I have been the been married to my DH for 12 1/2 years. During that time, I basically raised Skids..Who were 15, 12, 8, and 3 at the time we got married. They only went to BM's every other weekend. Also, we had 3 kids together..so a total of 7 kids. The BM was not involved in their day to day life, could not even take care of her apartment and keep it clean when she lived by herself. It was torture for me to send skids to the weekend visits, because there was never structure, disipline....or follow through with homework and such. My relationship with BM has always been pretty rocky because she was always so two faced to me and was always putting the kids in the middle. She also lived 45 mintes away..so the distance was just right for me. Last August, she got married to a really nice guy and he seems to help her understand how things really are and that she has been mad at me all these years unreasonably. She also moved to the next towm over..only about 15 minutes away!! I get along with him great and -----all around--- it has been going well. IMAGINE THIS!! My DH and I were invided to a New Years Party at Sd23's house with BS11, BS9, and BS8 and SS15. Also Invited were BM and her New husband and SS 27 who is Autistic. My SD23 is married and has a 2 year old and a 2 month old, and I really wanted to support her in this..even though my DH was pretty hesitant..AND not a big house at all....BUT..It went well..CHARADES!!! FUN! NO DRAMA!!! All COOL !!! What really rocked my world tonight was finding out that BM 52 is now pregnant. I really dont know what to think....Should I just be happy for her....but what about the fact that she has FOUR children that she finally is being able to be more involved in the kids lives..and the lives of the Grandchildren. What about that fact that I basically raised her four other kids for the last 12 years. Help me on this...Help me get some clarity please!!