Please Save Me from SS14
I'm spending the day at home with SS14 while DH works. BS17 is also at work, so I don't even have a buffer. This kid is being SO. DAMN. DENSE I'm going to lose my mind. He's not super bright to begin with, has no common sense whatsoever, and I guess the close proximity for the past few days has just gotten my nerves frayed.
First, he's snorting and sneezing all over the house. Not washing his hands. I swear, if I wind up sick for the holidays and my vacation I will NOT be happy. He knows better. I asked him if he wanted some medicine for the sneezing and runny nose. His response?
"They make medicine for thaaaaaat?"
Really? Has this child never had cold medicine? I know damn well he does because I've been giving it to him for the last three years.
I tell him, why doesn't he use tissues for his nose instead of wasting all the paper towels. They're softer.
"They aaaaaaaare? I never noticed that."
And no, he's not purposely being difficult. He's just dense. He chooses to live isolated in his little fantasy world so he doesn't have to deal with anything. Therefore, he has no common sense.
Oh, and then there's the croutons. We were grocery shopping yesterday. It took him the entire trip to find a freakin' bag of croutons. He's been on many shopping trips with us. He's fetched many bags of croutons. They haven't moved.
Me: Oooookay, here's a hint. What do you eat croutons on?
SS: Uuhhhhhhh.......salad.
Me: yup. And are croutons refrigerated?
SS: Uuuuhhhhhhhhhhhh........
Me: where do we keep them?
SS: Uuuuhhhmmmmm, the top cupboard.
Me: So are they refrigerated?
SS: no.
Me: they why have you been wandering around the dairy case?
SS: *crickets and blank stare*
Me: Okay.....what else do you eat on salad?
SS: Uhhhhhh....ranch?
Me: right. Salad dressing. Soooo, the croutons would most likely be with the....
SS: *crickets and blank stare*
Me: never mind. Go get the milk.
And this is EVERY FRICKIN' conversation with this kid. He can NOT think for himself. I get it. He's never had to. BM tells him what to do, when to do it, how to do it, and holds his hand while he does it. But still...dear Lord. It's been like this all weekend long!
Just for fun, here are some things he's said in the recent past:
"So when I turn 13, that means I'll be a teenager?"
"If I put my feet up on the ottoman, they'll be higher than if they were on the ground. Huh! Cool."
Give me strength! Get me through this day! I like the kid, I really do, but my God, I can't tolerate the stupidity. If that makes me a bad person, then screw it, I'm bad! 
- GhostWhoCooksDinner's blog
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Comments
SS10 is going through a phase
SS10 is going through a phase of playing dumb. Someone in his world must think this is cute and funny, DH and I find no humor in it. I actually said, playing dumb is really unattractive....he didn't think and told me his Mom thinks it is. Nice, BM encourages this behavior. :sick:
Except he's not playing. He's
Except he's not playing. He's honestly this dim.
FauxSS9, however does play dumb. BM thinks it's sooooo adooooooooorable! :sick:
Scary.
Scary.
"Never mind, go get the
"Never mind, go get the milk"...funny!
Oh! And just a little while
Oh! And just a little while ago, when I was baking cookies, I burned a few. SS saw me toss them in the garbage and he's like, "are those no good?" "What do you think?" says I.
Honestly.
I know, right? If you know
I know, right? If you know the freakin' answer, why the hell did you ask??
Or there's this wonderful exchange:
DH: SS, where's your homework?
SS: Homework?
DH: Yeah, you know, the schoolwork you do at home? You had a science lab to write.
SS: Science lab?
DH: Did you bring it home?
SS: Uuuuuuuuuhhhhhh....bring it home?
DH: YES. DID. YOU. BRING. IT. HOME.
SS: the science lab?
DH bangs head against wall.
It's maddening. It's pretty much daily.
Oh head that's like talking
Oh head that's like talking to as7 NO common sense dense as a brick yet he's very smart on standardized tests. I told SO his son makes me want to pull my hair out he agreed which is sad he's as dense as his mother yet he could probably read circles around her.
If he was, I could
If he was, I could understand. But alas, no. Just dense. I'm positive there are no drugs involved. No learning disabilities, no anything. He's a product of his environment.
He looks exactly like DH, so
He looks exactly like DH, so no mistaking him. Unfortunately, he got his mother's brain power!
I suspect he has learned from
I suspect he has learned from his mother that to play cutesy makes you ADORABLE. And without anyone telling him otherwise he continues the game. Instead of asking him tell him...
"Get your backpack. It is in your room."
"Croutons, isle 5. Go. Now. 2 bags."
"Use a kleenex for all nose blowing. No arguments."
"Move faster. You are too slow."
"Yes your feet are higher. Keep lifting them so more blood runs back to your brain. You need all the help you can get!"
"Yes your feet are higher.
"Yes your feet are higher. Keep lifting them so more blood runs back to your brain. You need all the help you can get!"
ROFL! That was hysterical! Thanks for the laugh. I needed it! Maybe that's the secret....hmmm......Perhaps we should have bought him a recliner for Christmas!