Congrats to you for getting out when you did- and I hope you enjoy your new life without your ss. The kid sounds really disturbed and you absolutely did the right thing by removing your daughter from the situation. I don't think you are "evil" at all, but I do think you're a great mom for putting your child's well-being first and not allowing her to stay in an environment where she was being mistreated.

Oh my god no, to the millionth degree, you are not evil! Your SS is the evil one and the more I read your post, the more alarmed I got! And I was sooooo happy to read that you got you and your DD out of that situation. Your poor daughter, no little girl should have to live like that.

I don't blame you at all for being resentful toward your H. I would be too! He is blind and an idiot to not see what his son was doing and to just expect you and your daughter to live with his behavior. Something like that could traumatize your DD for a long time. No kid deserves that. And it's very alarming to me that your H won't even take the word of a therapist that his son needs help. Does he think his son's behavior is normal? That's frightening.

Good for you for doing the right thing for your daughter and yourself. Your H is in for a world of hurt if he continues to ignore his son's disturbing behavior. His son is going to end up in prison someday. You don't need to stick around and watch that unravel. Or continue to watch your H bury his head in the sand. That's just insane. The fact that you and your DD are happy and you don't miss him should validate even more that you did the right thing. Good luck to you!

All was bad with him and all is good now.

This kid is going to hurt someone and himself perhaps seriously sooner rather than later. You need to be sure it isn't you or your kid. I would go so far as to say only a evil parent would have stayed but evil isn't the correct word.

You stay away permanently.

Your FIRST priority is your daughter. You shouldn't have let it get that bad- sorry, but you know it's the truth . And ANY MALE going into my DD's room at night would get testicle punched so hard, it would turn them from a turkey to a hen. Don't make your daughter be in SS's presence ever again.

I am sorry for what you have been thru.
You did what you had to do for your daughter.
Marrying someone with kids can be a nightmare especially when the dad has no nuts.
Best to you and your daughter!!!

(((hugs)))

You needed to protect your daughter AND yourself from (at LEAST) the train wreck coming...if not out and out molestation or serious injury. That is really really creepy.

YOU ARE NOT EVIL FOR PROTECTING YOUR FAMILY (which is only the ones who have your back in a pinch, i.e. NOT your hubby).

And you know what, it's totally okay for you to love your husband. IT'S OKAY. It's NOT okay for an innocent little girl to be constantly harassed in her own home. You're the only one who's looking out for your little girl and I am so, so glad that you made the safest decision for her.

I don't think you would have been "evil" if you had stayed, but I do think that would have been an incredibly selfish decision. I feel like these days, far too many people think it's okay to be selfish and they put their partners above their children. As a child of abuse, I just want to say THANK YOU for putting your child first, and not putting a man before her. THANK YOU for getting her out of a very dangerous situation. THANK YOU for being the kind of mom every child deserves to have. THANK YOU for putting her safety above the feelings you have for some guy. I genuinely, truly am so glad that you made the decision you did. Please don't beat yourself up over this; far more parents should be like you.

Mmm Hmm and amen! I fully support trying to make relationships work- as long as there are not issues of infidelity or abuse at play. The thing is, your daughter was clearly being... I can't say "abused" because I don't know what went on in your home, but she was surely put in a situation that no child should have to be in, especially not at the tender age of 8 when she isn't physically strong enough to defend herself from her psychotic step-brother. And yes, the boy sounds clinically psychotic. I'm not trying to be cute here or exaggerate words- based on everything you've written I think he has some VERY serious issues, and his parents need to address that before he hurts someone. My ex was diagnosed with bipolar disorder as well as a personality disorder- he was put on anti-psychotic medication and when he went off his meds it was NOT a joke. People with these types of illnesses HURT other people- and I am not a professional, obviously I can't diagnose your ss but please try to make sure this kid is checked out, because his behavior is honestly very scary. I am SO very glad you and your child are away from that environment. I only hope the boy's father is receptive to getting him some help but the way you describe things, it doesn't sound very promising. You can't fix what you didn't break, hun, but I do hope your DH will listen when you say his boy has ISSUES.

Can you just imagine, being 8 years old, small, not much muscular strength, and a Teenage Boy sneaking into your room at night and making threats or demands or God only knows what else? Can you imagine feeling that little and vulnerable and someone trying to exert their authority over you? The thought is terrifying and I am So Glad your baby girl doesn't have to live with that over her head anymore. Please, if you do anything else, please try to get that boy some help. While it is totally NOT your responsibility, you may just save some other little girl having to go through what your child did. Your SS is sick, literally sick in the head, and I really think that you trying to get him some counseling may actually make a difference. Let's just pray that his parents agree.

God you are strong. Your daughter is so lucky to have a mom like you. I know its hard but you will always feel good about putting your child first.

Good for you! You've done the right thing for you and your daughter, you've proved that by being happy after so long of being miserable.

No one has the right to treat other humans like your SS did and no one has the right to condone it like your husband did.

You will eventually find yourself a nice man who will love and cherish both of you and perhaps restore your faith in human nature.

That does not make you a bad person. I got married to a man that is the same way his oldest daughter hates my daughter. She is very jealous of her and always hits her, and bullies her with her younger sister. My stepdaughters live with us too. You needed to leave for your own sanity.

I married a man with two sons. I love my SSs, or should say I did. My oldest SS is such a manipulating, conniving liar who will say and do anything to get himself out of trouble or get what he wants. He's 14. It's progressively gotten worse over the last 3 1/2 yrs and this past Thursday he crossed a line. I had my DH and both SSs move out and go to stay with MIL. My DH and youngest SS still come over and be with me and my 3 children but I do to want my oldest SS around my children. Not until he has completed some counseling and some work at repairing the damage he has done. My DH and I are also to start counseling along with the other kids to work through issues caused by the oldest SS.

I have to say, although it hurts to not have DH here with us, I don't miss the tension that seemed to be always present when oldest SS was around. Who knows....maybe this will become a permanent setup.