My son was okay...outside of the typical feeling of loss between a guy and his vehicle...LOL. His is mendable, but it would take more than the car is worth to fix it. Between the two of us searching the web, we found a near identical vehicle in need of a little mechanical work, but all the parts it needs is on the wrecked vehicle. We got the replacement super cheap, and BS19 is working with friends to move over the parts that need to be moved over. Personally, a good experience for him. Since he will be away from home, it will be good to know that he knows his vehicle inside and out once this is done, and should be able to fix nearly everything himself.

I think the best thing I did for my kids was during my separation/divorce from my ex. I showed them how to cope and move on! They were 8 and 4 at the time. Yeah, I hurt, but when I had my biggest breakdowns, I was sure to not do it in front of my kids. We talked about the situation, and they could see that mom was upset...but I didn't dwell on it! I kept our lives moving! Even with little money, I had something for us to do together every weekend...play at the park, go on adventures, etc. What I showed them was that it is okay to be upset that something didn't work out the way you intended, but you don't let it stop you from living your life! And I never used their life situations to excuse away their behavior. Yes, when my ex disappeared out of the kids' lives and my son was extremely hurt over it. My daughter handled it much better, but she wasn't his bio and knew it. Because he was "mean to mom", she was actually happy to see him gone. BS19 acted out at school and home. Now, I did let the teachers and staff know what was going on, but only so they could be aware...as they understand that children aren't mature enough to comprehend their emotions correctly. BUT, he was still punished for things! He didn't do his school work? Sure, I could have easily told the teachers to give him a break because of what he was going through, but I urged them to punish him (i.e., take away recess time to make him do his work), and I punished him at home with loss of privs. At the same time, I got him in to talk with the counselor, and she hooked him up with a group of children of divorced parents she worked with...where the kids could get together and talk about their feelings and realize they weren't alone. That was probably the best thing I could have done!! It taught him to cope! It taught him that bad things WILL happen, and it is okay to be upset, but you have to go on. It also taught BD23, as well, because she could see that he wasn't getting away with his poor behavior simply because he was going through stuff.

Too many parents walk around on egg shells around their kids when they are upset, and use their circumstances as crutches instead of learning experiences. What is happening is we are raising a generation of people who think that they are due special treatment because something "bad" happened in their lives, even if that perceived bad thing is something that is so minor to the rest of the world! "Oh, my boyfriend broke up with me! My life is over!!" Really? I can think of at least 100 things that are worse, that people go through every day and survive!