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I just WANT to start with BM sometimes.

AJanie's picture

DH's worker's comp checks resumed a few weeks back after a hiatus. BM's garnishment, for whatever reason, is late - still not on her card. It is garnished on our end. DH made all the phone calls and straightened it out, so he thought. Lawyer said it might take a few days.

She called my house at 8:00 AM (DH was at a dr. appt. so couldn't answer cell). I didn't pick up the phone. DH texted me that she is flipping out about her child support.

It is so tempting to text her and ask her to refrain from calling my house before 9:00 AM unless it is an emergency.

I shouldn't, right?

Comments

AJanie's picture

Thanks, Clever. I would like to dress up as a scary clown and bang on the whores windows. BUT I think I will just go to work instead...

taking the high road.

AJanie's picture

You're right... happy thoughts. I need to glue the serenity prayer to that phone. So infuriating seeing her name come up so early in the AM!

Tuff Noogies's picture

vent away! i'd be tempted to try to block her number from the landline, she has no need to be dialing that number.

zerostepdrama's picture

The high road is always better. Sometimes harder to take but worth it. I've been doing it for years with BM and my Ex with only a few minor slip ups.

(((HUGS)))

AJanie's picture

Always more, Granny. She never calls with anything about the kids - activities, upcoming school events, anything to include DH in any meaningful way. It is about her struggle, her needing more, it not being "as much as she deserves" ... etc.

Never does it seem to cross her mind that they are in school so she could certainly pick up a day job. If someone gave me $800 month I could certainly take care of those 2 kids. She is fortunate to have free state medical, no childcare bills, etc. But she is so focused on "how hard it is." why? I do not get it. Maybe because I am not a mother. I don't know.

CLove's picture

Our Bm, texted SO at 10:30 at night, because she was out late (new BF#2) and her convertible top would not shut. She asked if SO could "come over, like now? LOL." I was furious. Got her number on my phone and was SO READY to ask her to please refrain from texting her EX HUZ to come over late at night, it is inappropriate. But common sense took over before I pressed "send".

Trying to keep things calm takes a lot of energy. I am just waiting for my turn!!!

tankh21's picture

Yeah I can't wait until 2026 when DH doesn't have to deal with BM anymore. I am counting down the days. It is very hard to sit back and not be able to say anything to BM.

NoWireCoatHangarsEVER's picture

Don't fear the bear. Or poke it. Cause if she is this bad all on her own then if you poke the bear it's going to go crazy crazy worse. Remember your BM
And mine are personality disordered. They don't operate like you and me. Read that book Understanding the Borderline mother. Read the chapter on the queen. I downloaded it for free on my kindle from the library

CLove's picture

Winona SD18 mentions now and then that her mother is borderline. She takes anti-depressants with alcohol, and other stuff, to stay sort of solid. I need to read that book!

Pharlap's picture

Girl, I feel ya. Sometimes it helps me to open my email and write out a nasty response with every name in the book, telling her what I really think of her self given title of "good mother", especially when she drags me into her petty crap she starts with DH on occasion, and not send it. Therapeutic lol.