Can you call the police on BM if.........
I have been dealing with personlity disorder driven BM for over a year now. Here is a general overview for those of you out there that haven't heard my story before.
In the last year crazy BM has:
-Called SO bawling and begging him to come back serveral times.
-Sent SO countless texts in regards to them getting back together which he replied everytime with a tactful no.
-Called SO's mom on several occasions bawling and begging her to talk SO into going back to her.
-Has called SO bawling asking him not to let me move in.
-Has had her father call SO and ask him to get back together with her.
-Has had her father call SO to ask him not to let me move in.
-Has sat outside the house at 3 am.
-Has shown up at our house when both SO and I were at work. This was witnessed by our neighbor.
-After she was told to stay away from my BD(6), showed up at the school the both her daughter and my daughter attend to talk with my daughter. This was witnessed by the neighbor girl who stated that the interaction seemed strange and made her feel uncomfortable.
-Has called CPS and filed false allegations of abuse against SO.
-Has stalked SO.
-Has played mind games with her and SO's BD(6) i.e. mommy and daddy will get married again if daddy and her aren't getting along and mommy is really sad right now because daddy and her aren't married anymore. There has been more than just that said.
-Called SO and told him that she was terminally ill.
The list can go on but I'm sure that you're getting the general idea here. So here's my question. The CPS thing is the most recent BS the Bm has pulled. Since then we have tried to go to a non-contact email only relationship with BM. In email she has agreed to it but she just can't quite grasp the concept of it. SO sent her an email explaining how it is supposed to work as far as her conacting him and she basically told him thanks and it's all very comical. She is only supposed to call unless it's an emergency and text if there is a scheduling issue or if the kids want to chat with him.
Question:
Now that we have BM agreeing to the email contact only, can we call the police the next time she violates it? I know it's not a court document but with everything else that we have, like the stalking, we should be able to contact them and show them the evidence. From there they would get in contact with her, and maybe she would realize that what she is doing is against the law.
I'm at a loss. I just want her to go away. Please any sort of advise would be nice.
We've had our fair share of
We've had our fair share of these same issues! My DH's ex-wife used to call him crying and begging for him to "dump" me (honey, we aren't dating, we're MARRIED) and take her back. She even went as far as to tell SD that "mommy and daddy can't be married because daddy is married to step-mommy" and "daddy broke my heart" and "mommy is going to die of a broken heart". We actually contacted the Atty General about all of this and they basically told us there isn't anything that can be done when it comes to "brainwashing" or "verbal bashing" of the other parent, etc. They encouraged us to document everything of course and send any communications or requests in writing via certified mail (like your email request, we would have not only verbally told BM but sent her a certified letter explaining it all) and keep copies of it all. I would imagine if the problem persists you could push it with a judge and in your case it seems like she might be a danger to herself, you, your family, and her child. I don't know that the police would do anything because there isn't an actual CO but that's where I'd start - trying to get some kind of CO in place if possible! We've warned BM that if she doesn't shut her damn mouth and quit pulling the BS she's pulling she'll end up before a judge!
If you send her a certified
If you send her a certified return reciept letter to cease ans desist making contact with YOUR daughter and making stops by your house, and she keeps doing those things, you can easily get a protective order and then you can have her arrested if she violates that order.
Ignore the calling and texting. Just ignore it. Change your cell numbers. Don't give them out. Period. If you have an iPhone you can get an app that gives you a seperate number for her to call and text, and you can disable her from calling or texting.
That's what we had to do with
That's what we had to do with the phone numbers. BM would text/call ME because DH would never answer her calls. I got tired of her BS so I blocked her through my provider, and we gave her the house phone number. She doesn't even have DH's cell number because she'll harass the crap out of him! DH's CO states that CP and NCP must provide one another with a 'contact number' but it doesn't specify which one, or how many so all she gets is the house phone and that's all she needs.
The best route to take right
The best route to take right now is to have her served with a trespass warning. This way, she cannot come within so many feet of your home. If she does, she can be arrested. As far as the calls and such, Echo is right on.
Yup. I have no advice for
Yup. I have no advice for you, except that I feel your pain. The BM in my case is also telling my SD5 that "mommy is so sad because daddy broke up with her" then my SD talks to my DH on the phone and says "you made mommy soooooooo sad! How could you make mommy sad by breaking up with her?" Its sick, and I can see it getting worse the years to come. I do not understand how an adult can tell a CHILD things like that... since when did children become sounding boards?! Why wont this "woman" let her young daughter just be a KID?! Oh, and this child was 3 when they officially divorced, and my DH had only lived with the BM for maybe 6 months since she was born (one of those one night stand, got knocked up type of situations, and my DH tried to do the right thing and was with her). Makes me sick.