CS is for SD not stupid old BM
CS, I am so tired of the text did you send child support? SD needs this and this and this. CS just is not enough any more...
While CS is being sent on time every month, and the full amount BM is always saying how she has no money. SD needs new shoes, new clothes, blah blah blah.
DH does buy SD clothes when she comes over, he also used to stop by the grocery and send food home with her. (this stopped when SD told us she never has them because BM and all her friends eat it all while she is in school) We do what SD needs outside of child support when she is at our house.
DH has also paid for her school lunch all year, and sends her home with a little cash here and there for fun stuff (movies with friends and what not. BM normally takes it for things they "need" ya know beer.)
There are 5 people living in the house hold. BM, her husband, their baby together, SD, and BM friend. (We think BM friend has her BF living there to but can't prove it.) So that is four other people besides SD living in this house. BM always says child support just doesn't cover half the bills, that she needs more they are struggling. That CS is to maintain half of SD needs which would be half of all bills of the house.
I know CS is based on income, but it is suppose to also be based on both parents supporting SD equally correct?
BM keeps saying she will just have to take us back to court. Would it matter that BM is feeding and paying for four other people besides SD to live there. DH income has not changed. BM's income went down when she quit her job to be a bartender part time. (she used to make 20+$ an hour at her old job).
Ignore her. When and if she
Ignore her. When and if she has a case to actually take for review, she can do so.
If Dad is paying the Co'd amount (hopefully it is the full amount per the guidelines/laws and going standard), and supplying the child what she needs also in his home, all is good.
Unfortunately your BM has proven she takes cash from SD and porks down any treat and extra food you try to send for the child. That is a shame, makes it hard for Dad knowing trying to provide a bit extra for his child doesn't actually go to the child. If BM and her many housemates need food they can do what other people with no income or having difficult times do and go to the food bank and/or apply for SNAP.
You know she is getting lunch from school five days a week when in session (do they do breakfast at school too) and you know she is well fed while with Dad. As sad as t is, if she is hungry at BM's, it is totally on BM. BM could be receiving assistance for her household if it within the income guidelines ... there is no need for the child to be hungry. If BM is choosing to spend cash elsewhere or spreading out what she legally gets for her family size, you can't fix that for SD. Dad can watch it closely though and if it begins to be Sd being neglected, he can report to child protective services.
First and immediately DH
First and immediately DH needs to stop submitting CS directly to BM and get it set up to deliver to the CSE office who will forward it to BM. That takes DH out of the money discussion business with BM. Second DH needs to pay CS and only CS which represents his contribution to the support of his daughter when she is not with him/you. If there are additional stipulated contributions by DH in the Custody/Visitation/Support order then DH of course needs to pay those but not one penny more or less than is specifically addressed in the CO. DH should support his child but not be BM's beck and call boy or ATM.
IMHO of course.
Good luck.
If she voluntarily reduced
If she voluntarily reduced her income, they can calculate CS based off her old wage/whatever wage she could realistically get if she were gainfully employed at her skill level. A parent can't just cut down their hours to raise/lower CS.
Let her take you to court and let her explain why her income was halved. A judge isn't going to be sympathetic to this.
We used to deal with this with BM. She wasn't working, and DH wasn't making a lot so CS was pretty low. However, DH bought whatever the boys needed, even going so far as to give BM grocery money when her SNAP got cut down. One of DH's final straws with her was when she said she needed money for meds and gas to take YSS to the doctor. In all, it would have been maybe $30. In literally the next breath, BM was asking DH if he liked her new belly button piercing, lifting her den mom shirt and all to show it off. The woman isn't working and can't afford gas to get her kid to the doctor, but can get herself a belly button ring?! I think I turned 50 shades of red hot after that.
So, ignore her unless she takes you to court. Keep doing what you're doing. You are doing what needs to be done; she's just blowing smoke and hoping you all cave in to her demands out of fear.
BM has 6 other people living
BM has 6 other people living with her. They all pay less than $200/month. When they went to court Dh lawyer brought up the other family living there contributing to the mortgage and BM said they "didn't count because they lived in the basement". Because none of them were on the title/loan a note was made, but when dh got his court papers that said what he was supposed to pay it said in the break-down of both incomes that she was essentially paying the entire mortgage by herself. The ENTIRE mortgage was included in her percentage. The paperwork proved that neither parent had a whole lot of money left over at the end of the month. Despite this, they took the total gross income from both parties W2's and deducted "costs of raising a child" based on the income. Our state is nuts. The amount they came up with for Dh literally doesn't leave him any money for groceries or utilities once subtracted from the total on the court order, but they don't care.