I hate that he is here. Most days I wish my husband had never met his mother. I feel horrible thinking these thoughts, but they are involuntary. It's just how I feel. I have lost almost all love for him...I care for him to keep him safe, clean, fed and healthy, but I have no feeling in my heart for him. Living with him, is like having a border...a strange person in your home, making you feel uncomfortable, wishing they would just leave....UGH! Tell me someone, how do you fix that?
Funny, I do that to my cat
Funny, I do that to my cat when he gets on the kitchen counter!
LOL my mom did this to me as
LOL my mom did this to me as a kid .. except it was a full glass of ice cold water.
Worked like a charm!
I did this when my first DD
I did this when my first DD was experimenting with throwing tantrums, nothing like a half glass of nice cold water in the face to stop a tantrum....
It's a sick feeling, isn't
It's a sick feeling, isn't it? All the what ifs....I know for certain, my household, marriage and sanity, would've been much better off.
Yes, VERY sick feeling! I
Yes, VERY sick feeling! I tried explaining this sick feeling of all the what ifs to DH and he was so offended, I've learned to not talk to him about it anymore. That's what this website is for now
Thanks all.
Let me just say...I cannot
Let me just say...I cannot wait until my SS is 30 and out of the house...hopefully, after highschool, he will go to a college far enough away, that he has to live there.
Check out the Countdown Timer
Check out the Countdown Timer on my blog. lol
Thanks everyone...I would
Thanks everyone...I would like to think that the water thing would work, but I know him, and he would love it..think it was funny. Sad but true. Even truer and scarier...there are times that I truly do want to slap the shit out of him...I have to put him in his room and walk away at those times. That happens occasionally, when things are at their very worst. I feel out of control at those moments and have to lose myself in something else...usually I just go steal some love from my son. It reassures me that I am capable of raising a respectful and loving child. MY son, is my everything.
I have told myself over and
I have told myself over and over, I am going to do this. But out of guilt and impatience, I always return, right were I started. Just last night, after another nightly round of his snide and snarky comments, I told him he better get up early, b/c he would be responsible for doing all the things, I usually do for him every morning. Make his own breakfast, find his own clothes, pack his own backpack...etc. "I'm not helping you anymore, until you can learn to be helpful to me." As I walk out of his room..I think to myself...he's 6. And I feel a little stupid.
OK...I don't know what's
OK...I don't know what's going on, but I've tried to type a responce to your post at least 5 times now, and everytime, something has gone haywire and it has disappeared???
First off, where do I find a list of the abbreviations and there meaning? Apparently I'm not smart enuff to figure them all out on my own... :?
To answer your question...my husband knows of his behaviors. I tell him everything, but I think he thinks I overreact. He always responds with, "well, I can't get either of them to listen to me." Such crap.
Long story short (I'll try anyway), my SS lived w/ his mom and her parents, from birth to 3 1/2 years. She found out she was ill, shortly after he was born. While she fought and eventually succumbed to her cancer, he was being raised by his grandparents (which would explain his much older personality). During her sickness, my husband got to see his son very little. They were always using her sickness as an excuse. It was disgusting. It was a lose/lose for us. If we asked to have him, they made us out to look like the heartless assholes, taking a son away from his ill mother, OR if we slacked off b/c of the excuses they were giving us, they'd tell people that "he (my husband), just never even calls to come see his son." My husband lost out on 3 1/2 years of bonding with his own flesh and blood and meanwhile my SS was creating that bond w/ his grandpa. THEY created the monster he can be. They did and still spoil him sickening rotten, granting every request, every whim, every want...all to pacify the poor, poor child who has lost his mother. I am not a heartless individual, it saddens me that this child has lost his mom, but buying his happiness, has created sooo many problems, in our home. UGH! At any rate, the relationship between my husband and my SS, is starkly different than the one he has with our son. It just has never been right. My husband has tried, but my SS is slightly resistant to him to. However, when dad raises his voice, he will listen.
...I dreamed of creating a happy home, little did I know, one child had the ability to take those dreams away. Now I know.
I'm glad your situation came to light...that must've been such a relief. Good for you. Thanks for your comment too.
hidden cameras. If your OH
hidden cameras.
If your OH doesn't believe you about his little shit son, tape or film it without the kid knowing, and SHOW your OH what you are dealing with.