OT - Day 4 of Juice Cleanse
I'm feeling slightly less stabby today. Which is good. My head isn't as foggy and I haven't threatened one co-worker over their breakfast hot pocket this morning.
Tried a new juice recipe last night, which had a sweet potato and beets. All I can say is :sick:.
Holy crap, that s**t was horrible. Oh my holy cow I'm getting sick to my stomach just thinking about it.
I have discovered the more the juice resembles pond scum, the better it tastes. Last night's juice was the perfect example.
Scene during last nights juice dinner, after DH juiced in layers of sweet potato, carrots, beets and apple.
DH: Shaman....you have to see how pretty the juice turned out.
Me: (looking at layered juices in the container) That is pretty, I can see why they call it the Sunset Blend.
DH: (mixing and pouring the juice into our dinner glasses) Let's check this out!
Note....mixed up juice now resembles a blood and oatmeal smoothie
Me: (shuddering, takes a sip) Not bad, a little sweet.
DH: (hiding shudder a lot better, takes a sip) Yes, not bad. It is a bit on the sweet side.
Me: (still repulsed, takes another sip) I'm trying to get past the gritty feel.
DH: (still hiding revulsion, sips again) Yes....it's sweet and gritty, isn't it.
Me: (finally getting the full effect) Oh holy crap DH.....is it me or is this kind of like drinking blood?
DH: Thanks a lot Shaman.
Me: It's like drinking pure evil.OMG! We're going to turn into vampires! I'll have to return my Jergens Natural Glow lotion to Amazon. Who ever heard of a tanned vampire? I hate wearing black all of the time. I can't wear red either! I have read hair! Oh crap......why couldn't we have done this 10 years ago when I was in my 30's?
DH: Okay...not helping me drink this any faster. And we didn't know each other 10 years ago.
Me: I think I'm going to be sick. Fortunately, I've only been drinking juice for the last 3 freaking days, so at least it won't be too horrible when I toss my cookies. Great! Now I want a cookie!
DH: Okay....that's it. You're making me sicker than the juice. I'm making up a new batch of green juice for us.
Me: It's too late! I'm already turning.
DH: (swipes my glass out of my hand and stomps to the kitchen)
Me: You can't fight it DH.....you'll join me soon.
- Shaman29's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
Yeah....we're not going to
Yeah....we're not going to juice any more sweet potatoes or beets. I can feel the evil rising in me just thinking about it.
"but really it was good (where good is defined as not making me vomit?)"
Exactly...anything that doesn't cause me to order a Buick on the porcelain phone is good.
I might have thrown the whole
I might have thrown the whole juicer out for being so contaminated.
People rave about Weight Watchers but just saying those words makes me want to start quivering in revulsion. I did the original WW which was so weird. Carrots were off limits (too much sugar content), must have liver once a week, fish mandatory a few times a week.
All sorts of weird recipes - nothing that actually resembled real food. This was almost 50 years ago. I wasn't even fat but the weight targets back then were ridiculously low. I'm 5' 6" and was told I should never weight more than 115 pounds. I do not have a tiny build at all.
One recipe I made was so bad that I threw the whole pan away. I think it was something like curried liver. :sick:
I realize that the only thing in common with today's program is the name - but I still have a big aversion to WW.
ROFLMAO... I tried Juicing -
ROFLMAO... I tried Juicing - I made it a week - I couldn't take the textures either... your descriptions are soo dead on. I love it }:)