From every other weekend to every weekend
I feel so just out of it. I honestly just don't know if I am selfish or what. In an early post I talked about how my SD had been in a mental facility for a while and was begging to come stay with us full time. So to make her feel better my DH said can we do every weekend. I honestly was not ok with this, but just feel like this is a no win situation. It has been a month now and I am ready to just put them both out. SD is 13 and barely cleans up behind herself, is louder than my twin toddlers, and just does as she pleases. This past week she cursed out a teacher, tore up a classroom, and her room at her mom house. DH had to get up and drive over there because she hide a razor and wouldn't give it to her mom. Yet, my DH gives no type of punishment or even addresses it further with her. I am a teacher myself and just can't stand that he is so passive about stuff like this. Now with the every weekend I never get a break on Fridays or time to refocus on Sundays before going back to the classroom. I understand that he is trying to help her issues, but this is just making me feel crazy. I just want some peace in my life. I am always waiting for her to flip out and he has to run over there to help. I am so over it all. I am praying for the Lord to help me with my feelings, but this is just so much harder than I ever anticipated. Any advice on how to deal would be greatly appreciated.
I would let DH know that is
I would let DH know that it is EOWE. He can see her outside of the home on the WE that she would normally be at BMs. He also needs the lesson that he is sacrificing time with his toddlers and wife and that your tolerance of it is extremely limited.
Prior relationship children do not take precidence over a spouse or younger kids.
Even that is too much. Let
Even that is too much. Let him know that it's EOWE (period).
Having him leave the house every weekend will just pile on the responsibility of twin toddlers to her.
Just be assertive and say no. Most men will get the immediate hint that it'd be better to see their kid every other weekend as they already do, rather than get a new child/spousal support bill + another court order.
True.
True.
This
It will take hard lessons for him to realize he is trading time with you and foddler to have sd with mental.issues there weekly. I sympathize. I had to leave a situatuon like this. Whrn it became clear that he traded the first childs schedule ..as a priority over our own kid, I think reality hit him.hard. we all need respite from stepkid with mental issues and since I wouldnt out me and our kid in that situation anymore, and he refused to get stepkid more help, I left and now he hardly sees our kid, his youngest. He chose the 1st over the second.
I'm a teacher as well and
I'm a teacher as well and just posted about having no weekends to myself. No even a few hours. While our situations are different they have some similarities.