Reflecting on the past two years
As many of you post about your horrible holidays because of skids, I can't help but reflect on what my life has been for the past two years. This holiday is relaxed and unencumbered by the stress of trying to make a relationship work with a Disney Dad who has a Golden Uterus for an exwife. It is no longer a concern of mine...because I came to my senses and realized I am worth more than I realized. Why would I spend my time with someone who put his children, himself, AND his exwife before me AND my kids? I don't know... This year I am making a committment to do EVERYTHING with my head, with common sense, and putting myself, my life, and my kids first before anyone else that wants to enter our world. No more drama from psychologically inept people allowed! To those "stuck," I wish you the best! I hope you have a peaceful holiday. May we all continue into the new year with positive outlooks and the right words to keep any other poor possible step parents from getting stuck themselves!
If you don't know what the Golden Uterus is, here's an article for you:
http://www.shrink4men.com/2011/05/17/does-your-wife-or-ex-wife-have-a-go...
This is a great article to share with women who are dating someone who has an ex like this, because they will see there is nothing they can do...these bms never change.
The golden uterus believes
The golden uterus believes that if she gave birth to your children, you are “connected for life.” She should always come first (even if you’ve both remarried) and YOU OWE HER until death you do part.
BM so tried this. She failed totally with DH's 2nd wife and then tried it with me and failed also.
I don't think it's that DH can't stand up to her but I know one thing he cannot stand up to me over this shit. I would be so gone and he knows it. Plus SS is an adult. BM can go suck eggs.
This article was seriously
This article was seriously one of thee best articles I have ever read! I am soooo tempted to mail it to bm! I just added it to my favorites list just in case I need it in the future!!!
Thanks a million for sharing this with us!!!
I think it's for the father
I think it's for the father AND the significant other. The bm wouldn't change from it. In many ways, too, the father won't/can't change, because a LOT of what he will have to deal with is out of his control if he doesn't have the kids. The problem is that most of these women have kids with codependent men. In my case, the father gave up control over and over that he actually has, which only flames her fire. For the significant other, it's beneficial to see exactly what he(biodad)/she is going to be dealing with FOREVER and decide if it's worth it to stick around.
IMO, if your dh is giving in to the GU, he probably needs some help w/ codependency.
This article hit the nail on
This article hit the nail on the head! Everything in it is accurate. Trying to enjoy Christmas today, might wait a few weeks to have SO read this as I don't want to even mention BM's name to him today (already slipped up once). I try to remove her from daily conversation as much as possible, I don't want her to get what she wants, to be the center of attention.