Hello.. im new to this site..And im in dire need of advice. it was recommended to me by a friend. i have been married for 4 years and have 2 step kids a 10 year old boy and an 8 year old girl. He has 50/50 custody of them. My husbands ex  wife is insane. We have had to get orders of protection against  her, she has been diagnosed with severe narcissism and border line personality disorder and even tho courts know shes crazy, everything seems to happen in her favor. Since day 1 the kids and I have had a wonderful relationship, even after all the bashing and lies their mother has made up about me, it never once had any affect on our relationship. She has made false police reports, made false accusations against me at my job, and the list goes on. She constantly would keep kids from us. we have at least 30 police reports done. Kids would beg us to not send them home, that we do not know what they go through with her. She curses at them, calls them names, constantly would scream at them, would throw things when she got mad, i cant even get into half of the horrible things they would tell us.They would always beg me to be their mom and i would always say they have a mom and she loves them. My husband would have to physically carry them to the car when it was time to go to her. everything was recorded and written down. we have been to court several times, and the kids were assigned a law guardian, and he only spoke to kids at her house. He claimed he only goes to the house of the residential parent. Kids told him how great it is with mommy and told us they only said that because they were afraid of mommy hearing them.Over the years they have been to 5 child psychologists. Every time she heard something she did not like she would stop taking them and bring them to someone else.  All of them told my husband the kids need to be taken away from her, but yet nothing has been done. Last summer after spending a week with her they come here beginning my husband to break up with me. They were different children. Saying they hated me and they knew all the things i have done to mommy. My husbands daughters birthday is before his sons and i had written on my facebook wall saying happy birthday to her and a picture of me and her, his ex showed his son and said see she loves your sister more she did not write anything for you for your birthday. His son told his daughter hes going to do bad things to me and destroy my stuff till i leave... One of the issues is his son is into barbies and girl stuff and 5 of the therapists they have been to all said not to promote the behavior, they said if he is playing with the stuff dont take it away, but dont buy things for him. well on her week vacation she got him 20 barbies and a barbie house and said it was not fair that mom buys that for him and not dad. Anyway, the past few months has been hell with them, the kids have been so difficult.. lying non stop.. stealing from our house, and his son has become socially detached. he does not want to leave pajamas and does not want to play with anyone. he has no friends from school and just wants to stay on the couch the whole time, and his daughter is having severe temper tantrums when she hears the word no.. when we tell her no she will say things like shut up i better never hear no from your mouths again...She has been purposely scheduling things on his visitation and telling kids about it and then they don't want to come here. We got them ipads for christmas and we found out yesterday that they have been texting her non stop, his son.. every time he asks for something here and we say no he texts his mother and she says ok she will buy it for him, his daughter.. when she gets in trouble sends pictures to her mother crying making it seem like we are monsters and texts her saying daddy said no i cant have something .. lying about things that happen.. and the mothers reply is well mommy said you can have it... The kids have no Independence and shes doing it on purpose so they depend on her and babys them beyond believe. she favors the son he is the golden child and the daughter is almost like the scapegoat..His son who is 10 almost 11 and is going into middle school in September, she invites him to sleep in bed withher all the time, and when he comes here he cries unless my husband lays in bed with him. Hes just very babyish..The son stole a notebook we have been keeping the past few years of all the things his ex has done things kids have said.. he stole it and gave it to his mother...we have noticed money missing from our wallets.. prescription medication..kids and mine relationship is worse then ever they are my friend when they want something and after they get or i tell them no they go home and bash me and lie about me...they are going to a counselor but shes 27 years old and is not a licensed child psychologist and is inexperienced and claims she does not talk to parents.. my husband calls her all the time and she said she dotes not talk to the parents and wants no background info. He feels like there is nothing he can do and fathers have no leg to stand on to help their children. Please someone help!