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she got me again.

Annanymous's picture

I thought things were going well. We took her to the new psychiatrist and out to eat. Went shopping. We talked and she said she wanted to try harder and she was sorry.we have great day.

In van on the way home I ask if she has anything like a blade (I saw broken pencil sharpener earlier and well read her text to her friend about carrying a cutting blade).. she gives it to me and says some crap about its not bothering anyone and all this nonsense. So I tell her its dangerous and if you can't think of yourself, think of the results if this razor blade falls oit of your pocket and the baby picked it up or swallowed it. I wouldn't be looking for a razor blade in the house so if he got it and swallowed it he could die. I say this calmly and trying to get her to think outside her own pity party mentality. I say it calm and nice. Dh witness...

She texts four friends how I told her shes a loser and I dont give a f about her and she better not dare endanger my son or else.

Omfg what??? She took the conversation that was calm and trying to get her to think and twisted it to make up stuff about me AGAIN.

Psychiatrist put her on mood stabilizer today but takes five weeks. I can't do borderline disorder four more years and keep falling for her manipulations.

My own fault for falling for it. I should have told dh tk search her crazy ass and kept my mouth shut.

Will I ever learn.

Comments

Annanymous's picture

Dh thinks I shouldn't read the texts or cry over it but wouldn't you want to know if someone living in your house was making up stuff or twisting stuff and trashing you? I rather know than be stupid and blind.

I'm not exaggerating a y of this either. I wish I were. She hugged me and kissed me on the cheek and said love you so much! Within an hour of texting that about me.

I took pics of her texts. I need to learn to keep my mouth shut around this girl. Borderline personality disorder is no joke.

I am afraid a little with her having freaking razor blade in the house and having such spite and jealousy toward me and the baby.maybe she'll get me instead of slicing her poor little arm one day.

I have truly been amazing to her. I've done and said nothing to risk passing her off. Yet she will find anything to cry how unloved and pitiful she is and im such monster. I need surveillance seriously.

morethanibargainedfor's picture

Crazy how its so easy for them to make up lies isn't it?
BM told me once that SD told her that all I do is drink when she is at our house and I get drunk every time. I don't think I've ever laughed so hard in my life when she told me that. I have MAYBE 1 glass of wine a week! And the one glass usually takes me an hour to drink.
I hate dumb kids that lie for attention. Can't we just send them all to an island somewhere?

Annanymous's picture

It really is awful. Unfortunately, I can't leave and can't send her away. I try to send to to stay the night with friends as much as possible and now to her mother who she hadn't seen in three years. Now she trashes me to her too!

I shouldn't take it personally, but how do I not?

WhittySM's picture

Yikes. I ain't gonna lie, I'd be a little scared. The texts might just be a cry for attention and sympathy from her friends. But actually carrying around a razor blade, that crap is straight up psycho.

Annanymous's picture

She is 14-1/2. She scratched in 2012 during my last pregnancy then cut with broken glass she brought into the house the day we told her about this baby. Now she gets blade out of a pencil sharpener and carried in her pocket. Didn't use it just texted friends how she had it and threatened to cut.

I have a 15 month old she over professes adoration for in front of people but since I was pregnant with him she has been scary jealous and aggressive and nasty trashing me for things she exaggerated.

I'm pregnant now with my second boy (spina bifida diagnosed in unborn) and life revolves around her.

She manipulates me so easy - a hug and I love you mom im sorry I want a good relationship and I fall for it.

Annanymous's picture

Thank you. I am going to get books and join a BPD support group board online. I forgive and think she won't do it again...and then she does it again.

It's scary. I'm going to keep on my disengaging and keeping my mouth shut around her. Give her nothing to twist or manipulate.

just.his.wife's picture

I have an idea.. since she likes to LIE over texts and phone calls... Take the damn phone away. All phone calls must be supervised, all interactions with friends will be supervised until she can be TRUSTED not to lie her ass off!

Annanymous's picture

She can never be trusted. She had no phone for almost a year.

She told my friend neighbors and cousin and the therapist that I verbally abused her! Without the phone.

I just want to stay away from her.

noway70's picture

^^^^^THIS^^^^^
Also, what would happen if she made false claims to CPS?
You have a kind heart. But you need to protect yourself and your children.

Annanymous's picture

I know I already worry about false CPS claim. She already has been telling therapist I verbally abused her. She told teachers in 2012 that I push her against a wall and "judge her".

That's why I'm trying to keep away from her and keep my mouth shut. She's going whacko at school. She starts drama then cries that she's being bullied when the other people she manipulate get pissed off. she goes crying to the counselor daily.

I am not falling for it again. Keep mouth shut, stay away, and document.

She's starting Lamictal today. A mood stabilizer. I pray it helps.

Still, I have to protect myself and the baby.

I will make her empty her pocket and leave purse in garage.

ctnmom's picture

I would go to a homeless shelter with my baby. I'm serious. The clock is ticking down to when she hurts your child, and you're standing by waiting for it. MY kids would not be in a house with someone who has a razor on them.

Annanymous's picture

DH keeps saying it's nothing and she's just trying to get pity and attention.

I called her therapist, but they aren't returning my call (I'm the abusive stepmom remember too).

DH says just ignore it. I think I should check her pockets and bag when she comes home every day. No one thinks this is serious. I'm "overreacting".

I just joined the BPD support group and am looking for a book. Essentially the expectation is I stay out of her way and don't piss her off and if she comes at me and says "she feeeeels like I abuse her" I am to apologize for making her feel bad.

She says she is not thinking about killing herself or cutting herself when I ask her if she needs medical attention, then later says she laid in bed all night holding the blade thinking of ending her pain of neglect, abuse, abandonment, and everything by me and all the people at school bullying her.

i hope the therapist calls me back.

Jsmom's picture

OMG - She is worse than my SD17 who is Bi-polar and probably BPD. She is on a spiral and we have no relationship anymore because of the damage she did to the family.

Honestly, life is better with her out of the house. I can not handle a child that refuses to take her meds or live by any rules. I thought SD was bad, but the cutting and the lying yours is doing is worse. Mine lied, but at least she had the sense not to post it somewhere.

Annanymous's picture

I really don't know what to think. I worry and dh says I'm overreacting and she would not hurt the baby. He said she didn't use the blade on herself (this time she has befI'more!) And its nothing just attention just ignore her and dont even ask if she has it.

Am I overreacting and being petty? Should I not worry about a mentally unstable stepdaughter carrying a razor blade around in my house?

If I'm not overreacting, what can I do?? I can't get a hold of therapist. Dh says ignore and leave her alone. She hasn't a
made any physically threatening gesture YET. he says if she ever attacked us hed do something; if she makes big false allegations against me then he will do somethung but I'm just being dramatic.

Am i being dramatic over borderline teen carrying a razor blade? She tells people she wants to cut herself but knows to way she doesn't and isn't suicidal when we ask about it or dr asks. She knows if she says no we can't take her to hospital.