Anyone ever have to deal with this one?
Not long after my fiancee and I moved in together (about a month or two?), the kids' BM decided to give each of them framed pictures of her and her BF (fiancee now, I guess), saying "I love you and I know you miss me over there"...WTF? I know she would go completely apeshit if their dad and I were to do something that asinine! They had been divorced and living separately for six years at that point. The kids didn't have any pics of her in their rooms until that day. Where the hell does she get off? :sick:
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Just looked up some info on
Just looked up some info on that. Thank you very much for the suggestion! This looks great!
Yes my SD did that too and
Yes my SD did that too and her dad had her bring it back to her BM's and leave it there. Hasn't been an issue since.
Oh, I was very tempted to do
Oh, I was very tempted to do just that...LOL! }:)
If you don't want pictures of
If you don't want pictures of her up in your home (who would?) just remove them. Either put them up in a box or sent them back to her house.
As for what to tell the kids - just let them know that it is never appropriate for a man to keep pictures of his ex wife up in the home. period. dot.
Kids are never too young to start learning appropriate behavior.
Maybe I could also return the
Maybe I could also return the favor...our wedding is in August, so maybe I could send over a nice "family"/wedding picture. }:)
That would totally bring me down to her level, but it's sure funny to think about.
I think I'll just wait 'till we get married, and send her pics back to her. Sorry, we're a new family here.
They are 9, 11, and soon to
They are 9, 11, and soon to be 13. Definitely old enough to understand what's going on, but young enough to be completely torn on what to think. A rock and a hard place.
I'd keep the photo, keep in
I'd keep the photo, keep in their room, but take away that silly nonsense about missing her while she's with you and reframe the photo because "It didn't go with the decor."
}:)
Excellent suggestion.
Excellent suggestion.
Yes, I agree with that too.
Yes, I agree with that too. Our rule has always been that they (his or mine) can keep a pic of the other parent IN their rooms. Not a pic of me and ex together or OH and BM together though - that would be wrong. I think it's important for mine especially as they only see their dad on school holidays, so a pic of him and the SM with the kids even would be fine, just not on public display.
I'm not thrilled at having BM's pic in my house, but I can live with it. Sometimes tempted to throw darts, or draw devil horns on it though }:)
But reframe it.
Our Bm gave ss a little 4X6
Our Bm gave ss a little 4X6 album with pictures of her and ss 2- 1/2 brothers in it. This was when SS was coming EOW and about 3 yrs old. So we just put it in his room. When SS was 4 yrs old he came to live with us full time. SS is 8 yrs old now. Every time ss get mad at me or DH he goes in his room and stare and talks and sometimes cries to her picture. Dh regrets not getting rid of it from the beginning. Its still may disappear }:)
I would put them in an different frame also to have a picture with "I love you and I know you miss me over there." Thats just crazy. DH should just make them take them back home. Dh time with the kids is his time they don't need a reminder of BM.
Yep! I think I've talked my self into getting rid of the album }:)
I'm all for getting rid of
I'm all for getting rid of it. Put it in a special box for SS - the one you keep his keepsakes and mementos in. At that age, I'm sure he doesn't know that it's even there and wont' think anything of it. I have 9 and 10 year old boys of my own.
If that photo were in my
If that photo were in my home, it would "get lost" somehow.
BM sent SS13 home with a little quarter booth printout pic of her and SS one weekend with some crappy stuff she wrote on it. This was during an especially high conflict time where BM was causing lots of trouble for DH.
SS had the picture taped above his top bunk bunk bed (where he sleeps) BARF :sick: and one day he came home and he just couldn't find it anymore. When SS asked about it, I told him I didn't know and that btw, tape was not to be used on his newly painted walls as it was bad for the paint and didn't really work anyway and things would fall off. Maybe the dogs got it }:)
SS now has a lovely framed
SS now has a lovely framed picture of him and his mother in his room that they took on her bday weekend. The frame says "I love Mum". Barf. We don't even live in England, she just probably bought a cheap frame at the dollar store for him.
Hope it was during winter
Hope it was during winter when the fireplace was in use. Or I guess a grill in the summer would work too.
After BM's 2 month inability
After BM's 2 month inability to see SS13 while waiting for the final restraining order hearing, she had taken the time to make SS13 an album. It was the first baby book/ photo album she'd ever made him.
She put a wedding pic of them and then put hear and love stickers above it. Barf!
She only had pics of him up intil age 5 when she left and then a few of him and her at present day. SS was 12 at the time she gave it to him. DH brought the album with him to mediation to show that she has not been a part of SS's life for a full 7 years which is why this "your life" album had the majority of his "life" missing from it.
Serves her right.
bwahahahahahaha! That is
bwahahahahahaha! That is FUNNY in a sad-but-true way!
Now THOSE are great ideas! A
Now THOSE are great ideas! A pic of skid and dad, and a locket so you don't have to see BM's mug - well done LOL
Even the dog knows! LOL!
Even the dog knows! LOL! That's awesome.
Leave it to animals...every time the BM (love that abbreviation, because it's also a medical one and suits her well) comes to get the kids, our cat (used to be her cat) hisses and swats at her. To add insult to injury, I pick the cat up and she starts purring and nosing my face. Bwa-hahahaha! }:)
Get ride of them. I would
Get ride of them. I would never allowed that in my home. She didn't want her marriage to work, didn't give two s**ts about her kids, and how there lives would play when they split.
People in second marriages put up with to much game playing. That come back to bite them in the end