DH and I have separate accounts. One week he pays for groceries and the next I do. I tally the bills and give him an amount, he then withdrawls the money and hands it to me. We split everything 50/50. We've thuoght about the joint account for bills but haven't gotten one yet.

I'd like to hear this as well. DH and I have combined our incomes (he just hands over his check) since moving in together. I'd like to seperate our finances also, but he does not make the same amount of money I do and he won't be able to pay for half of the household expenses. Heck, after paying SS's private school tuition, he'll barely have money to pay half of the mortgage (but then again, the house is in my name), so maybe it be best to just let him handle all the other bills: utlities, insurance, groceries, etc.

I'm interested to hear how people went about seperating after starting out combined.

Dh and I have separate checking accounts and savings accounts.

He pays the house note and insurance and I pay all other household bills. That is right at 50/50.

We also split groceries/necessities. We also split repairs ect. The only thing we do not split is our own bills. Cars-boats-ect. Each pays their own way on that stuff.

Some stuff is up for discussion…example…say he wants a new expensive couch and I do not want a new couch or to pay for half of an expensive couch. He will then buy couch on his own if he wants it bad enough.

Going out to eat. We don’t eat out a lot but we normally just take turns paying. It works wonderfully for us. We rarely, if ever fight over money.

My favorite subject! I would like some ideas too. We have both a joint account and separate accounts but things get murky. Our finances are pretty much intermingled.

Does anyone use proportional contributions - if DH makes more, he pays more - but what if my kids live with us, and his don't, should he still pay more? For big-ticket items? Should we save more - together or separately? I am very conflicted about what the expectations should be. The way we do it is pretty loosey-goosey and it's ok until some big financial issues come up.

Does anyone have a situation where your DH is retired/will retire before you do - then what happens? Is it better to have separate finances then? Is it realistic?

At one time I had two kids living with just DH and I. At that time we split everything 25%/75%. DH 25% and me 75%. It was fair.

My current DH and I have one joint account. We seem to be able to make it work. We are over 50, and married 3 years (almost). In my previous marriage, we had 3 accounts, mine, his, and ours. "Ours" had equal percentages of our earnings going into it, and it was sufficient to cover living expenses, including entertainment. My ex was irresponsible with money, and I needed to be in control of the "ours" checkbook (before online bill paying) to avoid overdraft fees, etc. That need continues into this marriage, and I do all the bill paying. We both have ATM cards to the joint account, and we have separate credit card accounts, but they are paid with the joint account's money. I really like being with someone I can trust with access to my money, and who trusts me with his. However, I own the house we live in, and he has no legal connection to it. I own my own car, but I am joint on his. My retirement accounts are separate from his. I think big assets and things like 401K accounts and insurance policies are the issues to deal with in step situations, especially if you both have children but none together (like we do), so inheritances are clearly defined. Things do happen, and you have to be prepared for the unlikely events life has in store.

If you are younger, and only one of you has children, the situation is different. I think any woman (or man) needs to have access to enough emergency money to handle unexpected events, and have a "nest egg" if the marriage fails. Hope for the best, but plan for the worst!

we have our own separate accounts and we also have a joint checking and savings. his whole check goes into our checking and i give him whatever is left after paying bills and contributing to our savings (i match him dollar for dollar). as the kids age out of child support, he will get more $. we use our savings for home repairs, christmas, vacations, etc... he recently took a pay cut so is now unable to contribute to our savings (praying it's temporary). when he is unable to contribute to savings, my contribution goes into my personal account. i will never supply a penny, either directly or indirectly to his kids and ex wife (unless i choose to do so). dh isn't so responsible with his money and if i contribute more $$ towards bills and savings than he does, he spends on his kids, mother and the rest of his family, so i took control of finances. no way he's going to give more unless OUR needs are met first. i have some personal bills i pay with my account, child support is his bill. not very romantic but i saw how i was going to be ripped off and put a stop to it.

We split household bills based on our incomes. I make a lot more money than DH, so 50/50 doesn't quite work out for us. Our individual bills (student loans, child support, credit cards, etc) are not considered as part of the split.

We each put 15% of our paycheck into savings each month. This money is used to pay for vacations (some including skids, some not), repairs, big ticket household purchases, etc. We also contribute to our own individual retirement accounts.

We alternate grocery shopping each week. Sometimes I pay more, sometimes DH does. Over time, this tends to balance out.

Anything we specifically need for skids, DH buys. Kid shampoo, toothpaste, clothes, shoes, bedsheets, etc .. DH purchases those items.

Anything left after all of that is completely up to us to spend how we want. We have completely separate checking accounts and one joint savings.

All of this being said, we are flexible and understanding with each other too. I don't hold DH to the "rules" 100% of the time and vice versa .. and neither one of us abuses that flexibility.

Some items and repairs we split 50/50. I make more money than him, so sometimes I end up paying more, but I'm ok with that.

When we go out, it varies. Sometimes I pay, sometimes he pays and sometimes we split it.

We actually do not have a joint account and never have. All of our monthly bills get paid directly out of my checking account (most set up before I met him), so he gives me his share plus half of the groceries and other household items monthly. We have a credit card that we put almost all of that stuff on and I just add up what he owes when it comes due.

He is responsible for building up his savings account and I'm responsible for building up mine.

Both SDs are adults now, so child support is a done deal but this has always worked for us so we just keep it this way (we have been together 16 years).

Other people I know have one joint account for the household and their own separate accounts for whatever else.

Different things work for different people but money can be a big issue in a relationship, so it's worth discussing and finding what works best for you.

We have separate accounts because when we had a joint account, he would get paranoid that I was using "his" money for things (drinking too much does a number on a person) so when we got back together, I insisted on separate accounts. That way he can SEE how much of his own money he blows on what I consider frivolous stuff.

I make more than him even without taking CS into account. Luckily, that is set to end in June.

He gives me a set amount every payday. More if he gets a bonus or OT. He has also said that he is planning on giving me the CS he is paying when he is done with paying it so that I can fast-track paying off all our bills. After the bills are paid off, he wants to still give me the majority of the extra money to put into a savings account for us because he realizes that 1. he is not that great with money and 2. I supported him through a lot of lean times brought on because of the CS and related skid bills.

I don't think there is any "right" or "wrong" way of doing things. It is whatever you agree to that each person thinks is FAIR. That might be different for each couple.