BM wants copies of pay stubs
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She sent an email requesting recent copies of DH's pay stubs so she can have child support amended upon her return to MD.
He doesn't have to provide them to her, correct? We're definitely not comfortable handing over that information, and it doesn't seem like he should have to. I would think he would provide that information to the court directly.
From my experience we hand
From my experience we hand them to our lawyer and then our lawyer sends them to her lawyer. If lawyers are not involved then I don't know.
She's not moving back here
She's not moving back here until the end of the month, but I know what she's up to. She wants to hurry up and have child support modified before her new pay raise and base housing allowance kicks in.
I'm just wondering how much stalling we can do before we HAVE to turn this stuff over.
Our state has online
Our state has online calculators for child support .. but according to her she has a lawyer drafting up the paperwork for the modification so it's ready when she moves back here.
I think she's trying to hurry and get a modification done before her new pay raise comes in ..
I don't think she'd go THAT
I don't think she'd go THAT far .. getting caught doing something like would end her career.
I just don't want to make it any easier for her than we have to. She's had it easy enough so far as it is.
They'll go as far as they
They'll go as far as they need to get what they want. BM falsified her medical document expenses to get DH to pay by requesting him to pay duplicates (one receipt from the hospital, one receipt from the insurance company, for the same visit.)
My biggest concern is that
My biggest concern is that she'll make something up and the system will recalculate without his input. Can that happen? I've heard so many horror stories!
The main problem is she's trying to adjust now because she's expecting a HUGE bump in pay and housing allowance come summer time. Once that happens, DH will owe next to nothing.
They would have to contact
They would have to contact him to verify anyway unless she gives them false documents in which case she can get in huge trouble. It's only when he doesn't answer court summons that they won't take in his input. He has to be notified.
Tell her to get a lawyer and
Tell her to get a lawyer and request a damn discovery. Or go to CSEA like every other person has to when they request a modification. As Rags once said to me, you're going to get bent over the barrel and you want to make it easy for them to do it?
And no, anything she asks for, unless you are compelled by a judge or it was in the CO that he had to upon her request, is just a request.
How long does it take for a
How long does it take for a modification to happen? Just curious because I know what she's up to ..
No way we'll be handing this over directly to her.
If they go through the
If they go through the department of child support services, I think it's rather simple and takes a very short amount of time. A month or two at most because they will just ask for a lost of information from BM's side, a list of information from the BF's side and once all the information is in they just run their calculations based on it and spit out a modification order. BM runs the risk obviously of having it lowered which she can always appeal but that's on her.
The horror stories you may have heard is if Bm was being fraudulent in what information she provided since they don't do as deep a check as they should... it can happen which is why going to trial with a judge is usually the best since you can debunk/provide proof if she is indeed being fraudulent. Costs more money though since you'd probably hire a lawyer for it and will probably take longer.
Never ever give your BM any
Never ever give your BM any of your information directly, especially not pay stubs.
She wants to have the child
She wants to have the child support modification done now because if she waits a few months, DH's payments will drop dramatically.
She's moving to the DC area and her housing allowance (included for child support purposes) will increase from $1428 to $2679 (almost double!).
It will likely take a while to take effect, but if she hurries up and has the modification done now, it won't show on her current pay stubs.
Let her. Then when the
Let her. Then when the payments drop dramatically, just file for modification on your end.
Is there a limit to how often
Is there a limit to how often you can file for these modifications? We've never done this before.
Her new pay will represent a 26% increase in her pay, while DH's would stay the same .. I think that's grounds enough for a modification, right?
Um, I think it's only if your
Um, I think it's only if your DH was paying more than his required amount (which is a percentage of his salary) and she doesn't have 100% full custody there might be some wiggle room.
in Florida if there is a 15%
in Florida if there is a 15% increase or decrease in pay for either party it is rgounds for modification.
Even more reason NOT to give
Even more reason NOT to give her. Let her go through the proper channels
Okay so here's the next
Okay so here's the next question .. does he just ignore the request? Or tell her no?
Ignore.. until you see
Ignore.. until you see something from the court.
If you can not ignore tell BM to simply KICK ROCKS!
I don't know MD's CS laws
I don't know MD's CS laws (and frankly I'm too lazy to look) but two questions:
First, Don't you share 50/50 custody "normally"? Are you going to resume 50/50 custody when she returns?
Second, stall for a few weeks/months. Mention it to the attorney and see if he thinks it is a good idea to counter with a request of HER pay. If so, then, I'd do two things:
a) request a copy of her LES (Leave and Earnings Statement) between 30-60 days AFTER she moves. I think on the other thread you said she is moving in on June 1. I'd be submitting my travel claim within the first 2 weeks....so...... Ask for a copy of her July LES _AFTER_ July 25 (give or take). Don't give her a heads up or she might just delay her travel claim; it is easy to justify a delay.
b) You said she is Navy right? Until 2013 all SRB's (cash bonus) were paid out in the Oct pay period. This year things changed and SRB's are being disbursed at the anniversary of the reenlistment. Now, I don't know if she is getting an SRB as I don't know what kind of corpsman she was before becoming a Resp Tech.....but chances are decent that she receives an SRB. If you can't wait until July, I'd ask for a current LES (they are issued after the 20-24 of the month --give or take) ****you do NOT want a mid-month stub, you want a full LES that gives ALL information**** and also for Oct 2012 LES. She can easily access the LES online.
Play the "I'll show you mine if you show me yours" card and see if she bites.
Katie
Would she have an LES
Would she have an LES statement showing her MD BAH now? DH used to be Navy as well, so he's familiar with all these statements. I doubt she would provide it if she had it since she's not receiving that pay yet.
I'm just not sure how we do all of this now BEFORE her CS modification. It seems like she'll rush to get her increased CS payment now, and then we'll have to file for another modification in a few months.
That's another point to .. we will be going back to the 50/50 arrangement (which is actually closer to 42/58) but will the CS office consider that? Or will they look at the time split in the last year which is closer to 35/65?
Oh good!!!! So you two
Oh good!!!! So you two aren't totally blind to what you are dealing with!!! Good on you!!
No, her MD BAH isnt' going to show until June 1.
Honestly, given all of this I would call her out to her face.
Get your attorney to delay and delay. Now, I don't honestly have any idea of how to do that. My Xh adjusts CS on his own when it goes up and down and it doesn't go below the CO (low COLA area when it was issued). I don't even ask for it.
What a cluster....
Kate
If she is not moving til the
If she is not moving til the end of May, she won't get the BAH change until 1 July (30 June) LES.
Oh, also..... you do NOT want
Oh, also..... you do NOT want an LES from when she was still in TX. You can mentally adjust X, Y, & Z on the LES to local MD numbers if you get an LES from before June (that is a June LES released at the end of June), but the numbers you want are from June on.
----thinking aloud------
Alright, I've never actually LIVED in TX.
And.... I have NEVER EVER lived in MD (nor do I want to).
BUT, I'm making a HUGE assumption that the cost of living is different? Isn't is MUCH more expensive to live in MD than TX?
Dude!!! If that IS the case THAT is why she is trying to get this done fast!!
Her BAH (Basic Allowance for Housing) is based on where she lives.
Soooo, her April LES is going to have TX BAH.
Her May LES is going to be a wash of both TX BAH and her change in status (so no BAH for part/all of the month and other allowances fluctuating).
Her June LES is going to have her MD BAH.
If my assumption is correct (and in jsut a sec you can check) then her pay will be different by quite a bit.
Okay go here: http://www.defensetravel.dod.mil/site/bahCalc.cfm
This is easy to use:
Year: 2013 (duh---I'm the master of the obvious);
Duty Zip: (this is going to be WHERE SHE WORKS....you know your area, see if you can't figure it out. If needs be give the zip where her new address will be and there might be a $100 difference depending on the area.);
Pay Grade: (Okay, you have to know what her rank is......)
Now, do that for both where she is right now (just use her home zip) AND for where she is headed.
Is there a large difference?
Kate
Yes, it's a lot more
Yes, it's a lot more expensive. Not to mention, she's actually going to be living in the DC area, which is probably the most expensive general area of MD to live in.
Yup .. TX is $1428, MD is
Yup .. TX is $1428, MD is $2679
This is why she's rushing .. she wants it done BEFORE the MD BAH shows up on her pay stubs ..
I found a Maryland attorneys
I found a Maryland attorneys page that says:
When can child support orders be changed?
Child support orders cannot be changed on a whim or because a court thinks that "it is time." It must be based on evidence proving that there is good reason to make the change. This usually requires that a person who wants to make the change show a changed circumstance. You must show that the facts that existed when the last order was entered have changed. (In the many years a child support order is in place, the parent's circumstances may change many times.) For example, in Maryland, if one parent's income has changed (either gone up or down) by at least 25%, this is considered a big enough change to require a change in the support order. You can request a modification for a lesser change in income, but will not necessarily be guaranteed a change in the support order.
http://www.mddivorceonline.com/mdpages/childsupport/modificationchildsup...
She will definitely cross
She will definitely cross that 25% threshold. Her current pay right now is approximately $4625-4726 .. the increase in BAH will be $1251 .. a minimum of 26.5% increase.
Okay..... I'm think aloud
Okay..... I'm think aloud again......
It is May 2.
She "arrives" June 1.
You want to delay until at least the end of June for the purpose of an LES.
BUT...... you'll go to much more physical custody after June 1, right?
I'd go see the attorney and find out what you need to do to delay. I'd delay delay delay.
You don't have a long time to have to delay to AND if you have to do it before I'd try to introduce the change in BAH as of June 1 even if it isn't documented yet.
Good luck,
Kate
I'm really hoping we're able
I'm really hoping we're able to delay and catch her in her game. She said in her email she will be filing for the modification once she returns .. which is May 24 (Friday night). She flies back out that Monday evening (Memorial Day). She won't be able to go to a court to file anything.
I don't know the date she actually "checks in" to her new base though .. and I think that is what triggers the new rates, correct?
Granted, she could probably just mail in whatever she needs to file from Texas.
So assuming she waits until the end of the month to actually file, that would buy us some time, right?
I just wish I had a better understanding of how the whole modification process and timeline worked.
Yes, we'll definitely try to
Yes, we'll definitely try to introduce the increased BAH even if she doesn't offer that info up. The rates are published online and easily verified; not sure a judge would accept it, but it's worth a shot.
do you have a lawyer? do you
do you have a lawyer? do you plan on getting one? is there documentation that you have that she will be receiving this increase in pay at a certain date? i'm not sure if the amount of time with the kids factors in child support in maryland, but it does here. with all this going on, i'd highly suggest you speak to your lawyer.
Oh, DH will definitely
Oh, DH will definitely consult with his attorney. We just received this email from her this morning, so it's all still a little fresh.
His attorney is helpful in regards to the MD legal part of things, but she's pretty ignorant when it comes to the workings of the US Navy. It's helpful when we have a really solid understanding of what we're dealing with .. luckily DH is former Navy, so he's a huge help.
We don't know the exact date of the change, but military procedure is not exactly classified. Once she checks in at her new base, she will receive the new housing allowance rate, which is published online. The exact date of check-in is unclear to us, but DH will have the girls all summer (BM gets EOWE), so even delaying until the end of July would work out for us.
And time with the child DOES factor in .. BM was living out of state for about 8 months, so if the court looks back in time, DH would have less time in the calculation. However, once BM is local, they have about a 42/58 split of physical custody (CO just says joint legal/physical). Hopefully the court looks forward and what the arrangement WILL be from now on.
Hmmmmm, so let's talk general
Hmmmmm, so let's talk general standards........
Generally speaking most people take 30 days leave to PCS greater than 1000 miles.
You are almost guaranteed that she is NOT going to take more than that long.
However, if she has a lease signed is your ticket to answers.
You mentioned that she "moves in" on June 1. How firm are you on this? Has she signed a lease? Now, BAH is NOT like the "olden days" where you had to show a lease, but your Per Diem ends when you move into a new home and your BAH starts.
I'd still delay. As for her modification, she is jerking your chain and honestly....if you have the kids 50/50 (give or take) vs the occasional visitation you had when she was in TX.....
What a witch.
Kate
She has signed a lease and
She has signed a lease and provided a new address. She said her "target" move in date was June 1 .. but either way, her lease will be effective at that point regardless of whether her stuff is there now or now.
She graduated C-school on April 19 .. so her 30 days has been ticking away since then.
Thank you for being so helpful
Not a problem! I am glad I
Not a problem! I am glad I can be of some help.
Apr 19 - June 1 is a long time... she is undoubtedly NOT taking leave for that entire process. She hasn't "checked out" of her command there yet.
Good luck and I hope your attorney has better answers.
Katie
Well .. part of the reason
Well .. part of the reason she's still there is because she wants the girls to finish the school year there. Otherwise, they'd have to re-enroll in school here for just a few weeks.
She originally told DH she had to report to her new duty station by May 30, but I'm guessing that's changed now. I can't imagine how she could possibly work that out if she is keeping the girls enrolled in school through May 24 (disenrollment any earlier would not be considered a completed grade).
Her plan from the very beginning was to use as much leave as she needed to stay in San Antonio to make sure girls got a complete school year without any penalties or hold-backs.
Just say NO...unless a court
Just say NO...unless a court is ordering you to.
I have never heard of a CS
I have never heard of a CS mod taking less than 30 days, especially when the parties are not cooperating. More like MONTHS!! The court system is slow...also her new BAH can be figured into CSE now that she is back (or soon to be back) in MD/DC.
Believe it or not, we got our
Believe it or not, we got our CS modification filed, got our court date within 2.5 weeks, 2 days after the judge saw both DH & BM, we got a letter in our favor for the modification. I was so scared to open it just in case it was bad news because so soon. Judge originally told DH they'd have her decision in 3-4 months but our lawyer asked her to reconsider since child was no longer at BMs. Miracles do happen sometimes for BMs
But poster, you need to delay & just discuss with your attorney further---But isn't there just one clerk in your downtown family court office that can answer any questions for divorced parents in the armed forces?
I really hope that's the case
I really hope that's the case .. our state has a child support fraud hotline .. DH plans on calling and filing a report if she gets away with using old information. Then we'll wait a few weeks until we KNOW she's receiving the new pay and have it revisited again.
Maryland
Maryland
Also found out today from the
Also found out today from the paralegal at DH's attorney's office that BM can't just go and have child support amended on the spot (like she thinks she can). She also can't have them start withholding from his paycheck.
They have a pre-existing custody agreement that shows the agreed upon payment amount and method. While this is not concrete forever and can be modified as circumstances change, she has to go before a judge with DH and have it changed. The courts will not automatically grant wage garnishment if she can't prove that he hasn't been paying it.
So as long as DH's attorney can drag this process out as long as possible, we should hopefully be okay. With any luck, she won't get away with sneaking in an old pay statement that's no longer accurate.
Yes we are definitely NOT
Yes we are definitely NOT providing this information. She's slowly coming unraveled in her email communications .. ignoring her is probably the most entertaining thing!