On being a SAHM ..
A friend of mine on FB posted this article today:
http://living.msn.com/family-parenting/mom-to-mom/article?cp-documentid=...
And then proceeded to poke fun at how ridiculous and absurd it was. Her exact comment was "Hahaha, oh man, this is great! Wait, what? She's serious and this isn't written to be funny? That's okay. Read this for a laugh, because it really is ridiculous."
I guess my question is .. what makes it so absurd? This friend is a SAHM to 5 kids, whom she homeschools. She is college educated, but hasn't had a job (other than SAHM) in a few years. Assuming this continues until her oldest is in high school .. what marketable skill will she have in 10 years if her husband decides to divorce her?
I work, could never be a SAHM, and would not consider home schooling .. so maybe I'm just not understanding her perspective?
Assuming that you retired 15
Assuming that you retired 15 years ago, that means you worked for a length of time in your career field, right?
That wouldn't' be the case for this person. She worked entry level for about 2 years after college and then quit to be a SAHM once they started having babies (not that I'm judging her for that, but i think it just makes her situation different than yours).
I hired a SAHM as my admin.
I hired a SAHM as my admin. She is my most valuable employee and I haven't regretted the decision for one minute.
A SAHM, in a lot of but not all cases, has a ton of marketable skills. Especially one that has a degree and home-schooled the kids.
In the case of my admin, she is divorced and has three kids still at home. All boys, 8-15. They are in sports and she is very busy all of the time. Plus two of them are ADHD. She is usually 20 minutes early for work, asks for days off way in advance and works her ass off.
Don't knock a SAHM re-entering the work force. Most have been multi-tasking for years, dealing with several schedules and never gets days off.
You find one, like I did, with a great work ethic and I guaranty you'll do everything you can to keep her on your staff.
Not knocking her at all .. I
Not knocking her at all .. I was more or less taken aback by her mockery of the article. The woman who wrote it seemed to be legitimately trying to give advice on being a SAHM. it seemed to me the article was geared to a different audience .. perhaps career-oriented or focused women considering the SAHM gig.
KWIM? I would never knock a person for making the decision to stay at home ..
Sorry....I didn't mean you. I
Sorry....I didn't mean you. I meant a lot of people judge SAHM and assume they don't have any marketable skills, when I've found most (not all) are more reliable and have a better work ethic.
My admin is a diamond and I would be devastated if she left. I have offered to train her to be full time and for promotional possibilities but she is happy doing the job she has right now.
Understood. There are two
Understood. There are two sides to every coin.
And while I'm not saying that SAHM's have no marketable skills, I would think they'd be diminished in comparison to others who've been recently active in the workforce. Especially when the job market is in a down swing and decent paying jobs are hard to come by. I acknowledge my perception could be way off base ..
I just looked over the
I just looked over the article and it was pretty scary to me and not funny at all. I am not and could not be a SAHM. Every mom has the right to decide what is best for thier families but this article pointed out that she gave up her job skills to raise her son and she had nothing when she and her husband got divorced. She spent two years living off of child support and alimony. Sure, she went to therapy but why not enroll in classes? Get a part time job. Anything. That part really bothered me.
Oh, I could also never homeschool my kids. I am so thankful everyday when they get on the bus.
the SAHM's i have interviewed
the SAHM's i have interviewed typically have talked too much about mommy things in the interview, made far too many inquiries about flexible schedules and even if they were smart and had a good resume prior to SAHMing they fail my simple computer test every time.
if you choose to SAHM, you MUST keep current on your computer skills. i also know its more difficult for someone in a profession that has constantly changing laws to keep up on, like a tax accountant or a lawyer. i know a few successful moms who were able to leave and re-enter the workforce but it isnt always as easy as some want to believe it is.
for our admins (and even
for our admins (and even department heads) we test them on basic Microsoft Word and Microsoft Excel functions. we try to make it "fun" and relate it to the position.
for example, someone working in a department where they do payroll we will usually give them an excel exercise asking them to calculate (using the formulas!) the overtime pay for employee a, b, c, d. we then often ask them to write a memo to the board about an issue which shows us both whether or not they can use Word and whether or not they can actually write. we often have them do a proofreading exercise as well.
we use Outlook for email but dont test anything on that. what i look for in Excel is formula use and what i look for in Word is whether someone can set up tabs and margins without simply hitting spacebar 8 million times.
feel free to Message me with any other questions you may have! good luck on the job hunt!
If you're getting into
If you're getting into anything financial related, brush up and become familiar with Microsoft Excel. I'm an accountant, my previous job was as an auditor .. and I've never seen a Finance/Accounting department that didn't use Excel. Pretty much every department in my company uses Excel is SOME capacity.
There are a lot of great online programs that you could do from home. Lynda.com offers a lot of tutorials that don't require any materials and have relevant business applications (when to use Excel formulas, not just how). That particular site runs about $25/month for the month to month subscription (cancel anytime), but I don't think you'll get any certifications or anything out of it.
We've turned away plenty of
We've turned away plenty of people for lack of proficient computer skills. I don't think any of them were re-entering the workforce after being a SAHM, but I agree that the skills are absolutely critical.
I have a BA, A.S. and worked
I have a BA, A.S. and worked so hard as a paralegal for 10 years before staying home to be with the babies. It was hard decision and I knew going into it that my field was not something I could just put down for 10 years and walk back into whenever I felt like it. It really does suck to have made so much headway and worked so hard to get where I was all to let fall by the wayside.
I'm at a crossroads right now as my youngest enters kindergarten. I don't even want to think about how out of date I am. I am grateful to be the in the position that I don't HAVE to work. But, honestly, I'm not interested in staying home the rest of my life. The sooner I get back out there, probably starting from scratch all over, the better. Sigh.. Life's a gamble but I think I made the right choice.
IDK. Maybe it's the agreement
IDK. Maybe it's the agreement she has with her husband. I had a good friend who was homeschooled with her sister. Do she and her husband argue a lot?
I will say this- being a SAHM seems to be a lot of work. Some of my friends do it and are great at it.
Also, my little sister was a
Also, my little sister was a SAHM for 15 years. Didn't finish college. Her last job was as a server for Coco's. She spent the first few school years home-schooling her two oldest kids, however soon realized she was not cut out for it. Entered the oldest two, then the youngest two into charter schools. All do very well.
She spent her days taking care of her DH, kids, pets and home. She was (and still is) active in her church and ran several groups. During this time she became proficient on the computer and very organized.
However, when the housing market crashed, her DH lost his job and they lost their house and they filed for BK. My sister and her DH sat down (Pentecostal family and not big on her working) and had a come to Jesus meeting. Both realized in order to make it out of the hole, they both had to find jobs. My sister found hers first.
She works for a company that goes into foreclosed homes and analyzes damage and insurance risk for resale. Since she started she was received several raises and promotions. Department heads fight over who gets to have her in their department.
SAHM for 15 years. No college degree. She has managers fighting over her.
I wouldn't discount the level of skill just because they gave up their careers outside of their home.
I read the article as an
I read the article as an advice piece to career-oriented women who may or may not realize all that comes with being a SAHM. The work portion was just one piece of it.
I was more taken aback by my friend's mockery of the article and discounting it as some joke. While being a SAHM may be fantastic for her, and while your sister may have ended up with a successful career despite no college degree and being a SAHM for 15 years .. that is surely not the case for everyone.
The article just didn't read as "absurd" to me. I may not agree with all she said, but I would think they would all be things people entering into this decision would want to at least consider?
You're friend sounds more
You're friend sounds more scared than anything else.
I imagine what was going through her mind was "what if I end up on the losing side of a divorce and had to go back to work now??"
She may have mocked the article out of fear. If that makes any sense.
Yeah, I know what you mean.
Yeah, I know what you mean. Maybe scared, and maybe just really naive?
OMG, i just read the article
OMG, i just read the article - who would ever ask an ex to co-sign a mortgage? and further, who would ever actually think they'd say yes?!?!?
Yeah I think she realized
Yeah I think she realized that it was a dumb idea. LOL .. I appreciated her candidness.
I have a home business as
I have a home business as well as homeschool my kids and it is not hard, but it is exhausting. I mean, your day NEVER ends! I'm also a single mom, so I've been through the whole divorce crap. My kids were young when we divorced, but I can imagine it would be worse if they were older and I wasn't prepared to go without child support once they turned 18.