This Sunday night issue is getting out of hand ...

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BM and DH signed a new parenting agreement back in March. There was a mistake in the agreement; it defines weekends as Friday 6pm to Sunday 6pm.

DH picks skids up directly from school Fridays, and takes them directly to school Monday mornings. This routine has continued for years; and did so for several weeks after the agreement was signed (neither BM nor DH caught it).

DH realized the error, emailed BM & the mediator to have it corrected. Mediator said it was outside the 7 day grace period for corrections. BM refused to agree.

BM got mad at DH a few weeks ago over something unrelated. She has since decided to start enforcing the Sunday night at 6pm definition. They've been to the parenting coordinator who recommended this change be made permanent; BM refuses to agree "until this issue is resolved". What does that even mean? If she's not willing to agree to anything, how will it ever be resolved?

We suspect she's filed in court (not sure about what or on what grounds). DH has also filed for the custody modification. My only concerns is whether a judge will even consider this a significant enough change?

Skids left the house in tears yesterday; thoroughly confused and upset by the change in the schedule. There's no telling DH it's not worth it; because it really matters to him to not lose this extra few hours.

Not sure if I want/need advice, or just to vent about it.

He tried to explain to them

He tried to explain to them very high level that the grown ups have an agreement and until they can agree to change it, this is what they have to follow.

They don't understand why it's changed. BM has told them that the judge ordered it and that this is what they have to follow and they don't have a choice. That clearly contradicts what DH has already told them. Not to mention it's a complete lie .. they've never gone before a judge and had ANYTHING "ordered".

It's a mess. They are 6 (STB 7) and 8. DH is generally blindsided when talking to them because BM has already filled their heads with nonsense.

SD8 asked yesterday, "Why doesn't Daddy get to make any decisions? Why can't he just decide that we're allowed to stay?" He does his best to keep answers simple and to not bash BM, but they have SO MANY questions. Giving honest, simple answers makes BM look bad, because they point out her lies.

Ugh .. idk. And to top it all off, BM wants them to stop attending therapy.

She wants them to stop

She wants them to stop therapy before the therapist sees HER crazy.

I can relate to "what doesn't Daddy get to make decisions" as we have been asked that question repeatedly. Every time there's a change, it's because BM demands (never asks or requests). Even when her demands make it harder on everyone involved, she doesn't care. She wants it her way.

If the parenting coordinator is involved, why can't it just be changed? The PC here changes things all the time. BM just sounds like she's being difficult because she can.

Back when they signed their

Back when they signed their parenting agreement, BM specifically had the agreement changed to state that the parenting coordinator does not have legal authority to change their agreement. She can only make suggestions, communicate with attorneys, and testify in court to her recommendations or verbal agreements made in her presence. DH didn't realize the impact this would have.

So, the PC is involved, and so far she is on DH's side. But he still has to file in court, get a judge to decide that it's a big enough change to even hear the case (which we think is what she's banking on NOT happening), summon the PC there, and hope the judge ultimately sides with him.

Or agree outside of court after absorbing the cost of multiple PC meetings, lawyer costs, etc. All the while, kids are confused and stressed over the changes.

The last agreement was done

The last agreement was done in mediation. Neither of them had the opportunity to walk away with copies to show their attorneys. The mediator really pressured them into signing a new agreement then and there.

That whole process was ridiculous to me. The parent coordinator has BARELY been any better. But in our state, the courts pretty much force this stupid process on the parents. DH never wins out because he's always willing to compromise for a better agreement for the kids. And he gets shit on every time.

Oh I know it .. he knows it

Oh I know it .. he knows it now too.

They potentially could, but

They potentially could, but DH never had any intention of pursuing that. The change would be minimal.

The biggest CS factor will be the bonus income and the COLA she gets from her job, that she conveniently left out of their last calculation.

If she continues down this road, it's all back on the table though. She's had ample opportunity to resolve this civilly.