You can now 6 months out. Start thinking about what you are going to do with her Christmas money..  SD is not going to see it..  trip to Santa workshop  5yo is ready for that, perfect time,  perfect time to make good memories.  And guess what that candy cane cane from Santa not SD. WHO

Sigh, I guess the drama is always part of step life, especially with teen girls.  Your situation sounds typical with the daddy issues, jealousy, child support remarks and stepmom blame.  You did the right thing to have your 5yo's picture removed.  I'd sincerely step back and disengage.  Be civil and polite to them but let your DH do the relationship.  Nothing you can do or say will change anything.  Focus on your 5yo.  They're late teens and apparently live distant.  They'll be in your life less and less as the years go by.  Deep breaths.  But I know aggravating this stuff is when you've tried to do your best.

It hurts so much to be treated badly when all we tried to do was our best. Unfortunately my experience of being a step parent is that we are useful when wanted and dirt on their shoes when they want to blame someone for the mess of their lives. 

I'm sorry that your step daughter has treated you this way. I bet half of it is performative for her tik tok followers. I've found my sd has no sense of nuance in her speech and possibly thinking. Everything is the worst and if something didn't happen once, it never happened at all...etc, etc. I'm hoping it is teen immaturity and she'lll grow out of it, but I'm not going to hold my breath. 

But disengage and completely focus on your bio. ANy attempts at making peace will be thrown in your face. Any reaching out will be turned into ammunition. 

In my case SD25 Feral Forger has called me all kinds of names through nasty texting so In blocked her. Her false narrative is the same at yours except I have no bio. Im accused by her of "taking away her dad, who hasnt been a dad to her since I came into their lives..." Ive been called a wh@re, a b!tch, told "I f@cking hate you"...etc.

Funny though because she only relates to her father through his money and help. Otherwise no time for him, no room for him. Shes created the relationship she wants and then criticises him for it "because its up to the parents to go after a relationship with their children". Such drivel. Theres a reason shes messed up, but its not him and its certainly not me.

Your SD will continue to put all the blame on you and your bio, so what you can to create a good life without her.

It's mind boggling that kids who have grown up with you there have fallen into the pit of toxic SDs who parrot the same pathetic lines straight out of the playbook. How disappointing. 

My SD and her horrible mother arranged to be interviewed on some YouTube channel, where for the millionth time the term "abandonment" was used, when nothing could be further from the truth. The rewriting of history is appalling. 

I love that you made them remove the photo of your child, and blocking is the way to go. At this stage, you might want to make this permanent (for your own peace and sanity) unless there ever appears to be real change and sincere apologies from the appropriately named dingleberry(ies).

 My DH also "didn't want to see it." Part of that was denial. But the hits kept coming so often that he had to set denial to the side. 

I released some of my anger on paper in a letter to SD that was never sent. When I looked back on it, I laughed at how mean it was, edited it some, and saved it. 

Focus on your family as SDs spew their self fulfilling prophecies, just as mine did.
How is your DH feeling about all of this besides being burned out? Is there a set time for a future visit? 

That TikTok account is your SD?  I have no words for the cringe. 

"You are such a nice person, Jackie. I get that you long for connections and good relations. It's the holidays, and you want your child to be part of a big family. You've been around the crazy for a long time, but it's been a hard year and you're feeling nostalgic for when things were better. BUT, you married a guy from a dysfunctional family who went on to have an equally dysfunctional first marriage, and there's a price for that. That means you will always have to be ruthlessly realistic and keep your boundaries high, wide, and thick."

 These are the simple facts you have to work with, Jackie. It's not a teen girl thing, or a  FIL & MIL are crazy thing; it's the reality, and it's permanent. You dropped your guard, allowed those poisoned, damaged girls access to your child, and look what happened.

I say this gently, but hope some of that anger is directed at yourself. It's your duty as a mom to keep ALL those people far away from your child. It's also your job to teach your daughter WHY in a loving, age-appropriate way, for two reasons: 1) So she can protect herself from the toxicity as she grows up; and 2) So her toxic relatives won't be able to alienate her from you - because they'll most certainly try.

It's an either- or proposition. You CAN have a high-quality life and raise a well-adjusted daughter, but only if you stay strong and keep those people away from your family. Allowing those girls access to your daughter is like exposing her to cancer.