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New here and have a few questions…

JstaSM's picture

New here and have a few questions…

Some background, DH and I have been together for 25 years. Skids are 30, 28 and 27. We had the kids every weekend for the 1st 12 years we were together. That’s when we started having children and BM convinced then that the new baby would get all the attention. That DH would love the new baby more. She has rewritten history and the skis believe it all. When we had a 2nd child BM decided that she would seal the deal. She told the kids now there is no room for you. They only wanted you to play house. She calls me a Sl** and DH a sperm donor (since the beginning). They only refer to me as DH’s wife and SF as their father.

Church wedding was planned but we eloped and didn’t tell anyone. When it was time for the church wedding we sent out the invites and requested no presents just people to be there and have a good time. BM found out by finding our marriage license online (didn’t think she was smart enough) and told everyone. Then proceeded to tell the kids “they shouldn’t have kept it from you, they were wrong and family docent keep secrets like that.” BM took them out of state the week before the wedding and told us they wouldn’t be back in time. She got home and told them if we wanted them there then we could pick them us. Per YSD, SD asked to call us and BM wouldn’t let her. She told her that if we wanted them there we would pick them up.

I found out just recently that they were taking stuff from my house and giving it to BM. Pictures that we had of them, papers from my filing cabinet and my jewelry. I honestly thought I was losing my mind. I even saw BM wearing on of my tee-shirts that I wore to bed. Well BM started posting our pictures online. I know they are our pictures because they were taken at my family’s houses.

Fast forward to today. Skids want nothing to do with us because I stopped giving them money. When they had their kids DH would congratulate him. Now he doesn’t even know how many grandkids he has. They refer to him as sperm donor. They say he was never there for them.

Now on to my questions… what constitutes defamation? What constitutes a threat of violence? Will the skids ever see beyond the lies? Do any of you think that the grandkids would want to contact DH when they got older?

Comments

JstaSM's picture

Defamation… Writing lies on social media, a book website and n a newspaper. We didn’t see the articles in the paper because we had since moved. DH family saw it and instantly knew it was about her. She did an interview type thing. We found both articles when cleaning out his grandparents house. When we asked DH’s family why they didn’t tell us they said that no names were mentioned except her first name and a fake name for her BF at the time. They didn’t want to ruin the relationship between him and his kids. I don’t know. Dumb logic.

Threats… on social media she said she wanted to punch me in the throat and then someone offered to do it for her, told someone they should throw rocks at me.

JstaSM's picture

We just found the articles last year and I would have to say the threat was about 2 months ago. I just can’t believe that the kids would steal from us to give to their mother.

JstaSM's picture

Most of the jewelry was costume (one real gold ring). I couldn't prove that they took that one ring. I stopped handing out the cash.

JstaSM's picture

We eloped and didn't tell anyone. She went online and found the marriage certificate. We actually eloped in a different state. The reason we eloped was for us. We still got married in the Catholic Church when we had planned.

We have not had any contact in years. DH said that they need to apologize for all the stuff they said and did after everything that I did for them.

JstaSM's picture

The questions are because she has a HATE campaign out for me. It is to the point that she says that she is going to write a book and include us in it. I feel bad for DH that he doesn't get to see the grandkids, for our kids that don't get to have a relationship with their nieces and nephews.

Why do I have to be the one to hold my head up when I talked about and lied about? ok that part was just a rant. LOL

JstaSM's picture

We still married in the Catholic Church. BM actually called the church to try and make sure that we didn't marry in the altar. The priest asked her if she married him in the Catholic Church. She said no and he told her that we could.

JstaSM's picture

she does. It got to the point that she was telling him that she would NOT sign an annulment through the church. Surprise was on here. We didn't need one.

notsobad's picture

How bizarre that BM would want to wear your clothes. That's just the oddest thing!

JstaSM's picture

It is not about letting it go. I am worried that she will ruin my reputation. I have a very good job that I wouldn't want to lose because of her. The job I had when DH were 1st together I was almost fired because she constantly called me. I told the receptionist to tell her I was fired. So she followed me to work and when the receptionist told her I didn't work there she said " I saw her go in". After that she was just taken as a message.