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birth mothers on pedestals

SugarSpice's picture

Submitted by SugarSpice on Wed, 09/14/2016 - 2:29pm

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this is an interesting commentary on how bms are placed on pedestals in our society. bm is not always the best place for a child. i feel sorry for this young man. perhaps bm just wants the cs money.

we see bms using child support for boob jobs. in my case bm used cs money to feather nest with new house for her new husband. (she slept with a married man who divorced his wife to marry her.) on a good note karma hit her and after 20 the man cheated on her.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKfm723mISo

SugarSpice's picture

Submitted by SugarSpice on Wed, 09/14/2016 - 2:31pm

it is hard to tell the real circumstances in a short video, but clearly the young man does not want to stay with birth mother.

ldvilen's picture

Submitted by ldvilen on Wed, 09/14/2016 - 3:20pm

This is an interesting comment and wide open to interpretation. On the one hand, being a mom is certainly special--you carry a child for months before it is even born and that creates a unique bond, and I agree for the most part, no one will ever love you like your natural mother.

On the other hand, when I was in my 20s, I remember I worked with several women who were divorced with children and commemorated over and over about how bad they had it. It certainly wasn’t and is not easy being divorced with children, but even back then I remember thinking these women have a house/home and the children, and they get child support from their ex or possibly federal/state aid. The ex-husband, on the other hand, is living in a cheap apt. or with relatives and pretty much at the will of his ex-wife when it came to seeing his own children, just as much his flesh and blood as hers.

Fast forward many years, and just a few hours ago I saw a show where this woman moved out on her husband “Ninja style,” she called it, and she and her girlfriends were all slapping each other on the back about how coy and clever she was to just up and leave (this was not an abuse situation, which is entirely different). She moved into a rental home, and filed for divorce, and this all came as an absolute shock to her husband. The thought from all of these women was then how her husband was a jerk for not just accepting it and actually thinking he could get her back somehow, and the thought from all of these women was that we were all supposed to agree with them. Not me.

I actually felt sorry for the guy. If the situation were reversed--if the husband moved out on his wife Ninja style, took the kids, etc., there would be no doubt in any minds what a huge jerk the husband was and how dare he, etc. But, because it was bio-mom doing it instead of bio-dad, then it is different? Being a mom is special beyond belief, but I agree the double-standard has always bothered me. Divorced mom seems to carry a heroine status, and maybe it should. But, on the other hand, divorced dad is almost seen as being synonymous with deadbeat dad. This should not be the case.