I'm trying to wrap my head around the last four months but it's rather incomprehensible right now. BM told us back in April that she was offered a job 800 miles away. (BM has constantly been looking for ways to move away...) First, she brought DH and I to her house for a meeting with her and her husband to discuss this job offer. I think she was hoping we'd move with them or something but we made it clear we weren't willing to do that. Then she made it sound like she was going to move away and leave twin SS/SD8 with DH and I so she could accept this job offer and move away. We had already been casually looking for a new house within the twins' school district (the border was less than a mile from our current house and we'd grown out of it) but suddenly we needed to get a house right away so twins' wouldn't change schools. We got a house (one we are rather pleased with, too...) It's worth noting that BM's employer caught wind of her job interviews and decided to finally can her with this last one.

It didn't take long for BM to have a change of heart and she told DH that she consulted with an attorney to relocate with the twins. Our attorney petitioned for a guardian ad litem (boy, that ticked BM off...) and the report from the GAL concluded that the twins should stay rather than relocate. The report also scolded her for manipulating twins into believing they would see family that wouldn't be close to where BM wanted to relocate, particularly my family. (SS/SD are rather close to my family regardless of the distance and the "step" status. I have a great family and the GAL figured out what BM was trying to do and scolded her for it in the report. It wasn't easy trying to deal with the stress of all of this while also having BM try to use my family against DH and myself for her own gain.)

BM decided to take her chances and go to court anyway.

After purchasing a house, moving, a GAL report, two and a half days in court, and all the stress/heartache it caused everyone, the judge determined that the twins will stay here. Judge was quite specific on his admonishment that BM was being very selfish with this move; she was trying to eliminate a very stable family structure SKs had in two homes; bio parents and step parents were all very loving and supportive; DH, BM, and stepparent all got along for sake of SKs; and she wanted to throw it all away for a modest raise and to eliminate dealing with blended family arrangements. They just started school this week and we are slowly settling into a new routine. BM moved away officially (she thought there was no way she would lose) and she's gone -- sorta. She bought the twins iPad minis before leaving town and told DH that it was "illegal" for him to interfere with them in anyway and she could contact twins whenever she wanted, etc... She sent some parenting plan proposal that was so restrictive that DH would have needed to ask her permission for even so much as a trip to see grandparents or go to an amusement park. Our attorney assured us that she's blowing smoke -- iPads can be used at our discretion and we just have to keep contact with BM in a fashion where the court would consider it "reasonable" (e.g. a few minutes a night, half hour every other night, points where it doesn't interfere with, you know, family stuff.)

DH is going to file for CS soon. He knows it's going to cause a new sh*tstorm but he's right, she should support the kids, she knew this was going to happen if she lost, and she probably would have done worse to him/us. It's going to be hard to get used to this -- it still seems so unreal. We went from a 50/50 arrangement to 80/20 in so little time. I really feel for the twins -- they've never gone this long without seeing BM, they won't see their other siblings as often (half brothers aged 16 and 2). Poor SKs...