Never been sure my husband is the biological father of my stepsons
My husband and I have 2 children together. He had twins with his ex. She conceived when they were separated since they were an on and off type of relationship. My husband had a good heart although he’s told me that he’s not sure he’s the biological father of the twins he still doesn’t want to know because he’s raised them as his own.
The twins are extremely spoiled and will not do chores at our house they are 10 years old and will not even make their own bed or lift a finger around here. My husband gets upset at me for saying they should have chores he’s scared they go complain and then they won’t come here. We’ve had a lot of problems between us for issues arising from the twins behavior. They go and tell lies about our home. Since my husband in the past told them they had to have good grades and good behavior to earn stuff/rewards the twins opted for crying that we were mean and treated them horribly. Instead they cried so much and complained so much the ex filed for legal sole custody. The irony is the grandma and an aunt of the twins take them over all the time have practically raised them and continue too while the ex collects the hard earned money my husband makes in a hefty child support Bill.
The grandma and aunt even sponsor all their activities clothes and entertainment for them since they can afford too there were no other children in that house. I feel extremely frustrated that we have to lay her. We are barely making ends meet. We are low-income. It’s really hurting us that the child support is so high. What makes matters the worst is that our 2 kids go without so that the twins feast and have the best of everything. They’re always coming back here saying what stuff they got and where they went while we can barely afford to take our 2 kids to places like parks that are free. We don’t have any date nights because we can’t afford child care.
The worst of all these sacrifices is that we don’t know if the twins are biologically my husbands. I get really frustrated by this. What if by not taking action on a DNA test he’s depriving them
Of meeting their real father. I feel like my husbands lack of iteration in knowing is hurting our family too much to the point where I don’t know if I can live my life like this. His ex is a known easy woman. She told my husband herself that she was sleeping with multiple men during their separations. I don’t understand why my husband will not find out once and for all of they are his or not. The twins treat us with disrespect and come to our home to do whatever they want because my husband allows it for fear of the ex not taking them away completely. Should I give him an ultimatum ? What can I do, options?
So... in that case....
So... in that case.... collect some hair from each kid and from your DH and send it all in for testing. If it turns our that your DH is not the BioDad .... then suggest that he sue the crap out of BM for lying to him and recover as much of the money as he can that she stuck him for through her extortionist use of CS. No need to give up his official and legal relationship with the kids but... I for sure would butcher the BM in court, socially, financially and in any other way I could think of.... and I would have fun doing it. }:)
Rags you are absolutely
Rags you are absolutely correct!! Thanks for your feedback!! I just don’t know how I can collect their hair . My husband won’t support me in doing a DNA so he won’t help me get that hair sample I need.
If you think a home sent in
If you think a home sent in sample will hold up in court, you are wrong. A test that would be useable in court must be a lab that is court approved and sample taken by the lab tech.
But as I stated below even a proper DNA will not automatically clear your DH of being the legal father.
As with much of Rags' advice
As with much of Rags' advice on this site, it panders to exactly what OP wants to hear and is factually incorrect and has no basis in reality.
No, you cannot sue BM for lying and recover your CS. Your DH is the legal father and will be on the hook for CS until 18 or whatever the limit for your state is.
No, you will not "have fun" suing her and wasting your already limited money on legal fees trying to "butcher her in court" and losing all of that money.
No, you will not be able to affect the BM socially or financially. Based on your other post titled "My in-laws have disowned my hisband and our family" it sounds like you and your kids have already been socially and financially excluded by your DHs family. You guys doing anything to emotionally damage the skids by disproving paternity will only ostracize you further.
I know Rags gives advice that makes you feel validated and warm and fuzzy inside but a quick Google search and, honestly, just thinking about it for more than 5 seconds, will let you know that he spews crap, with astonishing regularity. Zero parts of his post will actually help you.
Please go to therapy to work through some of your emotions and resentment towards BM and the skids and your husband's family. If you are barely making ends meet, consider getting your degree if you don't already have one. Leave the raising and care of the skids completely to your husband. Disengage from them. If he talks to you about them respond with things like "Thats nice" and change the subject. You can't change other people you can only change yourself.
Good luck.
I suppose it comes down to
I suppose it comes down to whether or not you want to be BM's victim or take some control which may mean just not tolerating her crap unconfronted. The odds of coming out of any family court session feeling anything but nauseous and in need of a hot shower to clean the skeeve is slim. Even when we have won in court against my SKid's SpermClan... and we never lost.... we have always felt that the oversight of the process was done by some bottom 10%er moron of the legal profession. It was not until we found our no BS killer shark attorney that we significantly improved the post legal action feelings we had. Even though we won before we found him.
In the 16 years we lived under a CO and had to regularly bare the idiot asses of the SpermClan in court, publicly, socially and financially there was an underlying tension constantly. So... going all in on destruction of the toxic blended family opposition is not without its consequences.
That said... yes... I learned to enjoy it very much. I was protecting my family and the best interests of my Skid from the idiocy of the toothless shallow and polluted end of his gene pool.
The key is extensive documentation, having a very good killer attorney, tolerating no crap from the opposition and keeping the facts front, center and continuously communicated to keep the opposition boxed in. The beauty of fact is that the truth is not a risky thing to continuously communicate to the Skid (in an age appropriate manner), the community, the courts, ect, etc, etc.....
Though some have commented that there is nothing you can do regarding the paternity fraud that BM has potentially perpetrated against your DH and family it can be taken to civil court. It isnt easy, the outcomes are uncertain at best, and recovery of money is rare. However, what that legal action does is expose the lying breeder for what they are and puts the victim on a platform for doing what is in there power to hold the criminal responsible and let everyone know the facts of their depravity.
The first step in taking some control is determining paternity. And though not necessarily presentable in court... a retail DNA test can certainly determine if BM is in fact perpetrating fraud against your DH and family. If confirmed by that test then working with a no BS attorney to map the strategy and go after BM (if it makes sense) can be the next step. If the facts are there your attorney should be able to motivate a paternity test through a certified lab.
I for one would want to know were I you or your DH.
As for the rest of the family and their behavior....... the facts continuously rubbed in their faces tend to work wonders in minimizing their crap just as rubbing BM's nose in her own stench beats being her compliant victim. Most importantly the facts when communicated sensitively and effectively to a child who is a victim of a toxic parent, PAS, etc.... can be a tool for protecting that child and for preparing them to be able to protect themselves from the toxic manipulations of a toxic, manipulative, and shallow portion of their gene pool as adults.
At least in my experience.
I periodically will be accused of "pandering" to a poster. What I do is comment on the situation as presented. Since the perspective of the opposition is not presented I comment on the assumption that what the poster says is the information available. Which is exactly what is available.
So... good luck.
So for people who can "barely
So for people who can "barely afford to take our 2 kids to places like parks that are free" - you suggest hiring a killer attorney. Worthless advice.
For people who are "barely making ends meet" you suggest launching a civil case against the BM where recovery of money is rare. Worthless advice.
For people whose relatives are already keeping them at arms length you suggest rubbing the fact that the skids aren't DHs biological children in their faces. As if antagonizing people who barely tolerate you isn't going to make the family back even farther away and damage the grandparents relationship with OP and her children even more. Worthless advice.
Bravo Rags. Your excellent counsel will have OP below the poverty line and ostracized from DHs family in no time. Nothing you say is even remotely helpful or actually applicable to OP.
Considering the OP, her DH,
Considering the OP, her DH, and their children are already ostracized by her ILs and the consistent victim of a toxic characterless BM I propose taking action rather than remain her compliant victim and letting the ILs continue unconfronted.
How is the problem solved from you perspective? How is spending money on counseling with a similar success rate to legal action any different than spending it on an attorney and direct action from a cost perspective? Or is the status quo good enough?
I for one tend to ere in the direct action direction.
Whether biologically or not,
Whether biologically or not, your DH is still the children's legal father. He is still responsible for these kids and for supporting them.
You've written as if a DNA would just simply cure all your problems. It will not. And it matters not if grandparents and aunts over indulge the twins with materialistic items and going and doing things.
Your husband being low income can not be paying lots in CS, as CS is based on income. After ten years of being legal father and willingly accepting it as fact, short of another man coming in and adopting the twins, your DH is still going to have to pay CS even if a DNA shows non-biological father.
The choice to have a DNA is your DH's choice to make, not yours. I just get the sense from your post that you believe if a DNA test shows DH isn't biological father, he can and will just send them back to BM, never see nor deal with them again and be able to be finished with CS. I sincerely doubt things go that way.
Before you open that can of worms, I would suggest your DH speak with a lawyer and learn where he legally would be if a DNA test showed negative.
He has recognized and acknowledged this kids as his own in the eyes of the law. BM never lied, she admitted she had other partners , yet your DH still did not seek DNA.
He was with her for 4 years
He was with her for 4 years after the twins were born she held it in secret that when they were on and off she slept around. She confessed it to my husband 4 years after their birth that was the main reason he left her once and for all. In addition before her confession she was seeing another guy so cheating on him too and he found out. She’s not a mother that wants her kids. She gives them over to the grandma and aunt all the time everyday. The kids spend their days with their relatives instead of the biological mother. The mother took my husband to court for money not because she needs it for the kids but for herself. Kids always tell us what their grandma and aunt do for them not once do they mention their mother. My husband just doesn’t want to be crushed to know if they’re not his and neither does he want to hurt the kids. Is it fair to me or our boys? If they have another father by all means they have a right to know that. If that’s the case that father needs to step up and pay the support my husband has been. Our court systems are not fair. They do not go by income only there’s a lot of factors and typically the guy gets screwed over every time.
Please look-up the difference
Please look-up the difference between natural and legal father. This is a link on your state and parentage you might find helpful afterwards.
http://www.courts.ca.gov/1202.htm click around and read the different sections/pages.
No where will you find the court is concerned on what yours, mine or anyone else's opinion or feelings of "fair" are. Nor will you, as the second wife, nor your newest children be considered 'special' over and above the rights of the older child.
I am not unsympathetic to your issue nor your feelings. All I am trying to show you is that what you are wanting is not as simple nor easy. As the site explains, legal parentage can be complicated. If your DH intends to pursue this, he needs to first talk to a lawyer.
I understand. Thank you for
I understand. Thank you for your time and feedback.
This should have been done years ago.
Everyone needs to know at this point. These kids may not be related to your own children or DH. His ex may have completely frauded all of you. As the laws stand he will be the legal father until age 18. He should have established paternity right after they are born. A man has usually a 1-2 years to establish paternity in most states. After that unless he fights it his name is going to be on the birth certificate. Doesn't matter if they find the real bio father afterwards, it won't change a thing regarding child support or birth cert. changes. OP I would order the kit, and do it from their hair, tooth brush, eating utensils etc. At least if you find out they aren't his kids, you will be able to tell your kids the truth when they're older.
I am sorry that you are in
I am sorry that you are in this situation but there is little that you can do about it except to learn to accept it. Being a step parent is one big lesson in learning to accept the things we have no control over.
Your stepsons genes are irrelevant at this point in time. You need to work on accepting this fact or it will continue to plague you. Who BM slept with or how many people BM slept with is irrelevant. Your husband accepted these children as his own and even if he wanted to check their paternity and try to give up his rights it is not that easy a process. When he accepted them he also accepted the responsibility to help raise them, part of that (a court has deemed) is paying child support. These are not new facts for you. Learning to accept them in some level will help you to maintain some sort of sanity.
Thank you for taking the time
Thank you for taking the time to reply to me. You’re right not much that I can do and it’s a challenge to handle this situation.
It sounds like you knew about
It sounds like you knew about the situation w/the twins before you married him and accepted it then. You even had kids w/him fully knowing that your children may not be genetic siblings w/his. What changed? Their preteen attitudes? Seeing them get more than your kids? You say you're low income, was DH ever a high wage earner?
An old school saying is that "You made your bed now you get to lay in it." It seems to apply here since you went into the situation w/your eyes open.
As pointed out by other posters, even if DH is not genetically their father it would be nearly impossible to stop CS this late in the game especially since he's not contesting anything. They are his kids regardless of their DNA and so far it has not been proved that he's not the father. You can go behind everyones back and get a test done but legally it won't change a thing. All it will do is p*ss everyone off and you may get the status of ex wife #2.
I’m going to go at this from
I’m going to go at this from a different angle, because I don’t think the OP is necessarily that jealous or resentful. I think she actually has some genuine concerns and even a much bigger question. That question is: Why is it that BM can do whatever she wants, cohabitate with different men during her marriage to her husband, for example, have children of questionable parentage, and yet BM gets away with it scott-free?
Now, I know that pretty much unequivocally a state sees any children that are born during a marriage to be of the married partners regardless. And, there are good reasons for that, that are obvious; the main one being to assure that children are not dragged into court unnecessarily and subjected to unnecessary labels or humiliation. Like an acquaintance of mine once said, you always know who the mother is, but dad, well. . . not always. So, once a man is married, DNA testing is pretty much worthless. Any kids the woman has during that time, are going to be labeled as his and his responsibility regardless.
Anyway, I get that the court system has a right to say married dad at the time is dad and here is how much child support you have to pay. I get that, and yes, unfortunately, since most states just take yea- much percentage of dad’s salary depending, if you marry this man and go on to have children with him, it could indeed wind up where you and your husband’s children do with less. That is the nature of the court-system beast. The court system, for the most part, is only interested in children of divorce in this sense. BUT, I don’t think for the OP to be upset with BM getting away with a near crime is out of line.
Yes, if the OP wants to stay married to her DH, she will have to learn that his children have the power of the courts behind them, while her children with DH do not. However, at what point are BMs held accountable for PAS’ing their kids, having children with other men and then claiming they are fathered by the man they are currently married to, and so on? I kind of think this is what the OP is really trying to get at—the absolute unfairness of the situation. Is she jealous or resentful? Not really. Maybe she is just saying, “What the H-! Here I am, honestly married to my DH, and I have two children with him, and I’m having to suffer financially. . . Meanwhile, BM cheated on him and these kids may not even be his, and yet she and her kids get a big pay day.” She does have a point.
Anyway, I agree there is a difference between having a well-founded point vs. reality, especially when it comes to step-parenting. As difficult as it may be, I’d advise the OP to let it go and concentrate the best she can on her marriage and her children, and remember that if she stays married to her DH, at least her children will have the benefit of having mom and dad together, and that is priceless. You cannot put a pay day amount on that.
On the other hand, I do also wonder at what point are BMs going to be held accountable for PAS’ing their kids, having children with other men and then claiming they are fathered by the man they are currently married to, and so on? BM basically commits a crime, but she is never held accountable for the sake of the child? Makes sense, or maybe not. I agree that in these types of cases, it is almost impossible to drag BM’s name through the mud without dragging the child’s too. But, is that reason enough, or is there another way? I don't know, but I still think these are legitimate questions.
Yep. I completely agree.
Yep. I completely agree.
'I do also wonder at what
'I do also wonder at what point are BMs going to be held accountable'
Never - the reason is given in the name of what is 'best for the children'. But which children? Our BM just does what she likes puts a finger up to the courts (is not paying the CS she is due to pay to DH) and it would cost us money to get this measly amount of cs because she ignores it and we would have to take her to court to get it. Is it worth it? We don't even know because she refuses to let us know when the older SD began working (and came off the CS balance) she just refuses... yet it is legally her responsibility to tell us.
BM's can do what they like. If this were a man he would be severely punished by the courts and labelled a 'dead beat dad' by society. She is a dead beat mom and everyone thinks it's ok, even some who post on here. Double standards.
Right! BM need to be held
Right! BM need to be held accountable as well!
Really?! So, in America if
Really?!
So, in America if you 'accept' children as your own on the basis that you believe they are yours biologically and later discover they are not, you are STILL on the hook for child support?
Not in the UK where I am from and not in Australia where I now live. If this is true, I am shocked. A DNA test by a well regarded/authorised laboratory that determined parentage would mean all previous bets are off. There have even been well publicised cases in the news about it where BM has lied and passed off children to a man and then got sued to the max.
Prepare to be shocked. Sadly
Prepare to be shocked. Sadly it is true far more often than not. We tolerate idiots to make these types of decisions from the Bench rather than fix the system to make sure that we don't have these idiots failing us all
Yes, pretty much goes without
Yes, pretty much goes without saying. Again, I don't know what the answer is, but early on I remember a case where a dad found out when his kid was 4 or 5 that the child was not biologically his. He and his then wife divorced when the kid was 1 or 2. Then, a couple of years later he started dating a nurse who noticed a picture somewhere that showed mom and dad and their supposed child together, and the nurse somehow knew that due to the eye color of the child, it probably could not be his, given his eye color and his then-wife's. He got DNA testing for the child, which confirmed it was not his, and then he told his ex-wife and child something along the lines of, "Sorry, I'm not the child's father and you need to have a relationship with your real father."
To make a long story short, he wound up getting a lawyer to get the support payments stopped and get back child support returned. This all happened very quickly and was in the early stages of possible DNA testing that can show without question that the child is or is not yours. Anyway, he didn't win, and he was PO'd and this whole story was being aired re: "both sides" of the issue. The initial dad kept saying, "I was tricked," "I am clearly not the bio-father," "the kid needs to have a relationship with his real father," and so on. None of it worked. And, yes they had already had a father-son relationship, but the child was still young, and dad was tricked, as he said. It came out that one of the main reasons for them getting married in the 1st place was that the woman claimed she was pregnant with his child. Which, she was not. Didn't make any difference.
The one thing I remember is how the attorney for the state he was trying to sue for stopping child support, kept going on and on about poor child, and he wants his daddy (meaning fake-daddy), and the child doesn't understand, and how can fake-daddy do this to his kid and so on. Every time the reporter tried to bring the question back to something like, "Hey!, he was clearly tricked and told false info. by this woman, and why should he have to pay the price for that?", the state attorney just brought the entire topic back to the poor-child again. AND, I agree I felt very sorry for the child, very sorry. BUT, even back then, years ago, long before I met my DH, I'm like, "Geez!, why should the guy have to pay the price for that!?" Well, apparently he does. End of story.
Again, not trying to fully take sides here. Just saying that as a woman, even I get sick and tired of moms seemingly getting away with near criminal acts just for the sake of protecting the child. And, actually even "protecting the child" doesn't come into play. It is more about BM getting away with it just because she is a BM.
I’d lien thank you for
I’d lien thank you for responding. Yes, BM shouldn’t just be allowed to claim without proof. So many stories like these of man anchored down to carry a responsibility that they been tricked into.
Except your DH wasn't really
Except your DH wasn't really tricked, he knew that he may not be the father but accepted the children as his own anyway. Dh should have asked for proof of paternity as soon as the kids were born but he didn't then and still doesn't want to know now. As with most issues on this site, this isn't really a BM or skid issue, it's about a b@ll-less spineless DH who doesn't want to know the truth. He remarried and had more children that he really couldn't afford, this is all on him.
Still learning. My husband
Still learning. My husband did not know she tricked him. 4 years passed before she confessed to him that she had been wth multiple guys in times that they were separated. That’s when he first had doubts about the paternity. Shortly after he caught her cheating on him because she’d make excuses to leave a certain time every week she was meeting up with some other guy. This broke it off he left and divorced her. Yes he hasn’t had the balls to find out because he’s got a good heart. He’s been so close at times to get a DNA test but then says he’d be crushed because he’s raised them and if he’s not they’d be crushed too.
He’s a good father the twins are extremely disrespectful to him. Talk back and don’t listen to him at all. They are trained by BM my MIL and SIL to not take any discipline given by my husband. Their room at our house is trashed completely. They can’t be told to pick up their room or else they’d go complain that we treat them like slaves they’ve done this before. They want to sit and watch their favorite shows all the time and take over completely. They complain about my little ones when my husband puts on a Mickey Mouse show. It’s sad my husband fears disciplining them because he doesn’t want to lose them completely. He was 50/50 for years until 6 months ago when he told them to earn things that he wasnt just going to hand it to them. He asked for good grades and good behavior. He asked them to pick up a chore as well. They cried so much complained so much and said that they didn’t want to return here because ur was a prison.
They treated us badly and made drop-offs impossible since they didn’t want to stay. The Ex filed for sole legal custody got them 80/20 collected more CS and handed them off to my MIL and SILfor them to care for. Those kids are highly trained to be disrespectful. Last night one of them kept talking back and my husband sent him to his room he said no and wouldn’t listen until my husband got up and escorted him to his room. Because my husband put his hand behind his back as he walked him to his room he yells “child abuse!!!!! I’m going to tell my mom on you...yes he really did use that card
Despite everything my husband doesn’t want to give them the heartache if their not his.
So they were seperated and
So they were seperated and she comes back to him pregnant. Didn't DH get a clue then or maybe think, "hmmm..." 6 years later he's still waffling about the possible paternity issue and walking on eggshells around them. It sucks that the twins have been trained to be disrespectful and your husband is too scared to actually parent.
Honestly, it doesn't sound
Honesty, it doesn't sound like they would be all that upset about him not being their father. They don't seem to care about him or respect him in any way or even want to be around him in his house that is like a "prison." Where does he get this idea that they would have "heartache?"
Thats shocking in USA
it should be well if dad had no doubts when kids were born because he never suspected wife was cheating and kids look like her (same looks/skin tone etc), he’d have no reason to question if he’s the father but if later she tells him i slept around alot around the time i conceived so they might not be yours, he should have immediately attempted to file with courts mandatory dna testing and hold her accountable for fraud if they were not his kids because that is what she has done
she engaged in fradulent behaviour and tricked this man and that is the way i believe australia and uk see it
in usa they even say even if you had doubts when they were born, it was upto you to deny signing the birth cert wih your name
The USA sees it as, if you
The USA sees it as, if you are married to a woman, you are responsible for any children that come into that marriage. That's to protect children financially from their mothers being whores - if the husband doesn't support them, their standard of living goes way down.
If you are not married to the woman, you have a better chance of challenging paternity, as long as you do it right away, and don't wait until the kid sees you as "dad". By then, you have established a pattern that says you also see yourself as "dad" and that stands in court.
It's meant to benefit the child, but do manipulative women take advantage? Absolutely.
OP, your husband can't win this paternity thing, and you don't know that they aren't his kids. See this as him paying for a huge mistake he made in ever marrying BM. The twins are alienated, so there really is no point in trying to have regular visitation. If I were in your shoes, I would request that DH take his visitation elsewhere (for a couple hours a week), and I would get a second job myself to help support the family, since if he gets one, they will take more from it in CS.
The one gift BM gave him is taking sole custody, so he is no longer required to take visitation. It's sad that his family has turned on him, but that's all part of the alienation game.
It's like being scammed out of your life's savings. Even though the scammer is guilty of a crime, that doesn't mean you get your money back. Feeling victimized about it forever won't help anything.
Law is different in every state
Here is a good article.
https://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/22/magazine/22Paternity-t.html
From that article -- In 2002 the National Conference of Commissioners on Uniform State Laws — an influential body of lawyers and judges that proposes model laws — drafted a compromise. The proposal would allow the presumed father, the biological father or the mother to challenge the paternity until a child turns 2. The proposal had two goals: to balance the rights of children with those of their presumed fathers and to encourage parentage questions to be raised early in a child’s life, before deep bonds are formed. Several states, including Delaware, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Texas, Utah, Washington and Wyoming, have adopted that model or a variation of it.
Anyone can get a cheap over the counter DNA test before bothering to go to court. OP's DH has not had much a case. For 6 years he has been aware he might not be the father, and did nothing.
And, you would have to be
And, you would have to be aware of that possibility before the child is two. Many men find out after the fact or only suspect long after the child is over the age of two. I get that the states or gov.'t is trying to say that after two-years of age some sort of relationship has been establiushed between the child and proposed dad, so after that, again, "for the child's sake," proposed dad is on the hook regardless. But, like in the example above, and others, the dad isn't even aware that that is a possibility until surprise! Are men supposed to go around assuming the woman they love and marry is some sort of guy-magnet and make sure they check it all out, via DNA, with any child the woman pops out, prior to that child reaching two years of age? Nowadays, maybe?
So bio parent can disappear from his financial responsibilities
but suddenly new stepparent is financially responsible!! Thats just absurd..
DNA/other relatives
1. In every state that I know of, there is a limited time period for a husband to contest paternity. Once reason for this is that the mother will have come to rely on the status of her DH as the father, instead of looking for the biological father. As years go by, this search will become more dificult. Blaming all this on incompetent lawywers will not change it. I challenge Rags to come up with ANY cite where paternity was successfully contested this late in the child's life. Even If I the courts accept that the father was not aware of the possiblity that he was not the father untill the kids were 4, they are now 10. Not a good fact.
2. Whether the mom's relatives or the dad's relatives help with time and money to raise the child is generally irrelevant. Mom's relatives can help, so can dad's.
3. If you think that the ex is a bad mother, your DHs only option is to try to go to court and increase his parenting time.
DH had his lowered. I just
DH had his lowered. I just googled it since I don't know all the details and it came up as a modification
If he is not the Bio father
The courts will still have a hard time stopping CS. What are the courts going to say, Joanna’s DH you can stop paying CS and the people of the great state of. Will pay for them. They will give them free medical ect. Unless some one is willing to step up to take over payments he stuck