Bring the popcorn... it's about to go down with the BM.. in court
So after much deliberation DH has had enough of BM not sticking to the CO. We are only supposed to have the kids two overnights (weekends) in the CO. But BM says she cannot find daycare for SD where she lives and refuses to rearrange her bar-tending schedule so we have SD for 5 days a week and SS on the weekends. He pays her full child support since she is the "custodial parent" AND we pay $500 a month for SD's daycare. We met with a lawyer today and she was shocked. According to pay scales in the state BM should be paying DH $654 dollars a month since we have the SD 5 days plus daycare. Lawyer is sending an official letter for recalculations of CO and Child Support next week. Knowing BM she is going to go postal and most likely try to go for full custody even though our lawyer says she has very little chance in winning that. She constantly drops her kids off at her dads when its supposed to be her days so she can go out and party. SS's school has sent home numerous notes that he is constantly late for school. and she is a habitual weed smoker, the kids clothes reek of it when they come to our house.
So all I guess I can do now is sit back and enjoy the show-- and the inevitable drama that is about to ensue. Any advice from similar experiences is always welcome!
- danielsj2's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
All the same BM? Why can SS
All the same BM? Why can SS come weekends but SD has to come weekdays?
Yes same BM. SD is too young
Yes same BM. SD is too young for school so she has to go to daycare. BM cant find or is unwilling to pay for daycare so we have to take her wed-sun when BM works. SS is in school so she has her dad pick him up from school and keep him usually thurs when she works. They live 2 1/2 hours away from us.
Yes we pay her full child
Yes we pay her full child support and we have to pay the $500 bill for daycare for SD 3 days a week. SD is with BM Mon and Tues only and BM doesn't work those days so she can watch her or she drops her off at her dads.
If y'all live 2.5 hours away
If y'all live 2.5 hours away from each other, it seems like it makes the most sense for one parent to have the kids during the week, primary custody, and the other to have weekends. Since having to commute that far for a school day seems excessive. Is that what you're going for? to have both kids during the week for school and allow her to have weekends?
Ideally yes--since we can
Ideally yes--since we can provide before and after school care during the week. The issue is if she only gets them on the weekends she will never see them. She is a bartender and refuses to give up her weekend shifts.
The kids would essentially never see their mother. And the original CO does state that the kids are supposed to be with her all week and we get them on the weekends-but BM does not adhere to that.
get the kids tested for
get the kids tested for drugs.... if she's smoking with them in the house they will pick up a small trace of weed in their blood and hair..
that alone should get them out of there
This is true. DH doesnt want
This is true. DH doesnt want to take her kids from her but she needs to grow up and start being a real parent.
he would rather allow his
:jawdrop: :jawdrop: he would rather allow his kids to inhale weed then to take them out of the environment?
I am sorry he's not worth being called a father then, I will do everything to get my kids away from that situation, she's into weed, not serious drug, she leaves them with family member to party...
instead of taking the kids in raise them in a normal home...?
WTF..... even in Mars....
:jawdrop: :jawdrop: :jawdrop: WTF.....
even in Mars.... they can ask the court to do hair analysis on minor children to test for drug, and if it's positive the CP will loose their status...
it does show up in the hair
it does show up in the hair somehow....
we just did a test lol.... My brother smokes... and it is traced in his son's hair... my brother asked for the test to proof to us it's not happening.. well guess who sits with the egg on his face...
they say it's not because of the kid smoking weed, but he's in the area of some one else smoking... and it's medical weed prescribed....
yes he smokes every day.....
yes he smokes every day..... and kid is his shadow.... it's been 10 years...
We have tried before--somehow
We have tried before--somehow she always gets out of it.
Do you live in a state where
Do you live in a state where marijuana is legal? I don't know the rules on it in those states...but I'm sure the kids testing positive would be a major issue wither way.
Virginia
Virginia
regardless if it's legal or
regardless if it's legal or not.....
it remains against the law for minor children to smoke or drink, and smoking laws are so strict over here, I'm not even allowed to smoke in my own home if there's minor children in it... not in a vehicle....
This has been going on since
This has been going on since SD was born. BM was arrested for showing up to DH's house and spitting on the baby--she said it was accidental. The letters ar ebeing sent legally which will start a court process.
BM spit on her OWN baby? I
BM spit on her OWN baby? I mean, spitting on any baby is vile, but spitting on your own child? That's insane.
Yep. She was arrested for
Yep. She was arrested for that and being drunk in public--the magistrate also read her the riot act for being intoxicated while breastfeeding as well. She is a piece of work. She claimed she meant to spit on DH but he was holding the baby so she spit on the baby.
Here's a fun fact for you. At
Here's a fun fact for you. At least in the state I live in spitting on someone is considered SEXUAL ASSAULT. Yep because it is an attack with bodily fluids. Now not sure how it would go over in court but hey just thought the fact was cool.
Really? I guess that kinda
Really? I guess that kinda makes sense.. here spitting is considered assault.. not sure about sexual assault tho
Just be ready because when
Just be ready because when she gets served she is going to stop giving SD to y'all during the week and she will also probably run out and place her in a daycare or enroll her in a preschool.
Yep we are already prepared
Yep we are already prepared for this. Lawyer made sure that we understood that she will prob ramp up the crazy and to save all texts, emails, vm's. No communication about money--that has to go through the lawyers. Strictly conversation regarding pick up and drop offs. But I honestly don't think she can find daycare.. with all the money we give her she still cannot pay her bills cause she goes out on the town after her shifts every weekend.