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SS won't play with other kids!!!

Auberry2's picture

Ok, So, I have notice that my SS doesn't seem to do well with other children in my family, but I chalked it up to him not knowing my son's cousins and little friends well and figured he would warm up after a while. I have mentioned before on here how he seems to only want to interact with adults, but I kept thinking maybe I was imagining things, maybe he was just uncomfortable around children he didn't know well and that was the problem. Except, he has been sharing a room with my BS for half a year and he would still rather interact with me or his dad than just play with BS. Easter was a bit of an eye opener for me, because FDH's family had a big egg hunt for the kids and all of SS's cousins were there to play with. I thought surely he would run and play with all of his cousins. But he didn't. He st at the dinner table with the grown ups and played LEGO's and interupted grown up talk and basically commanded the table. All the other kids were playing, some were playing outside, some were playing LEGO's in the den away from the grown ups, some were on the back porch playing games, I didn't hardly see my BS all day, he saw those kids and took off, running and playing like there was no tomorrow. Not so my SS. He only want to interact with grown ups, all day. He followed me around for a while, and when I dared suggest he go play with the other kids he gave me the dirtiest look ever and the other adults at the table acted like I had said something awful and immediately started interacting with him more. I don't get it. In my family, children do not sit at the table with the grown ups while the adults are visiting, it isn't allowed. The kids go run and play, the sdults visit, and then we all sit down to eat together. I don't get it. Does anyone else have a child who prefers the company of adults? It just doesn't seem normal, and it is downright annoying. You can't sit and have grownup conversation with children sitting there interupting you every fifteen seconds. La, it just seems so strange

momagainfor4's picture

since sd12 is the oldest grandkid on my bf's side... and bm's side.. she has been allowed to pretend to be an adult. This is an issue like you stated. Most kids I know can't wait to get away from the grownups!
Not sd12. At times, I think it's bc she's the center of attention and can commandeer the conversation!! My bf seems to thinks she is genuinely interested. If that were the case she wouldn't come up with random statements that have nothing to do with the topic at hand. Or she wouldn't be trying to swing from the rafters.. look at me look at me!
Or hanging on her dad.. which is totally my job!! Blum 3 I'm not sure why ppl let these kids get by with this. MY kids.. i'd have run them off!!!
My mom would have squirted us with a water hose Wink

Anon2009's picture

Honestly, he kind of sounds like me when I was growing up. Only I didn't interrupt or treat others rudely. If the adults who are hosting the event want to let him sit at the table with grownups, that is their choice, but your DH needs to rein him in when he starts acting up and treating others rudely.

The not wanting to play with other kids is common among kids who have Asperger's Syndrome. I have it, and his not wanting to play with other kids resonated with me. I'm not saying he has Asperger's, but it might be something reading up on a little, and having DH read up on it too. Here's a link to give DH: http://kidshealth.org/parent/medical/brain/asperger.html

If SS has any of these symptoms DH really should get him help.

Auberry2's picture

Anon2009,
That is something to keep an open mind about and eyes open for. I don't think he really has the symptoms, other than preferring adult interaction to his peers. I have a stepsister with AS, and (I understand, everyone's symptoms can present differently) for her, it was obvious that something wasn't right. When we found out what it was everything clicked into place and we were all so relieved because now we knew what was going on. If SS were to have AS, at least then I would have a little more understanding for his behavior...

dledden's picture

I agree with some of the above posts, ss may have a mild form of autism such as asperger's syndrome. My ss8 has autism. He will play with other kids, but mostly he just goes outside with them, then they play and he stims. yesterday he spent the entire day in the house playing on his dad's computer and playing the wii. NO interaction with my kids or the neighborhood kids AT ALL. Zero. Autism sure is a strange spectrum. Have him tested Smile