My stepdaughter was a joy when her mother was barely around. When I first met my BF’s kids, the BM was homeless and unable to care for the kids. She was barely able to visit them. I felt sorry for the little girl because her hair was never combed and her mom was never at cheerleading practice with her. When I came into her life, I began to do some creative hairstyles for her so they would last the whole week and she wouldn’t feel self conscious about her hair. I would even walk over to the cheerleading practice area to cheer her on. My BF’s kids both ran track and their mom would never come to their meets. One weekend, after my BS’s Tball game, I rented a car so I could drive out of town for extra support for the kids since their mom couldn’t be there. I began to help my BF out and dropped off/picked up his kids from school. We all moved in together shortly before this time. This is when the jealousy began. The BM was more concerned about our relationship than her kids. Then she began to tell me BF that I was not their mom so why do I need to take them to school. She then started to catch an early bus so she could make her presence known at the school. Last year when I would see my SD at school she would run up to me and hug me and ask if I could sit in her classroom. After I would spend time in my youngest BS’s class, I would spend time in hers. Now the BM has become more stable and has shared custody. She gets the kids on the weekends beginning Friday after school. Now when I pick my BS up from school and see my SD, she turns her head the other way. If I see her on the weekend and my older BS and SS’s football game, she’ll just walk right by me with no acknowledgement. This hurts me because I have taken time away from my own kids who I know love and care for me to invest time into her. I help her with her homework, buy her clothes, comb her hair, provide for her financially in ways that her BM doesn’t. I even notice that she doesn’t hug me goodnight anymore. Could it be that she’s never had genuine feelings for me, I was just a replacement until her mom grew up? I know I am an adult and she is a child, but I am only human and I do not want to grow ill feelings against this child. I know if that happens, I would have to make a decision to leave my relationship. I have talked to my BF about it, but he doesn’t have much to say. I just can’t help but think this child just uses me at her convenience. I am pretty sure her mom has something to do with it. She made my SD feel bad because she wanted to sleep in the bed with me when her dad was out of town. She has been sleeping with me for years. Even if her mom says bad things about me, it just seems like it would be hard for a child that truly cares about me would be so cold. I mean, she literally sticks her nose up in the air when she is with her mom. I just don’t know what to do about it…should I have a heart to heart conversation with her myself or just bring it up to my BF in hopes that he addresses it? It’s funny because I never thought a child other than my own could hurt my heart like this. I just want to be respected the way I deserve to be.