I am NOT babysitting YOUR kids!
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An acquaintance of ours died and the wake is Wednesday night, 6:00 to 8:00. I can't go because I am on call (I work in surgery) and the funeral home is too far away from the hospital. We have the skids Wednesday nights, and DH is supposed to pick them up at 5:00. So he told me that he is going to pick up the kids as usual, then go to the wake. Um....NO! You will NOT leave YOUR kids at home with me to babysit. Either you take them to the wake or you change nights to have the kids, or you pick them up after the wake. I do not need "quality alone time" with YOUR kids. Fuck that. I am sorry if I seem like an unsupportive wife, but you do not get to use me as a built in babysitter without my consent. You have other choices.
They are old enough to take
They are old enough to take care of themselves for an hour or two, so leaving them if I got called in wouldn't be an issue. The issue is as follows: I get home from my regular shift at 5:45. I start call at 6:30. That means I have 45 minutes to make sure I eat and take a nap in case I work all frickin night. I don't need to have my skids there to feed, then beg them to be quiet so I can sleep.
Stupid man idea that is!!
Stupid man idea that is!! what if you get called in?? your not at home painting your nails! I mean even if you were, thats your time and he needs to ask before hand.
I never watch the skids with DH there anymore as it was stupid, I dont need time alone with them just for you to go gym...WTF?!
Sounds like the conversation
Sounds like the conversation at my house last night about Xmas break. We have his daughter 6 full time so I said well you better tell her mom she's getting her while she's off cause 1. It's not my oldest son 14 responsibility to babysit while we are at work and 2. It's not mine when I get off of work either! I love how they think its our jobs lol yea right I would rather be a rat poison taste tester!!
Bahahaha! Do you think that
Bahahaha! Do you think that job is advertised on monster? Cuz I would like to sign up!
It doesnt make you an
It doesnt make you an unsupportive wife or a bad person or anything bad at all! You married a man with kids, who have a father and a mother that brought them into this world. They are THEIR BIO PARENTS responsibility...not now nor ever will they be YOUR RESPONSIBILITY!!!
ANYTHING & I MEAN ANYTHING that ANY SM does for HER MAN'S KIDS should ALWAYS BE A CHOICE!!! NEVER demanded or expected! PERIOD!
It's funny because I very rarely if EVER read of any of us sm who have kids of our own expecting or demanding our dh/so to babysit or play daddy to our kids! Hmmm I wonder why that is???
Probably because we KNOW that OUR kids are OUR responsibility!!! DERRRRR stupid fucking men!!!
AGREE. I hardly ever ask my
AGREE.
I hardly ever ask my DH to lend me a hand with my kids. Note I said ASK, I never ever expect or dump my kids on him period. They are not his kids, they are my responsibility. I can't even remember the last time I even went to the grocery store and left my kids where with him alone - I don't think I have.
Yet why is it that both BM and DH seem fine with dumping their kids on me to babysit? I have been trying for years to get out of this and its a constant battle - both BM and DH feel its my responsibility - I am so frustrated with that mindset and I can't seem to get out of it. Having my own kids makes it harder because I am here for my own children so how do I 'not be here' for the skids without being a total and utter bitch? That has been the problem all along. Its like saying, yes I am making dinner but not making any extra for 'your kids', yes I am home so my kids can come home from school since I telecommute but no your kids can't come here, and yes DH it is too much to assume on a daily basis - once and awhile to help you out, no problem, but that turned into full time babysitter. I can't seem to get out of it.
I honestly dont get how hard
I honestly dont get how hard it is for these low life bm and dipshit dh to grasp that taking care of YOUR kids are your FIRST & ONLY responsibility and taking care of the kids that bm & dh brought into this world are THEIR responsibility??!!! It is one thing to make dinner for everyone, that is not a huge deal BUT watching kids that are NOT your responsibility to care for because bm/dh dont want to do it or expect you to do it is unacceptable. PERIOD!!!
YOU married this man because you love him and want to be with HIM!!! NOT because you wanted to watch his fucking cretants and play Mommy and be a drop off center, doormat for bm & dh!!!
HONESTLY WTF is sooo hard for these fucking selfish, inconsiderate assholes to get???!!!
STEPMOM DOES NOT = live in babysitter, personal chef, chauffeur, maid, etc.
GET A FUCKING CLUE!!!
You hit the nail on the head
You hit the nail on the head with that one RAI!!!
No way. DH and I are VERY
No way. DH and I are VERY clear that HIS visitation with HIS kids is HIS. If he can't exercise his time, they stay with BM. I don't care how inconvenient this might be. It could never be as inconvenient as me having to babysit my least favorite children on the planet.
EXACTLY!!!!! My BF also knows
EXACTLY!!!!!
My BF also knows very well the same thing! I do not like his kid, I cant fucking stand him or BM, so why on earth would I watch him or do BM any favors? It has nothing to do with being unsupportive or a bitch or not caring about your dh/so or ANYTHING! It is about two people that brought a child into this world taking FULL RESPONSIBILITY for THEIR child just like us Bio- moms do with OUR KIDS! PERIOD!
When we marry a man we are marrying HIM because we love HIM and want to be with HIM...not because we want to raise their kids or babysit or be their maid etc. HELL NO!
I never had to really fight with my BF to see the light of this reality because he gets it, when he has his kid it is HIS TIME to spend with him NOT MINE! Skid doesnt come over to visit ME he is there to spend time with his FATHER!
I will not ever watch his kid or do anything that involves parenting etc for HIS KID, he has a mother and father, whether they are good parents or not is of no concern to me.
THEIR KID...THEIR RESPONSIBILITY. PERIOD!!!