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Back Child Support

RaeRae's picture

Submitted by RaeRae on Sun, 01/23/2011 - 8:27pm

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Family Court

My exH and I have been divorced/separated for 4 years. I have only just made an appointment with child support services. I was terrified of him when I left him and it took a long time to get over that fear. He always made threats about how he would take my kids, he would file false charges, etc.

Would I be able to request back child support, or will they only start child support from the date I file? I feel he owes me and the kids, I worked 3rd shift for 3 years to give my kids a home, clothing and food, with rarely any help from him. I've seen where women have 'surprised' men with a 10 year old kid, and an order for 10 years worth of back child support... would my case be any different? Other than we were married, he knew about the kids, and he just didn't pay-and I was too scared to file?

ddakan's picture

Submitted by ddakan on Sun, 01/23/2011 - 9:12pm

If he was required to pay it in the divorce decree and never paid it, you are entitled to receive the back pay. If child support was not ordered, then you will have to make a new request.

somerg's picture

Submitted by somerg on Sun, 01/23/2011 - 10:53pm

if he was ordered to pay it then yes you'll get it EVENTUALLY but if not.....that's just something that'll have to be sucked up...i am in the same position...10 years divorced 2 remarried, and have yet to get a child support payment....just got an order through so i'll be getting one soon

RaeRae's picture

Submitted by RaeRae on Mon, 01/24/2011 - 6:52am

Sucks.... I got the divorce without mentioning the kids. There is no way to prove his abuse, or his threats. No way I could afford an attorney now. Guess he wins again.

sullyland's picture

Submitted by sullyland on Wed, 02/02/2011 - 10:42am

So my husband was never married to his son's BM, she got preg after one month of casual botty calls and he's been paying for not wearing a condom ever since. She has two kids both different dad's and same story casual botty calls then preg. Anyway, my husband did the child support calculation on line and had been paying her every month (not established legal paternity at that point), he also pays the boys insurance and about 2 years ago the boy started going to a private school she choose and wanted my husband to pay ALL of the $500.00 mo tuition. He did but told her he would have to reduce the $650.00 mo support to $400.00 to afford it--she agreed to this then last August took him to court to establish paternity and collect back support!! UNBELIEVABLE!! Turns out since BM never works just lives off her kids support money--that my husband has to pay 81% of all parenting costs (we have the boy 50%) and she got him for $4,200.00 back support. DES just froze our bank account and took all but $250.00 of our money without notice---the court arrangements through the clearing house were that we could pay an additional $100.00 per mo for the back support--but DES states they always have the option to put a lein on assets for back support---- HAS ANYONE ELSE GONE THROUGH THIS HELL? It's bad enough that the court system treats step parents like second class citizens and does not allow us to attend hearings or mediation sessions but GEEZ!!! When will this nightmare stop??

overit2's picture

Submitted by overit2 on Wed, 02/02/2011 - 10:49am

How do you get a divorce w/out mentioning the kids? Is that allowed in any state?

Best to consult an attorney on this one.

RaeRae's picture

Submitted by RaeRae on Wed, 02/02/2011 - 12:12pm

We had an agreement through a religious official about child support and custody of the children. It was stated in the DD that the divorce was amicable and there was an agreement (although not official and through the court) about the children. I'd get an attorney if I could, but there's no way I can right now.

overit2's picture

Submitted by overit2 on Wed, 02/02/2011 - 12:17pm

Hmmm, not sure about that...is it notarized at least? It should be enforceable if there is some kind of third party? You know another option is to go IN PERSON to the court house and ask the state clerk about it-show her what you have and ask their opinion. Sometimes they can check w/a judge and let you know w/in a few days. OR you can go to Child support enforcement and ask them. I suspect you may get a more accurate response from the clerks, not to mention more competent, quick....they can pretty much help w/what the judge could recognize.

I wouldn't call though-I would go in-with all papers-the agreement signed by the religious official, the DD as well.

RaeRae's picture

Submitted by RaeRae on Thu, 02/03/2011 - 9:21am

It's not notarized. I don't have a copy, but I'm trying to get a copy from them at the moment, hopefully I'll have it before my interview with CSE. I was pretty stupid really, for counting on them in the first place.

RaeRae's picture

Submitted by RaeRae on Fri, 02/04/2011 - 10:08am

Thanks for that, I am going to try for sure. I worked hard to keep a roof over my kids heads while he was out smoking pot and doing girls. I don't care about his personal life at all, it is just unfair for my kids and for me, that we struggled while he was out living it up. Not only not paying child support, but also not taking the kids to give me a break (he's not an 'every other weekend' type dad. He's the 'dictate over the phone' type).

somerg's picture

Submitted by somerg on Fri, 02/04/2011 - 10:10am

from the date the ORIGINAL court order was filed, he owes before that...he's scott free :sick: