I don't think that it is your hormones. My first pregnancy my ex did not care at all. He made it clear that he did not want me to be pregnant and did not want me to continue the pregnancy. He never "warmed up" to the idea either.

My current pregnancy with my DH, totally different. This is his third child and he is over the moon. We didn't go out of our way to plan this pregnancy but I mean we know how these things work so it wasn't a surprise either. He has come to every appointment and my ultrasound. He has asked me questions when he sees me reading through the what to expect book, he rubs my belly and won't let me do anything like carry in groceries or anything. The only thing he has said and complained about is coming to my baby shower, he has zero interest and made that clear.

I'm not saying the above to be insensitive, but going through it as my second pregnancy, I can't help but think of how much I missed out on the first time around and how completely alone I was in all of it. I think you need to have a heart to heart with your DH and just say "I know this is the fourth time for you and you have done it all, but it's the first time for me and I'm scared, excited, nervous etc. and I want you there experiencing all of this with me" If he is that attentive to his children he already has, I'm sure he will be with this one and love her just the same. There is a quote somewhere, I don't remember exact wording but it's along the lines of "a women loves her child as soon as she knows it's growing inside her, a man loves his child the first time he looks into their eyes" I'm sure he will get there, maybe he just needs a little push.

Congrats on your pregnancy! I'm 34 weeks tomorrow myself with my first baby, a DD too

Like the poster said above, there's the saying(I can't remember word for word) but something like a woman becomes a mother when she finds out she's pregnant and a man becomes a father after the baby is born. I probably messed up the saying but basically some men, it wont feel "real" until the baby is here.

There are times my DH seems excited about kicks, etc. and other times not. I wouldn't worry about it too much now. I'll bet when your DD is here, he will go to all the appointments and it will be quite different.

Sorry I don't have any better advice but don't stress yourself over it. Your little one will have the best mommy!

Good luck

Some men just aren't involved in the pregnancy. Something clicks the first time the hold the baby but until it is "real" to them they are detached. I am sorry you feel alone in this. Maybe try to look at it as this is your special time with your baby.

I dont know. I have found a lot of men are insensitive. You are not wrong for feeling bad. He needs
to show that hes a part of all this and not just focus on his kids now.

I know when I had my first child with DH there was this little undercurrent of Been there.Done that. He went to appointments with me but didnt want to do childbirth classes because he did them already and didnt want me to get nice bedding for the crib becasue when SD was little blah blah blah. I think when the baby is born your DH will change but you should still be able to enjoy the excitement of your 1st baby with DH. You need to sit him down and explain that you understand hes been through it before but its all new and exciting to you and you want to share it with him.

You cant just hint around because if hes like my DH he doesnt get hints. You have to just say it. Stupid men!! Need to be hit over the head sometimes!

I agree with others, DH wasn't nearly as excited about me being pregnant as I was! It just wasn't "real" to him until he held the babies. For what it's worth, he came to virtually NONE of my OB appointments. And honestly, I didn't care about that so much. I mean, they're really freaking boring for the most part! "Here, pee in this cup, get on this scale, let me measure your belly, OK go home."

Is he involved in other ways? Infant CPR classes, setting up a crib, picking a name - there are a TON of other things he can (and should!) be involved in. If he's doing those things, I think he's just a pretty normal guy. Talk to him and let him know that YOU need him (it's certainly not for the baby's sake at this point), but try to cut him some slack too. It can be hard for guys to get as jazzed about pregnancy as we moms get, since it tends to be abstract for them until the baby is born.

Unless it is for an ultrasound I don't understand having a DH come to every doc appointment. What is so special about a routine checkup? I never even asked my husband to go to the doc with me except for sonograms.