You are here

At a loss for words

k8tie's picture

Submitted by k8tie on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:44pm

Forums: 
General Discussion

I am totally at a loss for words about what I found earlier today in my SD7's overnight/weekend bag when she stays at BM's. I was cleaning her room and noticed her bag in the closed that she had forgotten to give to me to wash her clothes. When I dunped it out a friggan pacifier fell out!!! As I said, I am at a loss for words and I havent confronted her about it nor my husband as I just dont know what to say and I dont want this to turn into a fight. She is 7 for GODS sake...why in the world would she have a pacifier??? Have any of you ever found something that totally blew your mind and we at a loss for words? I am just dumbfounded and dont really know how to bring this up with SD or my hubby withouth it causing turmoil. Thanks, I guess this was just a vent on my part.

Katie

SizzlinSMom's picture

Submitted by SizzlinSMom on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 4:03pm

Does SD have smaller siblings at the other house? Cousins? Friends? It could have been placed in the bag on accident. I really don't see a 7yr old using a binky.

boogeymom's picture

Submitted by boogeymom on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 9:37pm

While you're at the photo shop, can you blow up the picture I'll be taking of my in-laws cutting up my 9 and 11 year old Skids' food for them? Ugh, what is WITH people who treat their kids like babies?!?

k8tie's picture

Submitted by k8tie on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 4:17pm

No other siblings, she is an only child. I am not sure about friends or family though. I just thought it was very strange to find one in her bag.

My SD still has a sippy up at BM's as well. I am not sure how often she uses it there but I know she does. I am guessing DH doesnt see a problem with him still using a sippy?

Katie

12yrstepmonster's picture

Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 6:14pm

Well dumb question here but does she have a babydoll that is possibly a newborn baby size? ODD18 had a baby doll that went everywhere with her. She was newborn size wore newborn clothing, and yes the baby had a pacifier that it couldn't "use" but was baby had a diaper bag packed just like she was a real baby.

Just a thought.

k8tie's picture

Submitted by k8tie on Tue, 03/15/2011 - 10:32am

Sorry I have been taking a break from the computer. I did ask her about it after debating weather I should or not and she did admit that mom lets her have it "sometimes" at night in bed! Come on....she is 7 for GODS SAKE!!! The only good thing about it is that its not messing up her teeth from what I can tell but still, she is WAY too old in my opinion. I told her I do not want to see her with it at my house but if she wants to have it there fine....but NOT here.

Boogey, her mom does the same thing and cuts up her food for her which I will not do here. She is old enough to eat like a big girl. Now if I can only get her out of those damn diapers at night, that would be great! Sorry again for being AWOL, I needed a break from the computer.

Katie

k8tie's picture

Submitted by k8tie on Tue, 03/15/2011 - 4:41pm

Hi again, I was just wondering if this is something I should not worry about as long as I dont let her have it at my house. I feel she is way too old for it and it will have negative affects as she gets older. I really want to tell BM to take it away but it would probably not do any good other then to cause more friction. Its SOO hard having a set of rules at our house and when she goes there, she does anything she wants and mom babies and coddles her! Then when she comes back to our house, its a good day or 2 or 3 before she understands the rules we have in place here. I just want to strangle BM for not allowing her daughter to grow up! Thanks for listening.

Katie

kerryann67's picture

Submitted by kerryann67 on Wed, 03/16/2011 - 6:24pm

Katie, I agree that is friggin weird. However, she's their mother and you have no control. If you make yourself crazy over how she parents, you will be a loon by the time the kid hits her teens.

Trust me, the girl will grow out of it on her own and will be a big girl. My SS12 was wearing pull-ups until he was 11 because he had accidents, and would still call his dad like a tiny child when it was bedtime. He just suddenly stopped all that overnight on his own. It used to drive me nuts, but now there are all new things to drive me nuts.

k8tie's picture

Submitted by k8tie on Thu, 03/17/2011 - 3:38pm

Thanks kerry. It just bothers me how it will affect her as she gets older. I already know that BM lets her do and act however she wants and that plays a big role on how we discipline here. I guess its just 1 of many things about what BM lets her have/do/act etc. I have a hard time seeing how in the world BM doesnt have a problem with it!

Katie

kerryann67's picture

Submitted by kerryann67 on Thu, 03/17/2011 - 4:51pm

Katie, yeah I know what you mean. When my skid comes over, it's obvious he's been allowed to be rude and obnoxious because he's on a roll. I have often asked the older SK20 how it works at the other house, and she said her mom just lets him do what he wants. That is NOT good for a pre teen boy. However, there is just nothing I can do about that. the only thing I can do is set the rules for my house and lay down what behavior I will and won't tolerate. If that makes me the bad guy, so be it.

k8tie's picture

Submitted by k8tie on Thu, 03/17/2011 - 6:34pm

You are so right! I have learned to step back and let dad handle her when she is in "baby mode" but there are times when he isnt around and I have to deal with it. Ignoring it or sending her to her room works about 75% of the time, its the 25% that frustrates me. I do love her but (I hate saying this) I am totally embarrassed by the way she acts, talks etc, especially when I have company over or we are out shopping or something. I just want to crawl in a hole in the wall! I hate feeling embarrassed around her but thats how I feel.

Katie