Seriously! Is this really how its going to be?
Well I need some advice before I go crazy. Long storly short. BM likes me sometimes and sometines not. We're at a NOT stage rigth now. She can be very mean and nasty when she wants to be. Or when she feels backed in a corner her claws come out. This last issue all started over a birthday party. Some people from mt SD school are having a big birthday party for 3 of their daughters. Almost everyone from their classes is going. Sounds fun for kids, and not so much for adults. But it is our day with the kids so me and my DH are taking them. BM can NOT STAND the fact that all these people are going to be at this childs party and she's not going to be there.......We already knew it was going to happen. This isn;t the first time. This is the third! My DH told BM that it is our day and we are taking the kids. We share the kids 50-50. The next week when the kids came back my SD told her dad that I was mean to her mom. WHAT! I don't even talk to the woman. My SD said that her mom would be sad if she didn't go to the party and it must have been me that said she couldn't go. MY SD is 6. I just told my SD that I loved her mommy and I would never do anything to hurt her and that she didn't need to worry about it. She seemed to be comforted with that. ANyways my DH called BM and told her to stop trying to munipulate this poor child so she can go to a child's BDay party. He told her that the mom should be worried and the childs feeings....not the other way around. BM said she never said those things and that she WAS going to the party because SD wanted her to. This is the 3rd BDay party she has shown up to on our days. Its embarrassing. What should we do? There is NO gettign through to her. We've tried everything. We do not interfere on her days ever. We've told her that and she doesn't care. We would do the same thing to show her what it feels like but we don't want to play dirty. UHHH!
Us too
Wow, that happened alot with us too, It is embarrassing, when BM shows up...but sometimes I embarrassed for her. She looks like an idiot. Then BM would take lots of pictures,,,(usually we dont even carry a camera) and acts like the life of the party, or hangs on the ss, like he needs her.
Once a friend, who was also the host. went up to her and said,,,"Oh you dont have to stay, the Dad is here"
Its stupid and embarrassing but I dont think you should worry about it..You walk in with the child,, she looks like the jerk not you.. the child goes home with you..She goes home alone.
Its so dumb
We had this problem with BM
We had this problem with BM pretty often until I put my foot down and started playing dirty without hurting the kids. We have full physical custody because BM never wanted to be a part my SD and SS life until I entered the picture. Anyway, she would learn of activities and would crash them and always try to cause a scene. I decided that whenever we knew she was aware of something we would come up with something way more fun and cool to do with the kids "last minute" so they didn't have to lose out and she could cause a scene all by her idiot self. The kids were never the wiser and she was furious. She eventually realized she couldn't pull the crap anymore and now we have no problem with her and her trashy behavior. I realize your party is probably over with but maybe someone else reading can learn from my experiences.
Thanks never ending
Hey thanks Never Ending. I guess you're right. I'm just so sick of her always being there and there's nothing we can do about it. But you're right she's the one that looks like an idiot. I just know it's going to be a lifetime of munipulation and struggles. I lived through it. My parents are divorced and it's hard when one parent makes decisions based on their feelings and emotions and not the child's. I'll hang in there. I love my skid's and my husband enough to stick it out through all the drama. Thanks
Why would anyone
go to a child's birthday party that they don't have to go to?!?! I don't even want to go to SDs party this weekend! Of course, it's a BMs house and we already had a party at our house, but I digress.
I agree with NE, she'll look like the insecure, neurotic mom. Just hold your head up high and ignore her as much as you can justify.