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The amazing and wonderful world of curse words!

Ninji's picture

Submitted by Ninji on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 1:52pm

SS11 got in trouble today at school for saying freaking and has been in trouble in the past for saying jerk in school. I don't necessary consider these curse words but the school does and he gets in trouble for it.

I personally love to curse. The F word is one of my favorite words. I believe sometimes nothing really conveys the way you feel like some well-placed curse words.

So, my advice to SS has been that he needs to learn when and where certain words are appropriate. I can't just drop F bombs at work or in church and he has to learn that he can't be using this language in front of adults until he gets older and even then he will have to watch what he says in certain company. I told him is not being very ninja and he needs to work on that.

I figure boys are going to try out cursing. It's pretty harmless and I rather teach him when and where to use different words than punish him.

So, steptalkers, what is your rule on tweens and teens using curse words?

Comments

ESMOD's picture

Submitted by ESMOD on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 1:59pm

Using curse words is a sign that you aren't smart enough to express yourself intelligently... what my Mom always said.

The only time/place that I think using these words is in in extreme situations like hitting your thumb with a hammer.

To be honest, when I hear people use curse words in casual conversation, my opinion of them drops. I occasionally do use a bad word...not perfect, but really try to not make it anywhere near a habit.

It's too easy for the wrong word to come out at the wrong time if you are comfortable using the words.

Peridwen's picture

Submitted by Peridwen on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:00pm

Jerk and freaking are curse words to the school? Wow! I'd have been tossed out on my ear at 11. That was right around the time I discovered British fiction and a whole new world of curses!

Ninji's picture

Submitted by Ninji on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:04pm

His teacher made his write Jerk 700x's because he kept saying it. I personally, think that is the opposite of what she should have done. He was just sitting at the table saying jerk to himself every time he wrote it. Seems to me the exercise just reinforced the word than anything.

Ninji's picture

Submitted by Ninji on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:09pm

I was on the fence about it when he started doing it but by the time he was finished I told DH he was absolutely never doing it again.

ESMOD's picture

Submitted by ESMOD on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:18pm

It may not have been considered a curse word... but maybe more along the lines of zero tolerance for bullying?

Ninji's picture

Submitted by Ninji on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:23pm

You may be correct. We have had to deal with him bullying younger kids. The jerk situation happened when he lived with his mom so I'm sure of the exact context. He lives with us now and the freaking happened today. I'm going to have another conversation with him today.

BethAnne's picture

Submitted by BethAnne on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:02pm

I agree with you. I think that curse words have their place and are a useful part of language. However it is not always appropriate to use them and they loose their impact if used frequently. Right now my sd knows a lot of curse words because my husband does not censor himself around her but she knows that it is not acceptable for children to use them (she is 9). I am sure we may have issues when she is older but we wil come to that when it happens.

Disneyfan's picture

Submitted by Disneyfan on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:03pm

If those teachers punish students for saying jerk and freaking, they would freak the hell out if they were in my school.

There's a time and place for everything, but I can't even imagine those words being on a teacher's radar

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:16pm

well if jerk and freaking are cuss words all three of the kids would have been in trouble long ago.

i think you gave him great advice! a woman here at work always says "know your audience and environment." wise words.

as far as our policy goes, no cursing from the kids. but they hear dh and i all the time. we used to censor ourselves until dh realized it was useless as they'd heard it all anyway all the time from dumb@$$, MIL, FIL, g-ma, g-pa, you name it. when kaos quoted The Hangover at age 6, and their mom routinely saying "get your f*cking @$$ in the car!" then there's really no point in censoring....

lurch slipped up a few times with the word H3ll. eh. he's 16. he'll say (literally) "Eff" or "what the freak?" or things of that nature. dh's feeling is "no cursing as a minor, and when you're legally an adult your language is your own thing to handle. but you better NEVER curse *AT* me or tuff, regardless of how old you are."

justanothergurlNJ's picture

Submitted by justanothergurlNJ on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:18pm

I didn't read the other responses. My rule has always been. NEVER curse at me. If we are having a conversation and you say" that kid is a f*&King jerk" I'm cool with that. DO NOT EVER CALL ME A CURSE WORD OR TELL ME TO GO F(*K OFF or any version of that shit I will knock you the F*&K out.

Second DO NOT EVER curse at a teacher or anyone in authority or anyone your elder. Again using the words in context while conversating and the person you're talking to is comfortable with it then fine.

If you're are going to curse in school with your at your peers and a school officials catches you and it is against their policy and you know it then you will accept your punishment by the school and that will be all nothing from my end.

That's pretty much it ohh and if you're going to say it you better be able to spell it.

SM12's picture

Submitted by SM12 on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 2:38pm

My XH and I used to tell our BS that we say the curse words for him so he doesn't have to. Hahaha

He was pretty good about not cursing in front of adults until he was around 17. Then he would throw out the occasional Fbomb.
I however, curse like a sailor as well and will do so in front of my parents. I learned it from my Dad so no one is particularly shocked.
Now BS19 has no issues saying whatever he wants in front of me. But he does understand when and wear to use bad words.

WalkOnBy's picture

Submitted by WalkOnBy on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 4:01pm

I swear like a sailor.

DD25's first word? Shit. Said at my mother's house and in proper context.

Thing1's first word? Fuck. Said at my mother's house and in proper context.

Thing2's first word? Dammittohell. Said at my mother's house and in proper context.

Yep - I am THAT mom Smile

Peridwen's picture

Submitted by Peridwen on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 8:44pm

LOl! My brother decided to clean up his language around his boys, so he's been using 'frikken' instead of the f-bomb. Well one day at Grandma's house, my 3yo nephew with pronunciation difficulties tripped on a toy truck and yelled at the top of his lungs "F@&$ing tuck!"

Luckyone's picture

Submitted by Luckyone on Wed, 02/22/2017 - 10:06pm

I was driving one day and my 18 month old was chattering away. I realized he was quietly saying "shittyfuckyhellhellhell". I was freaked out. Then I realized he only did it in the car becAuse that is where I did it!!! Now he is 26 and cusses a lot less than me. I drive a school bus so I can't cuss there, but when I step off I always have a string of cusses to let out.

Acratopotes's picture

Submitted by Acratopotes on Thu, 02/23/2017 - 2:36am

swearing - I've never done it in my life and my kid knows no swearing words.. Wink

the F word is used in our country like any other word... no one cares, but kids are not allowed to use it in school - really really stupid, I never had an issue with it, cause I don't swear at home....

The only thing I taught Deigma - you never tell some one to eff off, you never swear at a person... and if i ever catch you using those words below the belt you will be sorry....