As The New Year Approaches
I'm reflecting on the dysfunctional dynamics of a guilt riddled Disneyland dad (and letting this stuff go)
One instances comes to mind for me was when I was heading to a date with my now ex fiancé. Somehow I ended up driving ... but glad I did because when he realized he left his phone (aka his B. Beck n Call mobile pinging device) I said "nope we have reservations and we MUST be on time" ... then I floored out of the driveway and on to our destination.
Unbeknownst to me this dude allowed his young kids (and ex wife by proxy) to track his location as if he's some invalid or some dog who might run off in the night and needs to be located.
He had already told them he was going out with me and we were out for maybe a total of 4 hours
However that didn't stop his 11 year old daughter from getting triggered that her dad wasn't immediately responding to her non-stop incessant calls and texts.
She then proceeds to text pictures of herself fake crying (looking like she got kidnapped by some ruthless thugs and held for ransom...even though I know kidnapper would probably pay to have those kids taken back) all in an effort to force him to respond faster....can you say emotional blackmail artist in training?
And when he finally calls her back she cries and claims she thought he was deceased and demands to know why he didn't immediately call her back.
When he told me about this he had this stupid smirk of satisfaction and thought I was going to co-sign on this con game tactic run by her and her manipulative breeder.
As I questioned why she, as an 11 year old, would have such a reaction (if he really was de@d then wouldn't an adult tell her??? Didn't her mother hear her crying and why didn't she console her / tell her the truth??? Why would you assume someone is dead after only 4 hours of not hearing from them?!?).
When I called out the bs ... he just sat there and said nothing.
When Disneyland dads have no boundaries and their dysfunctional failed former families are emotionally manipulative / emotionally blackmailing.
Glad I don't have to deal with that mess this holiday season
All breeders & Disneyland parents should receive parenting handbooks, permanent birth control, and a lump of coal
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Comments
Congratulations on your great
Congratulations on your great escape!!
So, is he leaving you alone? Is he leaving your family alone? Did you end up blocking him?
Yeah. And, I'm focusing on ME
Yeah. And, I'm focusing on ME and enjoying my peace.....can't do that when it's expected of me to be obligated to him his kids and his ex wife
You have no idea how glad I am not to have to share a bathroom with him and his daughter AND have to clean up after his kids (and often times him too) in the bathrooms (like I'm their personal janitor), not to have to deal with his ex-wife allegedly needing respite from the kids she chose to bring in this world (using the house I used to share with him as her / her kids personal respite center), not having to deal with his needy clingy kids incessantly blowing up his phone at insane hours using him as an on-call 24-7 therapist / errand b*tch.......
Here is an article of how very cunning kids (mine didn't do this because I didn't allow it so it was mainly his kids pulling these tactics - probably learned from their breeder) use emotional blackmail, emotional manipulation, and emotional extortion
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/surviving-your-childs-adolescenc...
No and a swat to the rump!!!!
Rather than tolerating the coddled kid manipulative crap.
Thanks for the read.
No and a swatto the rump!!!
EXACTLY!
I would have been a total
I would have been a total smart ass after the "Daddy is dead" show... the next time he went to bed, I'd wait until he was juuust falling asleep then I'd shout "WAIT!!!! Did you tell your daughter you were going to sleep??? If you sleep over 4 hours she might think you're dead!! Better call her and let her know not to worry and that you won't be answering your phone for the next x hours!" Or when he has a busy day at work, blow up his phone with messages... "hey just wanted to remind you to text your daughter." "Did you let her know you're not dead, just working???" The next time he uses the bathroom. .... BANG BANG BANG on the door "Don't be in there too long!!! Your daughter might think you died!"
"WAIT!!!! Did you tell your
I wish I would have said something like that back then. I was so baffled at how people let the Disneyland dysfunctional dynamic play out and remembered being more annoyed and irritated that I couldn't even have 4 hours without his kids demanding attention.
He probably slicked loved the battle for his attention and the depths which his daughter went to to get it.
This guy is one of those who
This guy is one of those who mistakes flattery and enmeshment for parenting. Life with him would have been miserable. Barf to the fake crying pic and eww to the location tracking.
Barf to the fake crying pic
Precisely - like girl bye! You mean to sit up here and tell me if you REALLY thought he was de@d you wouldnt have the common sense as a just barely average IQ middle school aged kid to just walk in the other room and ask your mother or call your relatives?
yeah that grated my gears the most. Giving his kids power they didn't need to have.
since they knew his location they knew how to demand off schedule pickup (his kids would be like "well I see you're at home on tues right now so come pick us up.....NOW!!!")
He also would tried leaving his work schedule out so they could see it. And I made sure to put it away.
His kids demanded all of his off days, all holidays, all weekends... I'm glad he did his best to try to be available for them (and I wouldn't have minded some of what he was doing if him and his kids were more respectful with noise levels inside that house/better scheduled visits - but I felt like at times he went overboard, struggled to say no, allowed them to be in power, and thought I loved that chaos and what I perceive as parental dysfunction as much as he did.
Ugh!!!
You got away from this dysfunctional “Man”
You have to let this go. I know easier said then done. You took the first big step in leaving. This was not the relationship for you. You want control of your life. You have a very merry Christmas,, and a great new year We are proud of you for being one of us who actually got away