BUSTED
I recently posted about BM trying to access our internet in order to 'frame' me for hacking into her Facebook. So last night she comes out to the car accusing me of hacking into her Facebook two more times stating that she got a subpoena that 'pinged' it back to my computer. I decided I was done playing nice so I had a friend help me print out a log for my router showing all the devices that have accessed our internet and who have attempted to. Today when she picked him up i showed it to her and at first she denied it then later said 'Well that's what happens when you don't change your password.' Every time I think she can't get any stupider she surprises me! I pissed her off so bad that she was screaming in my face and saying to not bother picking up SS tonight because she won't allow us to have him. Thats her favorite threat right next to 'I will just have to tell my lawyer about this.' Just had to share! Sorry for the tons of posts lol
Forgot to add that I actually
Forgot to add that I actually called the police department back that had initially contacted me about the 'hack,' and they said that have no record about it at all. I gave them my phone number, my name, DH's name, and BM's name and they found no record of it. Any ideas?
Is what she did illegal? If
Is what she did illegal? If so, I'd report her. Or at least have the cops fill out an incident report to document it.
This is what DH is saying too
This is what DH is saying too but I looked up the phone number that called me and it came up as the local police department where she lives. I've also called the number before to ask about enforcing the CO so I'm totally at a loss??? And this is also the first time i've directly addressed her. Every single other time was all her. If I could never talk to her again I would be as happy as pie but apparently she can't understand 'do not talk to me.' Yesterday was a one time only deal just because I was so fed up and not going to deal with her trying to threaten me just because she didn't get her way.
Time to own her toxic ass and
Time to own her toxic ass and to make sure the Skid has clarity on how toxic and manipulative the womb donor is. Kids need the facts of the CO and of the behavior of the toxic opposition. It should be shared in an age appropriate manner and as the kid gets older they should have more and more information. Facts are not good or bad, they are just facts and with the facts the Skids can learn to protect themselves from the shallow and polluted end of their gene pool.
Start pressing charges, get an RO, haul her ass to court each and every time she so much as twitches out of compliance with the CO. Record her crap and rants on your phone. Save her toxic emails. Keep a call log/journal of every interface with her, every comment the Skids make about her, etc.... Document, document, document...... If you go to court with volumes of information, documents, and records it bares her ass when she pulls BS out of her butt in an attempt to get her way in court.
Own her ass. And have fun doing it. }:)
Yup, yup, and yup. We record,
Yup, yup, and yup. We record, document, and save everything. I think that's one of the biggest reasons we won in court, because we proved her lying over and over and over again.
If you don't report her
If you don't report her illegal use of your internet, you are condoning her behaviour. When I said on your first post she was going to use your internet to frame you, I wasn't just making a random guess, she's that type of crazy - she's not going to get better, so take it to the police to get a file started. You can keep it all calm and matter-of-fact for your own emotional well being, but see this through. You'll be glad you did in a year or two when the situation escalates! (They won't do anything, but you'll have a record.) I wish I had reported an illegal activity of my BM and that regret weighs on me. Don't make the same mistake.
I wish I had reported an
I wish I had reported an illegal activity of my BM and that regret weighs on me.
Me too
I've spoken to the police
I've spoken to the police about it and it's been documented and recorded. I wonder if I should speak to them again and let them know that she admitted to it?
Apparently I made the bitch
Apparently I made the bitch cry so hard that last night during pickup her MOM actually came out to the car and threatened me right in front of SS.
Its one thing for a bio mom
Its one thing for a bio mom to be yelling at you especially in front of step kids, but BM mother too, is not appropriate. I would be considering putting a restraining order on the BM mother, that she is not allowed to accompany BM when BM comes near your house. That is ridiculous.
I know what it feels like to have BM mother involved, My spouse deals with BM and her mother too. We haven't dealt with anything such as hacking into our internet, but if we did I would be reporting it too. Our day will come when trouble really rises but I feel I will be prepared, and I will document everything too.
All these crazy women
All these crazy women fighting and screaming in front of ss. This kid's gonna grow up to be a master manipulator.
I'm sorry, I haven't read any
I'm sorry, I haven't read any of your previous blogs, but is it necessary for you to be involved in the exchanges? It doesn't seem to be going very well! :O
I agree with this hon ^^^ Yup
I agree with this hon ^^^
Yup you busted her (bravo by the way), but now she has to move onto something else to 'top you', her crying etc at exchange to the point where her mother had to intervene will overshadow the whole internet thing.
It seems y'all are doing a lot of the right things, documenting, following up, reporting etc. What's also important when dealing with these nut cases is that you keep enough distance between YOU and her, like ZERO interaction! And that your DH's contact with her is always pleasant, brief and facts only, ALL other issues need to be through email (or text).
I know from experience; SO addressed something with BM, 'busted her' but all the lawyers were concerned about in the end was that BM felt 'intimidated' at exchanges, it made the situation BM was busted for null and void basically.
^^Agree. And why are you
^^Agree. And why are you dealing with her and not DH? Dealing with the ex should be his total and complete responsibility.
I agree with the women who
I agree with the women who are telling you to let DH deal with this exclusively. I have known my SO for 15 years, and his son. I still would never even speak to the BM or be there at an exchange. A few times when we were taking SO's son with us camping and then driving all the way back to get me would have been inconvenient, I had SO drop me off at a local StarBucks near BM's house. I feel it only aggravates the situation to have me involved. When SO's son is at our home, I am always kind to him, cook for him, etc.. but allow that time to be more with his father than me.
I don't wait the child to feel guilty for caring for me. He called me Mom a few times. I told him that was so sweet and I loved him so much but he had a mother. I told him he could call me that if he wanted but it wasn't necessary and wouldn't hurt my feeling if he didnt.
No matter how much I dislike BM, he is their child not mine.
Exactly !!
Exactly !!
Exactly !!
Exactly !!
I agree with MamaDuck and
I agree with MamaDuck and some of the other people here, it's about getting the balance between keeping yourself safe and having boundaries and not allowing the situation to escalate. Sometimes unfortunately it means being the adult in the situation and letting things go because in the end, the children come first and having your mother and father and step mother having screaming rows in the street isn't conductive to raising happy children. It doesn't matter what crazy stunts she pulls and who 'wins' what round; what matters is a peaceful coexistence where as far as the kids know from your side, you think she's ok.
If it were me now I would contact her by email asking to call a truce and pass it all over to DH with no contact from you. Otherwise as someone else here said, she will be wanting to redress the balance and things could get worse and worse.