Hon simply get your own place....

"I fucking hate the whole story. "

Then why live it? Having a child does not mean you have to move in and play house with the child's father. Your baby is no more entitled to that father and his resources than his four year old daughter is. The bedroom is as much hers as it is your son's. See, that's just the way things work...Dad doesn't get to just toss out his old kid because she cramps your style and wish her away.

He loves that daughter every bit as much as you love your son. He loves his son now too. He's going to fight to keep both children in his life, and yes, he's going to teach both kids his language and his culture.

You're not married. You don't have to live together. You don't have to care for the four year old, in fact even though she's your son's sister, you don't have to ever see this little girl. As Acra stated above, just move out. Do the court thing working through custody and a parenting plan between your boyfriend and you for the baby, get your own apartment and hopefully go back to school so you can help raise and support your son.

The little girl isn't going to poof nor is she going to go away just to accommodate your new son. Nope. If you're unhappy in the situation you created, you get yourself out of it and resign yourself to raising your son in two different households with shared parenting time with his father.

You're only 'stuck' and miserable as long as you choose to be. When you selected a man with a previous child, you gave up the chance to have whatever little family of three dreams you had cooked up in your head for your child and yourself. Children aren't disposable. It's 2017, children aren't shipped off to be taken care of solely by their mother until the new girl friend deems it ok and tolerable to occasionally visit their father.

Seems you choose to live in a bubble and now reality of life with a man of an already previous child who is just currently making his way through court to break off and settle affairs with his ex sets in.

A four year old is just a baby herself--you didn't say anything other than she encroaches on your space and doesn't speak english, and that sets you off. You need to learn to separate the child and your situation. Going into this, we're all aware that one day BM may dump a child (maybe damaged, maybe not) onto us and that's the possible consequences of being with someone who already has a child. I highly suggest counseling. My older daughter who is almost 4 is sharing a room with her younger sister who is a few months old and has been since she was born. I did when I was a kid. He'll live.

My bride was a single teen mom and High School student when SS-25 was born. She was a single teen mom college student when we met when SS was 15mos old.

If BF and this situation is that toxic then protect yourself and your baby boy from the toxic crap and strike out on your own. My very accomplished former single teen mom bride is a firm believer that if she can do it.... anyone can. She went on to graduate HS with her class and with honors with a 1yo on her hip as she walked at graduation, she went on to a dual major BS (Mgt/Acctg) with honors, an MBA with honors and to a successful career as a CPA. Granted we were married at the end of her freshman year of college but she did all of the work and then some.

BM may be a "weapon" as you call her but this situation is at least half created by your BF. Do you want him raising your son the same way he has raised his daughter? If not then you have two choices. 1.0 Take complete control and mandate how the entire situation will be addressed and manage everyone and everything to that goal. or ... 2.0 Move on and minimize the influence this shallow and polluted gene pool situation has on you and your child.

Option 1.0 can work and turn our happily. However, for that to happen you and FDH must be fully aligned, make each other and your relationship the unequivocal priority over everyone and everything including an kids in the mix and you both must be equity parents to any children in the home regardless of kid biology. Kids are the top relationship responsibility but never take priority over the relationship and the partners. Option 1.0 is a full time job and can never be ignored. Minimizing the impact of a toxic blended family opposition and minimizing the tendency for a prior breeder partner to lose the plot and go Disney Parent toward their prior relationship spawn is a real thing and has to be done to preserve the sanctity of the relationship and protect the interests of subsequent relationship progeny.

As for the BM/weapon... How do you defeat a weapon? ... You design and forge a better one and learn how to master its use so that when the opposition confronts you with their weapon the fight is over brutally and quickly in your favor.

As a college student you should be an accomplished researcher and analyst. So research and analyze and learn the legal system and all of the associated tools better than the BM and better than your own baby daddy. Be ready to add that knowledge to your quiver of weapons ready for use if needed. Never stop honing your knowledge and skills in managing BM and the situation to best be able to protect your own interests and family and tolerate no crap from anyone in the mix... including your own partner.

Congrats on the new baby. Good luck. Take care of you and the baby boy.

And.... stick to your studies, finish your degree, and prepare yourself for self sufficiency in the event this whole thing goes South on you.

Nope - not today.