Are we out of line?
This year DH gets the skids for Halloween. Halloween also falls during Elk Season so its kind of throws a wrench in DH's hunting time. DH's plan states that the skids are to go back to BM at 11am the day after Halloween. DH is taking my son up hunting and will miss the morning hunt if he cannot drop the skids off until 11am. So, DH asked BM if she would take the kids earlier, he offered either around 9pm Halloween night or early in the morning the day after Halloween. BM said that he only thing she would agree to is taking the skids at 7pm Halloween night so that she could talk the kids trick-or-treating too;(the problem is that this would leave only a short amount of time for us to trick-or-treat with the kids because it doesn't even get dark until after 6pm.
SO, DH said NO, if that was all she would agree to then they will just follow the parenting plan; (which of course means that my son and DH will miss out on hunting time because BM is a bi**h.)
So my question is, are we being unreasonable? Is there some other solution that I'm just not seeing?
I think its a good thing if DH compromises with BM which means he will never get 100% of what he wants, but I think that she was being unreasonable by virtually trying to take DH's Halloween.
I told DH that he should try to find someone (like his cousin) to take the skids the morning after Halloween and meet BM to drop them off so that BM won't be allowed to interfere with our plans.
I absolutely hate the idea of her thinking that she got one over on us and successfully ruined our plans (which is exactly what she wants to do).
So to me the solution would be to find someone to take them and to meet BM.... that way we still get to leave early and BM still does not get her way!
That sounds like...
That sounds like a perfect plan...that way she can get her kids when she is supposed to get them and your DH and son can spend their quality time together. Don't let the BM ruin your weekend plans. Good luck!
Reality is always controlled by the people who are most insane.
~Dogbert
Thats what I would do, find
Thats what I would do, find someone to take the kids at 11am.
That doesn't sound unreasonable
at all. I'm sure you always have to compromise when things do go according to BM's schedule but when the roles are reversed it's there way or the highway.
My skids BM expects us to drop everything when she needs to pick/drop off earlier or later, but when we expect the favour returned it's always bad luck, so we don't bother asking her anymore cause we know the answer and usually get someone like MIL to look after them and then BM is pissed cause she has to drive to MIL place to pick up the skids as we wont be dropping them off at her front door.
Enjoy your weekend, don't let an immature person get to you, she's not worth it.
Options
Don't let BM ruin things for your DH and son - I think the best option is the one you mentioned which is to find a relative to leave skids with. That is perfectly reasonable and people do it all the time. If BM has a problem with that then she can pick up the kids herself Halloween night at 9. You don't want to count on her being there sat morning she could stand you up just to spite you all. Take care and i hope everything works out for you guys.
well.....
What happened? Did your men go hunting? Please update us.
YES!!
DH dropped the kids off with his cousin Saturday morning at 6am and my kids and DH and I all headed up for Elk Hunting. We had an awesome weekend! Trick-or-treating with all four kids (my two + two skids) the night before was great, all of the kids had a wonderful time, running from house to house gathering up TONS of candy, drinking hot coco while DH and I sipped on Baileys and coffee along the way.
It felt great that we found a way around BM's attempt to put a wrench in our plans, I'm sure this fact really bothered her.... as immature as it is, that alone made me smile all weekend long!