You know that feeling you have, when you're headed to a family event at your DH's, and you dread putting up with the nasty inlaws and adult stepkid.

You hope it won't be all as bad as you worry it will be, you try to think positive and tell yourself yourself you'll enjoy yourself anyway, you won't let them get to you, you won't let them ruin your Christmas. You think, they have been better lately maybe just maybe they will surprise me and show some class. Hey it's Christmas maybe that will motivate them to at least be civil

Then you wank in the door and yup, they behave like total assholes to you - even worse than you dreaded they would be!

I should have known by the standoffish behaviour from SGS when we first arrived....this always tells me that DH's daughter has been PASing SGS against me again (and based on her behaviour later in the evening this is exactly what she was doing and couldn't even hide it)

Second clue DH's daughter had 'regressed' was the lack of any sort of hello from her, or DH's sister, let alone actually saying Merry Christmas

Regardless, I took the high road and walked into the kitchen where they were preparing the Christmas brunch and asked if there was anything I could do to help. They continued talking to each other as if I hadn't spoken. I gave them the benefit of the doubt thinking maybe they may not have heard me since in all fairness they had been talking when I walked in. I waited for a second and then asked very clearly again, if there was anything I could to to help. Silence. I stood there and the silence from them continued. It grew into a long silence. I remained standing there in disbelieve that even they could be so out and out ignorant to me that way. Finally, DH's daughter said that she didn't need any help. She was so rude when she said it that she didn't even turn around to face me when she said it - kept her back to me the entire time

Then DH's sister mentioned something about that they might need help later. I told her to call if they did and walked out of the kitchen

Then, after a few minutes DH's sister comes out and says to me oh so sweetly in front of everyone that yes, they could use my help. I knew walking in there that it would be worse than their rudeness before. Sure enough, as I suspected, once I was in there doing the 'task' DH's sister gave me to do, DH's sister and daughter went right back to excluding and ignoring me, laughing and carrying on with each other as if I weren't there in that space with them

And the behavior went on the entire time we were there

DH's daughter doing the old "show DAD the pictures of SGS" deal with SSIL, making a big deal of DH to SGS while downplaying me, the constant exclusion from her and DH's sister all day, the snarky comments, too many things to list. Just unbelievable

And the best - DH's family draws names for Christmas each year and this year I got his daughter's name. I bought her something very nice that she clearly liked.....Yes I should have known how she would respond. Of course rather than thanking me for the gift she did the old "thanks guys" routine, knowing full well DH had nothing to do with the gift

Guess I should thank her...lately she has been seemingly improving towards me and although I will never get sucked in again by her cycles of "good behaviour" towards me, I was starting to think that maybe she was just starting to grow up a little and I was unsure of how to respond, now I don't have to worry. She (and DH's sister) have proved once again to me that my instincts were right all along - they continue to hate, live to hurt and humiliate and "get back" at DH and especially me for perceived wrongs that live in their imaginations, and their justification for acting like assholes, even on the one day of the year you would think they would try to demonstrate an ounce of human dignity - not so!