BM is requesting pictures
BM has recently been persistently asking for pictures that I take of the girls. I posted a few on Facebook a while ago before I realized she had her friends and family setting up fake accounts to view my wall (I blocked her ages ago). I've since got my security on lock down and mostly refrain from posting ANY pictures.
Anyway .. so as of late she has been asking DH to have me send her pictures. Mostly from vacations or events we attend or just general things we do. I take a TON of pictures since most of DH's family is out of state.
She apparently will only snap the occassional picture of them with her phone while they are out. She is suggesting we "trade" pictures .. and since she sends him pictures "all the time", we should do the same and email her some of mine.
Keep in mind, not only do I feel NO obligation to do this (she has the girls 4+ days out of the week - she can take her own pictures), but of the pictures she does text us (keep in mind we get NO pictures of any real quality emailed), 90% of them are of the girls sleeping in the car.
LOL .. we are currently just ignoring the request. This whole thing goes hand in hand with her having her lawyer send us a letter requesting that we provide her a detailed schedule of all planned activities we have scheduled with the girls (including dining out, local attractions like the zoo, shopping, movies, etc) so she can plan her schedule accordingly and be able to discuss with the girls what they've done while at our house.
Do you have BM's who think they are so entitled to be involved in every aspect of your life? I understand if the girls' safety or welfare was at risk, but really, this is just day to day stuff .. not even overnight or out of town travel (which would be more understandable to me)!
This is exactly how I feel!
This is exactly how I feel! Again, I feel like we have so many stupid little issues like this with BM, and while individually they are silly, they just add up to be "one more thing" ... *annoyed*
I agree, she has no right to
I agree, she has no right to your pictures. Back in the day, bm#1 swiped a bunch of my pictures off of MySpace and posted them on her page. Pissed me off so bad.
Or..... Just to have a little fun.... Send her a bunch of the kids sleeping in the car.
I've considered a few things
I've considered a few things we could send just to mess with her:
1. Kids in the car (like you suggested)
2. Kids with me
3. Kids with DH
4. Kids with eyes closed, not looking, blurry, etc.
Haha .. we decided in the end it was best to not feed the monster
I'm not sure BM would know
I'm not sure BM would know what a coupon was if it was staring her in the face
She tried to get us to pay half of SD6's school supply costs and DH told her he would think about it if she provided receipts. She refused to provide receipts but gave us an itemized list of what she spent; including $40 for a lunch box and $60 for a backpack. Not exactly Mrs. Bargain Shopper. Needless to say, we didn't pay a dime because she never gave us a store receipt. That's why he pays CS.
Peanut, as the photographer
Peanut, as the photographer you own the copyright to those pictures. Copyright infringement is illegal and you can take BM to court for stealing your pictures. Just an FYI.
Do you, by chance, know if
Do you, by chance, know if this applies to school pictures? BM ordered school pictures and then scanned and emailed them to everyone. She rubbed it in DH's face that he wasn't getting any of the originals. It seemed very wrong to me for her to scan them, but we never took any action. I'm not sure that we even could since they weren't ours, but you catch my drift?
OH, and she soon realized that we had ordered our own picture package without her knowledge.
Yes school pictures are
Yes school pictures are copyrighted. She paid for the prints but unless she had written permission she can't make copies.
plan accordingly. ok, sure.
plan accordingly. ok, sure. kinda sounds like when my prison bitch of an ex called my gramma wanting to know where i work so he wouldn't apply for a job at the same place. uh, ok. the only place willing to take him is places that hire greaseballs, like a greasy fast food joint, and i don't work there. furthermore, he has never been interested in a job. he was just being f'g nosy and as usual, trying to find things out about me. that is all bm is doing, too. she doesn't have an actual reason to want to know what the kids do with you, she just wants to be a controlling pain in the ass.
as for pictures, you don't owe her shit. why doesn't she ask you for toilet paper and dishsoap while she's at it, too? she has just as much of right to those things as she does YOUR pictures. dumb ass. she's grasping at straws for some kind of control. i do hope you and dh are laughing and amused by this!
I would NOT provide a
I would NOT provide a detailed itinerary of my weekend. Hell, I don't even have one!
As far as the pics go...meh. I'd probably send a few good ones now and then.
I can tell you how I feel
I can tell you how I feel coming in as both a SM and a BM. If you can share pictures of your kids that's wonderful. It is a part of the child's life that you are missing out on. And sometimes it's great to have that when you don't have the children during the times they are with the opposite parent. BM (crazy bitch) sends us pictures all the time and we would do the same if she wanted. I think this is a pick and choose your battles.
I used to feel like - HELL NO
I used to feel like - HELL NO - when BM asked for pictures of SD17. But I am currently in the process of changing my opinion. My situation is completley different though. BM was not a part of SD's life for 6 years - she did not know her from 9 years old to 15. Additionally almost all the childhood pictures BM had of SD were destroyed by ex-husband #4. I don't have copies of all the pictures that were destroyed, but I have some. I don't think it would do me any harm in scanning/copying pictures and sending them to her. I know it would mean a lot to her.
Mind you, I was absolutely against the idea when she first asked 1 1/2 years ago. But over time I have let go of a lot of the hurt and pain I was carrying, so it does not feel as important of a battle anymore.
I agree with others - don't give your daily agenda/activities - that just seems a bit much!! But maybe, one day, if you happen to take a really fabulous picture of the girls, you could make a copy for them to share with her. Sometimes a little thoughtfulness goes a long way.
BM asked for pictures that
BM asked for pictures that SS3 had gone to her and ranted and raved about at Christmas time. He had a few that he wanted to keep- one of which was with his father and I- SS and Bio Dad asked me to be in the pic, I was not going to refuse- funniest thing ever was when SS took his that he holds all the time and snuck it home to BM. She found it doing laundry and FLIPPED bc SS leaned his head onto my shoulder and it looks so CUTE!
LOL- she has stopped asking for pics from BD because everyone he sends he makes sure either he or I are in it with SS. Stops her from being so nosy as to what we do. We don't ask her what she does, she has no right to know what we do. Our time is our time, her time is her time. We told her she needs to make her own memories and not live through ours.
Nicely played!
Nicely played!
I like sending pictures to
I like sending pictures to the crazy BM. she hardly ever makes time to see her kids, and I love showing her how much fun they are having living with us! Might seem a little nasty, but through all the shenanagins that we have had over the many many years, it gives me a little bit of satisfaction.
Wow she is a controlling
Wow she is a controlling woman, can't she just ask the kids like anyone else does, sounds like she is asking you both to be a pa for her lol, you could take some of you all looking sooooooooooooooo happy then maybe she won't ask anymore?