You're obviously going to have to become color blind. No matter how you slice it, you will be doing those kids a terrible injustice if you can't look at them the same as you could a white kid.

As unfortunate as it seems, you will probably lose friends because of it. My nephew is black. I brought him to a football game to watch my daughter cheer. All of the other cheerleader moms that I thought were my friends stopped talking to me. I learned that day that they weren't worth my time. You're going to come to that same crossroad at some point.

You are going to have to put their color aside and realize they bleed just as red as you do. You're going to have to see them for who they are and not their color. You can start by introducing them to the things that you like to do and offer to do some things that they like to do.

If you can't do that, your relationship is doomed. Don't compound it by agreeing to move in together.

Why would you have these feelings toward the kids, who had no say about who their parents were, but not your girlfriend? She's the person who made the choices that contradict with the way that you "were raised".

Please be honest with you GF about the way you were raise and your feelings. Then do everything you can to keep your family away from her boys.

If she's smart, she will walk away from this relationship.

I appreciate your honestly. And although you can see fault in the beliefs you were taught, you still have a concern for how others perceive you.
The fact is, Biracial children are now quite normal. I think one thing you need to understand is, your lack of common interests with the Stepchildren has nothing to do with race. It has to do with upbringing and the childs interests. The child could be the same race as you and still not enjoy the outdoors.

One thing you can consider is trying to take the child out and see how he takes to the things you enjoy.
My BS was never exposed to mechanical things, soccer, shooting or out-door activities. But my DH (his StepDad) introduced him to all of those things and they are tight as you can be now.

But I do understand it is hard to just look past what you were taught all those years. If you really don't feel you can be around these children without concern for what others think, then please end the relationship and allow these children to be around people who love and accept them for who they are.
Good luck to you

I appreciate your honestly. And although you can see fault in the beliefs you were taught, you still have a concern for how others perceive you.
The fact is, Biracial children are now quite normal. I think one thing you need to understand is, your lack of common interests with the Stepchildren has nothing to do with race. It has to do with upbringing and the childs interests. The child could be the same race as you and still not enjoy the outdoors.

One thing you can consider is trying to take the child out and see how he takes to the things you enjoy.
My BS was never exposed to mechanical things, soccer, shooting or out-door activities. But my DH (his StepDad) introduced him to all of those things and they are tight as you can be now.

But I do understand it is hard to just look past what you were taught all those years. If you really don't feel you can be around these children without concern for what others think, then please end the relationship and allow these children to be around people who love and accept them for who they are.
Good luck to you

I really commend you for bringing up this difficult topic which instantly cuts deep. I take it your girlfriend is not black? Clearly they are a part of her as well as her history of having been with a non-white guy. This will never change, you must know that. But what MUST change is the way you feel a about them. As someone had commented earlier, it isn't the kids fault what color they were born. It also sounds las though you are making excuses by citing examples of the cultural differences you are presuming. Whether the kid is white, black, yellow...whatever, you are clearly backing away from shared experience from them because of, their race. It is hard enough to be a non-bio guardian of kids as it is, but your excuses & fears are sabotaging you before you get out of the gate. Again, awareness is the first step, but if you truly are the Man you proport to be then I would advise you to be honest with your woman before she believes you to be someone you are not. I would recommend couples therapy stat! You owe that to her & those kids before you expose them to your intolerant family which will break your bond anyway if you're not prepared. Good luck and again I really liked your honesty which gives me a glimmer of hope for your relationship!

You are living in your own house and GF and her kids are living in her own place...

You obviously have a skin color issue, thus I would strongly say never move in with GF.... she can visit you...

In the mean time try and change your upbringing... it's really easy, I can't believe in this day and age there's still people thinking... white and black.... it's just really silly...

Now before you think I have no clue what I'm talking about, I'm from Africa, and I'm white, I grew up during apartheid years, and war.... my country got independent, apartheid was cancelled... suddenly age 17 we went to mix schools...
shared the same bathrooms, dined in the same restaurants... and you know what...black people are human beings just like us.... I had no problem integrating from all white to mixed, my parents had no problem with it either (maybe because we where on a farm and that was the norm, not like city life)

I have no problem with my kid having black friends.... and most of his black friends have way better manners then the white friends... yes they listen to rap, they talk slang, but in my house I will correct all off them regardless skin color, you will not talk ghetto in my house.

So take off your rose white glasses and get into 2017.