These occassional family gatherings happen with my DH and his family. It is nice that at least you were invited. But every invitation does not have to be accepted. There are times when the hassle of going are not worth the bother.

This past summer my DH was invited to a baby shower/picnic for one of his grandaughters. The gathering was held at a local park. The guests consisted of his ex, his daughters and all their children and friends. None of these people have made any effort to visit us in over 5 years.

For me it did not seem worth the inconvenience of my finding someone to watch my dog, or to board him for the day. I was not going to take the dog and leave him to sit in the back of my van. I have not had contact with the people for years and the young children I once knew are teens and adults that are now strangers to me. I just said I was not traveling for 3 hours to spend the day in 90 degree heat with strangers.

DH spent almost 7 hours driving that day. He attended the party. Said the food consisted of sloppy joes which he hates. and some kind of chip dip in crock pots. It was a chance to see his kids and grandkids and people who are total strangers. He was not introduced but he thought the guy his grandaughter was hanging out with was probably the baby daddy. Since DH is retired it gave him something to do for the day. For me the ordeal of hours driving for this event was not worthwhile.
I prefered to stay home and do housework. I would have just mailed the gift card. After all it is not likely I will ever see or know the child.