You have to speak with you bf and ask him what it is in particular that bothers him about your boys? Is he being unreasonable or does he have a genuine point to make? And the same goes for you and his children. Be honest about it but stick to facts to get your point accross.

As a bio mum and a step mother to 2 adult step children, I would definitely say If I had my time again I would have made sure I knew what I was getting into right from the start. I was in love and a bit blind to all that was going on around me I suppose.

Anyway, If I were you I'd take some time out for the both of you and have a plan of action for when the kids are with you. You both need to be seen to be on the same side or both sets of children will quickly work out how to play you against each other.

Good luck to you.

I agree with both of the previous posts. you should ask BF what specifically bothers him about your kids and you should tell him the same about his. Then if it can't be resolved, then you do your own thing with your kids and he do the same with his. Simple compromise.

You said that your boyfriend is ready to leave you over this??? So its safe to assume its a big problem thats already been talked about lots of times? The only thing I can really say is you two need to have a real heart to heart without attacking or being defensive, realizing that if a compromise can't be reached then you will really part ways.

Try to let any past resentment go because without doing this any relationship is doomed. Come up with a step by step game plan together as a team to decide what you can do when x, y, z happens. Start small and aim for bigger goals as time goes on. Talk to the children to see if there is a bigger problem lurking.

Fight for your relationship if its worth it. If its mutually agreed that the relationship is more harm than good, step away from is as gracefully as you can for the sake of your kids. Easier said than done.... I know!