All I want is to sleep with my DH all night...
My DH just stopped sleeping in my 6 yr old SS's bed with him when he's with us (every other weekend, every Tuesday). When SS was here, I could just plan on not sleeping with my DH.
Now, he's stopped sleeping all night with SS. HOWEVER, he goes into SS's room with him at night, wait until he falls asleep, then comes to our room. Then, SS comes in at about 5 or 6am, DH goes to his room with him, where he remains until morning. Or, like tonight, SS just came in,and DH left our bed. It's 2:15 - I don't know if he's coming back to our bed or not.
DH may as well just keep sleeping all night with SS. By the time SS decides he's ready for bed at 10pm, DH is in there about 45 mins until SS goes to sleep. By the time he gets to our room, I'm asleep. And, when I wake up, he's already gone.
I am SO angry right now!! I really just want to go into SS's room and get my damn husband! I am really tired of this crap.
Am I overreacting?
It sounds like he is weaning
It sounds like he is weaning him off though. You said he 'just' stopped sleeping with him.
I agree that 6 is pretty old for the behaviour you describe but since it has been a habit it will take a little while to break it and it sounds like your dh is taking steps to do so. He just needs to continue moving forward.
This sounds really common
This sounds really common around here. I'm beginning to wonder if maybe the fact that the kids' parents are separated gives them some kind of separation anxiety that really manifests itself at night when they're alone in bed. I'd like to see a study on that.
My gut is to say what I always say though, it's okay to tuck little Jimmy in but then it's time for the adults to go to bed alone. If ONCE in a blue moon little Jimmy has a HORRIBLE nightmare it's okay for Daddy/Mommy to go back in the room and calm him down, but after that it's back to bed for everyone. And the adults' bedroom door stays locked and Jimmy can come in when Daddy opens the Master BR door and says "good morning".
I'm out on all that sleeping in the same bed shit. My exGF did it with her 9 year old. That's just raising titty-babies is all that's doing.
He stays with the 6 year old
:jawdrop: He stays with the 6 year old until he falls asleep!!! talk about manipulating, spoiling and def. not having adult time....
Do you have any kids of your own? if you do (or if you don't) ask him how would he feel if you had to stay with your child EVERY NIGHT until he/she fell asleep.
This is so absurd, parents nowadays do anything their kids want them to do .... :?
Not only do i know how
Not only do i know how frusterating this is,,,,i also know how it disrupts EVERYONE"S sleep and cuts out a lot of the time that i know I, and probably most other women here really love! Quiet time alone with your bf or dh! It's a huge bummer to miss out on this time that should be yours. I totally agree that in some cases, Nightmares, illness or any other rare occasions it's ok to go to your children, maybe spend sometime with them, calming them down and assuring them every thing's ok, but then it's time to come back to bed!! and also to come back to bed alone! My SD6 was sleeping in bed with dad every night until i came along and let him know i wanted to stay the night, but i felt uncomfortable sleeping in a bed with his 6yrold child! he was able to slowly, and i mean slowly, get her to at least start off in her own bed. I was sure to encourage him and applaud his efforts. It was really hard for him and she put up quite a fight every night! However she is waking up every night, and whinnng and calling out to him, and he gets up and goes in there, which wakes everyone up....and she ends up in the bed with us!! So although i wake up with him next to me, i'm often smashed up against the wall with an elbow in my face because lets face it, even a king sized bed isn't big enough for two adults and a very tall, (or short i'd imagine!) 6 year old! So stick with it stop and chat! Back your man up, encourage him, maybe set goals for him?! Anything to make sure he stays on the right path, it is important to everyone that he gets SS sleeping in his room by himself for the whole night! Just stand your ground and don't let SS end up in your bed!!
Thanks for all of the
Thanks for all of the responses. I ended up going into SS's room to get DH. He came back to our bed, and we ended up having a fight about it. He doesn't understand why it's such a big deal to me, and that he's trying to get SS to sleep on his own. SS then got up AGAIN about 15 mins later, DH went to SS's room to get him back in bed, but then he came right back.
I really can't wait to begin seeing the counselor on Tuesday. I really just want DH to hear some of these things from a professional. Because, as it stands right now, he believes I'm being unreasonable.
Next time he leaves you alone
Next time he leaves you alone in bed, let him walk in on you playing with yourself. ( honestly)
I bet he will not want to miss out on that maybe?
Just a lil advice....
Better bet is to say "I'm
Better bet is to say "I'm going to bed at 10 o'clock and locking the door whether you're in this room or not. If you then walk out that door I'm locking it behind you and getting some sleep. I will not reopen it for you. If I end up sleeping alone too often I'm going to realize that there's no point in living with someone. I may come visit during the day. I may not."