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Continuation of SS Threatening BM

Bettysmith00's picture

I posted a few days ago(see last post) at a dr appointment SS14 Threatened BM if she did not stop nagging him he was going to punch her. At the time of the appointment DH did not say anything to SS14. When SS14 came over DH told SS14 that's not Appropriate to say. SS14 response was he did not care. SS14 went on to say if ANYONE is rude to him he's going to be rude back and possibly punch them he does not care who they are. Right after SS14 said this DH got a work call and it was dropped. Your take on this one??

simifan's picture

Your DH is failing terribly as a parent. He is also failing to protect you. What is going to happen when SS perceives you are "rude". Will you get punched? 

Bettysmith00's picture

So the chance he sees me as "rude" is slim. I even refuse to go on vacation with SS. Honestly I'm hoping SS14 does punch someone as he needs the shit beat out of him. The problem is SS14 is not only a coward but a smart one. SS14 is WAY more likely to punch an adult than a peer. Not because he gets along with peers BUT SS14 knows if he hits a peer they will beat the crap out of him. SS14 also knows legally an adult can't punch him back

Stepdrama2020's picture

Sounds like the lil shit will consider anything or anybody rude if he wants to start. So do not feel like you cannot be a target.

Whats up with your DH?  Any half decent parent wouldve addressed this violent seeking behavior ASAP. Your DH may keep his head in the sand, but will have to come up for air to bail this lil terror out of juvy one day.

 

 

 

Bettysmith00's picture

Does not help BM is a TOTAL Enabler and makes excuses for her poor baby boy. Gag..In reality once SS14 turns 18 he will no longer be under the protection of shit worthless family court or BM. If SS14 takes a swing at someone as an adult he will end up in jail and nothing BM or DH can do about it and DH will no longer be responsible for what SS14 does

Bettysmith00's picture

Does not help BM is a TOTAL Enabler and makes excuses for her poor baby boy. Gag..In reality once SS14 turns 18 he will no longer be under the protection of shit worthless family court or BM. If SS14 takes a swing at someone as an adult he will end up in jail and nothing BM or DH can do about it and DH will no longer be responsible for what SS14 does

notarelative's picture

 SS14 also knows legally an adult can't punch him back

SS may be misinformed. He's 14. If he physically attacks someone, they have the right of self defense even if they are an adult.  He does not get a free punch.

SS also needs to understand that if he hits someone, whether a child or an adult, he can be criminally charged if he throws the first punch. 

There was a 14 year old here that started a fight at school and kept saying she would not be punished as she had a behavior IEP. Family court judge didn't agree. 

Bettysmith00's picture

This is the "excuse" BM uses whenever SS14 does ANY Delinquent behavior. BM will say "it's not SS14 fault he has a mental illness". I personally call BS. SS14 may have a "mental illness" BUT I fully believe it's from being Coddled and never held responsible for his behavior. Not sure what state you live in BUT our family court system does not see it that way. I even asked a person who works for CPS what I should do if SS14 ever came after me. Their response was to "flee" or lock myself in a room and call 911. regardless if SS14 came at me first if I hit him back the family court would not be happy as SS14 has been diagnosed with a mental illness AND I'm the adult and should know how to defuse the situation. If BM Chose and she would to press charges I could be in a Heap of trouble with the law. 

notarelative's picture

Mental illness is not a get out of jail free card. The jails and prisons in the US have lots of mentally ill prisoners. The legal standard is the McNaughton rule and that is very hard to meet. 

DH needs to talk to his son about the reality of what happens when you attack someone. Yes, fleeing, if you can, is preferred, but if you can't the adult is allowed self defense to get away. Reasonable force is allowed. You couldn't beat him repeatedly, but you use some force to push him away.  SS needs to realize that an adult he hits can press charges. 

I don't know where you live, but DH, SS, and BM need to understand that juveniles can be waved out of family court. Age varies by state and offense, but it is as young as 13 in some states. 
https://www.ojjdp.gov/ojstatbb/structure_process/qa04110.asp?qaDate=2011...

CLove's picture

She normally comes off as "angelic" with a sing song high voice.

But shes told me stories of people pushing her and then they end up on the floor.

And then her sister "made her angry" so she popped her hand with a shoe and sprained the thumb.

Do not understimate the violence potential.

nappisan's picture

sounds like the little shit needs to be beaten up.  a couple of years ago when SS was 12,, he used to spit on people if they annoyed him or did something that took the attention off him,, he would even spit at DH.  Well one day when DH was out ,, the little brat decided to spit on my son who was 17 at the time....big mistake,,,,i turned my back while my son held the brat on the ground and spat the biggest lewgy on the kids face.  The SS cried and cried but never did it again 

justmakingthebest's picture

I said it before and I will say it again. I would be PISSED at my husband for not handling this. This boy will become a woman beater one day.